I have a small moral dilemma and I see it quite clearly but wondered if others had been in a similar scenario.

So to set the scene and summarise.

Job A – Lead role, amazing package potential, hour commute into London
Job B – Non-lead, good ‘for local’ package, 15 minute commute by car aka more home life

– Applied for Job A in July started interviewing
– 2 weeks later applied for Job B started interviewing
– Offered Job B within 2 weeks in August so resigned and started my 3 month notice period with current employer – yeah 3 months sucks.
– However, Job A interviewing is still ongoing (I am down to the last 3) and I won’t hear anything for another 2 weeks which leads me about 1-2 weeks away from starting with Job B.

So, that’s the dilemma.

Mrs Elliott thinks I shouldn’t bother chasing Job A anymore, (bird in the hand and all that), and tell them so but to me this a question of closure rather than morals. I applied with them first and started the process first so therefore I want to close the book on it – I may not even get it after all, but Job A would elevate my career considerably.

Obviously I don’t want to let people down as they have been waiting for me for 3 months but ultimately this is my career and therefore my ‘business’ decision.

I wonder if anyone else thinks I’m being a bit of an arse or if anyone has been in similar situation and what did you do?

I’d take job B either way myself…. but i wouldn’t hold it against you if you don’t…

That said… If you’ve accepted the job B and they’re holding it for you, it’s a bit crap if you then bail on them

Go through the process with job A, definitely. No harm will come with pursuing it, worst case you end up with a tough decision to make about which one to take.

Big enough industry that you wont be known as that arse who pulled out of Job B few weeks prior to start date and dropped Company B in the shit for the rest of your career?

It’s not your fault that job A has a ridiculously complex and drawn out interviewing process. At the end of the day they can only hire people who are available, and people who applied 3 months ago aren’t necessarily still available.

OTOH – if you prefer to take job A, then hold out. It’s your life – your career. Just let them know you need to speed up the process a bit as you have an offer on the table.

Yeah, I’ve done this before, perhaps not with exact circumstances.
Project manager of ‘B’ said “you’ll never work in this industry again”.

I’ve been working ever since…

If there was a decision between 30min a day commute and a 2hr a day commute (only looking at time alone, let alone cost implications) it would be a no brainer for me.

I’m kind of in a similar-ish position – been offered a job (I never applied for) which would offer big promotion and probably big pay increase, but will incur a circa 3hrs a day commuting by car…

A short commute and better work / life balance has a lot of commendations.

Job A.
In this life you have to look after number 1..
If this is the job you really want then that’s what you should go for ..
They will have a replacement for you soon enough in Job B..
Do NOT under any circumstances try to speed up the process as advised above ..as one of three that would put you on the bottom rung if things are that close ..

Look after yourself, the company won’t care what they do with you.

We have had people turn round the day before they were due to start saying they have got a better offer.

If I worked for Job A co and found you’d accepted a Job B offer and then walked away I’d seriously consider withdrawing any offer.

Big enough industry that you wont be known as that arse who pulled out of Job B few weeks prior to start date and dropped Company B in the shit for the rest of your career?

Haha, this is pretty much what I said to Mrs E earlier 😆

Yup definitely press on with job A unless you are certain you wouldn’t take it if offered. Job B may turn out crap, they may sack you or the whole company may fold and think how stupid you’d feel in either position. They will have back-up candidates anyway…

I would probably go for Job B unless Job A is amazingly better.
Last time I was interviewing had two fairly well progressed. One offered me a job so contacted the other and asked them to decide one way or another then.

As it happened they did offer as well and gave the better deal so still with them.

Yeah, I’ve done this before, perhaps not with exact circumstances.
Project manager of ‘B’ said “you’ll never work in this industry again”.

I’ve been working ever since…

And if it’s a promotion you may well end up their manager in the future.

I’d keep on with the interviews for A, but if you do get it then I’d be immediately open with B and tell them the situation, they may be able to compromise with a more senior role and/or training if they think you’re good enough.

If there was a decision between 30min a day commute and a 2hr a day commute (only looking at time alone, let alone cost implications) it would be a no brainer for me.

I went from a 10min ride to a 45-60min drive I actually now do far more riding because my commute takes me past some great spots I can now ride on a weekday without having to drive 45min each way for a 1.5-2.0 hour ride. Objectively that doesn’t make sense, I still spend more time in the car, but it’s how things end up working out.

If I worked for Job A co and found you’d accepted a Job B offer and then walked away I’d seriously consider withdrawing any offer.

You would expect those you’re interviewing to not have applications in elsewhere? That’s about as deluded as the interviewee walking in, seeing another candidate in reception and leaving because you’re wasting their time hedging your bets across multiple candidates.

Do what ever suits you, I would have no problem starting job B and jumping ship to job A a few weeks later if it was what I wanted. Most companies have very few morals when the shoe is on the other foot and would drop you the minute it suited them

We get people pulling out from offers at the last minute regular. It’s inconvenient but that’s life.

My brother in law is always switching roles in construction and moves on. He’s a site manager building homes but if someone offers more, he is of, even if just accepted a role. Done him no harm as most companies know him.

I’ve been in a similar situation applied for 6 jobs all interviews within a few weeks of each other. Before I accepted any offers or had even been made any I was upfront that I had other interviews and would decide once all were done and let them know as soon as possible either way. If I had accepted the 1st offer I would of cancelled other interviews.
6 job offers later and abit of negotiation with the favourites job done. All 5 that I turned down left the door open if I changed my mind or anything changed. Where if I had said nothing and turned a job down after accepting I doubt I’d even get a interview in the future.

You would expect those you’re interviewing to not have applications in elsewhere?

There’s a *huge* (imo) difference between having other applications or even job offers in your hand and accepting a job somewhere and agreeing a start date.

The latter reflects a commitment, the former are just part of a negotiation.

Get the Job A offer in hand and use it to bargain a better wage, hours or benefits out of Job B

I think this on balance unless you really want Job A

I dont think there is anything that morally wrong with any options

Employers are not your friends they hire you to make money they sack you when they cannot. That sort of loyalty can be bought [literally] and we owe them what they owe us and that is all in the contract you have as yet not signed .

There should only be one consideration here, and that’s what best for you.

We had someone email at 1:30am on the day they were suppose to start that they had changed their mind.

Shit happens.

Life’s too short to take a job that isn’t the one you really want just because you don’t want to let people down.

Again I will disagree. I have been in this exact situation. I would not shaft company B. Morals and all that. Either take company B job or tell them now you don’t want it.

tjagain – Member
Again I will disagree. I have been in this exact situation. I would not shaft company B. Morals and all that. Either take company B job or tell them now you don’t want it.

And every day in job B you sit there thinking how bored you are and job A would have been so much better…

Nah, morals shmorals, what a load of rubbish. Go for the job you want the most, regardless of verbally accepting a job or not. As others have said, employers will often see staff as numbers anyway even if they make you feel like they care. When the straps are tightened they show their true colours.

I agree go for the job you want the most – but simply do not shaft the other one. Would you like it if the positions were reversed?

Extra travelling time will equate to nearly 2 whole weeks of commuting every year.. but if it’s your dream job go for it

Most companies have very few morals when the shoe is on the other foot and would drop you the minute it suited them

This times a zillion. Do what’s best for you – do you imagine that Company A, B or Z will put you before themselves in any circumstances?

Not sure what the dilemma is here, if you were offered both would use pick Job A? If so then carry on as you are and complete the interview process. If you would still take Job B then stop messing the company around in Job A and tell them you’ve accepted another offer.

get offer for job A take it to new job B boss and see what you can get extra

I’ve been made redundant twice now. Do I think for a second that there was anguish and hand wringing whilst senior management were making the decision? Was there bollocks! I was a number on a spreadsheet, the wrong role in the new structure. As one manager, also a friend, told me, “It’s not personal, it’s business”. Hated him for a long time before I realised that he was right.

What I’m getting at is do what’s right for you and yours. Whatever you decide the company losing out will adapt, it’s how they survive. If the situation was reversed you’d be dropped like a hot coal if it benefitted the company.

I agree go for the job you want the most – but simply do not shaft the other one. Would you like it if the positions were reversed?

No, I felt like going out of that particular meeting in a way that would make the evening news. But they still did it.

My mistake last time was offering them too much sodding loyalty, should have left years before and ignored the claims that pay/training would be restored soon.

There is no moral dilemma, you took job B as it was offered to you and you didn’t know if you’d get A.

If you get A would prefer that job then take it, yes B employers will be pissed off but this happens from time to time. It’s Ok to apply for more then one job at a time and to take the on your preferred option.

If I worked for Job A co and found you’d accepted a Job B offer and then walked away I’d seriously consider withdrawing any offer.

How very strange not taking on an employee that chose your company over another one.

Was in a very similar situation, Job A was a dream job with a dream company, Job B was fine, and I needed something after redundancy. I had signed a contract and was within 5 days of starting Job B when Job A finally came through. I had a moral dilemma for all of 5 seconds before I turned down Job B, 4 years later and I can safely say it’s one of the best decisions I ever made.

If I worked for Job A co and found you’d accepted a Job B offer and then walked away I’d seriously consider withdrawing any offer.

If you are in a competitive industry with high competition for good people, employers can’t and won’t do this, they want the best people and will do whatever it takes to get them.
I’d suggest being up front with Job A that you are in process for another role and getting short on time to make a decision, I did this to put some pressure on when I was in this situation and we have candidates do it all the time.

tjagain – Member
I agree go for the job you want the most – but simply do not shaft the other one. Would you like it if the positions were reversed?

would they think twice about it, no they wouldn’t. They’d do what’s best for the company. Ergo the op should do what’s best for him. If that means stringing along the other company, so be it.

I would carry on with job A until the process finishes and if it suited take it and bin off job b. As mentioned above employers would do the same to you in an instant, Mrs Kilo is a HR director people do this all the time and it’s no big thing

Outside Leeds station today. Bridges burnt.

I wouldn’t employ somebody that can’t spell ‘worst’.

EDIT: But at least they got ‘arse’ right.

That’s one way to resign… 😆

Is that wwaswas’s car?