Hi all,

just want a bit of advise about our next door neighbours. it’s a rented house, and to be fair the main residents are fine (disregarding the Mastiff that is never walked). The issue is they have a son, or maybe grandson that stays regularly, with his child sometimes. The son is in his 20’s, his child maybe 7 or 8.

every so often when they stay there is absolute pandemonium, very late at night, which ends up with the police being called, by them. The son has been led out in handcuffs 3 or 4 times this year, and once strapped to a bed by paramedics, and police, while going absolutely crazy.

I’m assuming drugs (not the sort I’ve dabbled in i would imagine), and not particularly happy about it, I have two young boys and obviously have their interests at the forefront of my thoughts, but also worry about the young lad in there as well, he was absolutely hysterical last night.

what do I do? I can contact the landlord and inform him about the regular police visits, or do I speak to the police to see what they can tell me?

Police won’t tell you anything. I’d hope that if they spotted a child protection issue while they were there then it would be raised. If your concerns are for the child then raise it, better being proven wrong than right but silent. If it’s about your children due to the influence of the neighbours son then that’s up to you. Reporting to landlord may result in them being asked to leave.

I’m assuming drugs

Thats a fairly sizeable assumption

what do I do? I can contact the landlord and inform him about the regular police visits, or do I speak to the police to see what they can tell me?

or speak to your neighbour – and ask them if they need any help or advice. It must be pretty tough for them if this son keeps reappearing in their life, causes upset and unrest to such an extent that the police have to be called and their neighbours seem to just pretend they don’t even notice.

Sounds like the grandparents are already doing what they can if they’ve got to the point they are getting the police involved. Not sure what you’d want to get out of calling the landlord? And the police already know all about it. Maybe have a friendly, supportive, chat with your neighbours?

Not sure what you’d want to get out of calling the landlord?

Get them moved on so someone else has to put up with their shit instead, I expect.

or speak to your neighbour – and ask them if they need any help or advice.

appreciate that, but we never see them, they are never out, or if they are they tend to ignore everyone in the street. If i knew them it’s something i’d consider, but knocking on a strangers door, while their big dog is going mental in the background and having a chat about their problems probably isn’t going to achieve much.

warton

appreciate that, but we never see them, they are never out, or if they are they tend to ignore everyone in the street. If i knew them it’s something i’d consider, but knocking on a strangers door, while their big dog is going mental in the background and having a chat about their problems probably isn’t going to achieve much.

Unfortunately the same could probably be said for posting here. I would contact the landlord. And buy a gun. Assuming you are in the states. You are in the US?

The son has been led out in handcuffs 3 or 4 times this year, and once strapped to a bed by paramedics, and police, while going absolutely crazy.

I’m assuming drugs

That’s why I had to stop drinking buckfast.

Are you wanting the situation to be made better? Or just no longer a problem that affects you?

Are you wanting the situation to be made better? Or just no longer a problem that affects you?

well, if the situation is made better it no longer affects us. I worry for the young lad, last night was pretty distressing. I worry for our kids, as although the incidents are always at night, there’s nothing to say it won’t happen during the day, when they’re playing in the street.

every time the police attend they will (should) complete a child protection record for social services to get in touch assess and review.

You assume drugs – what if it is mental illness or disability that he is trying to control?

You know nothing. The police will tell you nothing and I assume that there is nothing you can tell them that they don’t already know. Don’t waste their time by being a nosy neighbour or NIMBY.

Landlord has nothing to do with it unless there is a breach of covenant or long lease.

The only thing I can add to this (other than that as a father with young kids I do empathise with you), that assumptions are probably the cause of as much grief and bother in this life as anything else. Our American cousins say words to the effect of (Assume nothing because it makes an ass out of u and me

Whilst I generally dislike those kinds of trite phrases, there is a lot of truth lurking in there..

it’s a fair point, regarding the mental health.

I’m not being a nosey neighbour, I’v been woken up 4 or 5 times this year in the early hours by absolute mayhem next door and I want to make sure I’m doing the right thing by reporting / not reporting it to someone else.

what do I do?

Move house, or ask them to move house?

Got experience here…

If the tenant has signed a contract then somewhere in there should be something about not making a pain in the arse of yourself. This should include anyone visiting the home. If this is regular(ish) and police are being called / its causing an impact to you and your family this definitely ticks that box. Maybe if you know who the landlord is, have a word and see if they can pass a warning to the tenant that its affecting people who live around them.

Trouble is, its most likely going to result in problems for your neighbours due to their son’s behaviour which could lead to eviction.

If thats the route you want to go down then Anti Social Behaviour team in the local council are the people to speak to. Will result in worded warnings/home visits/speaking to police etc. The problem is if the house is council let – apparently people are harder to evict from council properties than private ones.

All this NIMBY stuff is rubbish. You want to have a safe environment for your family and having some nut job next door who regularly gets led away by the police doesn’t, in my eyes, constitute that.

The op isn’t trying to palm this problem off to somebody else, ‘so they have to deal with his shit’- as if the grandson is only visiting, no doubt the problem exists at the grandson’s main residence too.
It is understandable and human nature to want to protect yourself and your own family as a priority.
I would speak to the landlord, and also contact environmental health.

Perhaps those taking the moral high ground would offer some counselling or sit him down in a tapping circle next time he is being taken away in handcuffs?

Davey, I’ll look into the Anti social behavior team, thank you.

we’re going to have a chat with the other neighbours to the house. we’re friendly with them, so we’re going to see what they think of the whole situation.

One of the issues at the back of my mind is he is a big unit. if there was any agro on the street, I’ve no doubt he would easily batter me, and no idea what happens next with my kids and wife. So, drugs, or mental health, or just a nasty bloke, I’m not really bothered, i just want to be sure my family are safe.