Here is a thought.

Bungees and big bottles of water strapped to your frame.

You can buy platypus tubes with screw tops and your center of gravity will not deviate all that much.

Seriously. If I see another tool with his full face helmet and mule i’m going to give him a good hiding. Especially when he’s on the canal.

come again?

Camel-backs.

he’s on the canal

Was he riding one of these:

?

How do you know he’s not on his way to or from some mega outing, not everyone rocks up in the latest Merc/VW van.