Stuff that makes you disproportionately cross

Recipes that call for a thumb sized piece of ginger, is that a big thumb or a little thumb. Do we count to the first or second knuckle, perhaps even further? Then once you’ve decided what size thumb you want but your piece of ginger is shaped nothing like a thumb and once peeled is now half the size of your thumb.

It’s ginger, if in doubt add a little extra. Yum.

But yes that reminds me about recipes that call for, say, shredded carrots and then are very vague about whether you should weigh them before peeling/shredding or after.

and once peeled is now half the size of your thumb.

You’re peeling your ginger all wrong. Grr. Just scrape it with a knife or even a teaspoon, the peel is very thin, like carrots.

This should really go in the “things that make me cross thread”.

The Wife’s car got damaged whilst we were away on holiday, minor damage but enough to involve the insurance. It’s been in the repair shop for three weeks now, they are having a third attempt at getting the repair right. That’s annoying but they’ll have to keep going until it’s right.

That isn’t the source of my disproportionate crossness. The email from Enterprise who are supplying the courtesy car reads as follows:

Please may you contact ourselves regarding the hire car
Kind regards

You’re peeling your ginger all wrong. Grr. Just scrape it with a knife or even a teaspoon, the peel is very thin, like carrots.

Are you saying you peel carrots? 😲 (Regardless of implement used.)

Edit: agree with teaspoon for ginger

Shoelaces that come undone all the time.  It’s 2023, surely by now someone has invented shoelaces with a bit of friction

Emojis, stickers and memes.

Used by anyone anywhere anyhow unless they are under 13 years old.

Note the lack of smiley face.

Please may you contact ourselves regarding the hire car

Passive-aggressive emails from the Indian subcontinent that end ‘Please revert to myself’. I suppose we just have to accept that Inglish and English are diverging, but I still find this excruciating.

I’ve got a couple of colleagues who email “please may you…”  I know they are trying to be polite but it really irks me.

The use of “dis” as the opposite of something. Eg. Regulated/disregulated, invited/disinvited and todays rage inducing one benefit/disbenefit.
There were perfectly acceptable words for all of the above before some asshat decided to invent a new word for the same thing.
Dis anything can get in the **** sea.

EDIT: angry face emoji removed to not upset Winston.

Are you saying you peel carrots?

Sometimes. Depends on the carrots and what I’m doing with them.

By the way, if you use an actual peeler, keep going until you’ve shaved through the whole carrot into a pile of peelings. Good to eat like this!

Note the lack of smiley face.

And the lack of grumpy face. Now I’m confused. Are you being sarcastic? Your meaning is entirely lost without little faces, how am I meant to understand? 🤔❓

Shoelaces that come undone all the time.  It’s 2023, surely by now someone has invented shoelaces with a bit of friction

Have you tried the rugby knot*? Normal overhand knot then when you loop the lace round the bite, loop it twice. It looks like a normal knot, releases like a normal knot but it as tough as a double knot.

*this might not be the correct name, but it has always been called that in my house.

 then when you loop the lace round the bite, loop it twice

will try

Americans on Youtube saying ‘Acclimated’ rather than Acclimatised.

Divs.

bite

Bight.

(I was angry with myself for a second for getting so annoyed over a slight mistake, but then realised this is the perfect thread for it)

Googling Google maps for ‘campsites’, and what you often get is loads of caravan sites, that don’t allow tents anyway, even if you did want to be surrounded by a corral of white plastic boxes on manicured gravel parking bays.

Caravans aren’t camping. Where’s the suffering?

Can’t they call them just caravan sites so there’s some separation when searching?*

*Yeah I know you can put parameters into Ukcampsite when searching, but their website was designed in the 1950s and I prefer to use Google maps.

With the tying of shoelaces, there are two ways of doing a normal knot depending on whether you start with right over left or left over right. If the “ears” of the knot are pointing in the same direction as the laces then it’s the strong version and should resist coming undone, if the ears are at 90° to the laces (i.e. pointing up towards your leg and down to your toes) then it’s the weak version of the knot.

The use of “dis” as the opposite of something. Eg. Regulated/disregulated, invited/disinvited and todays rage inducing one benefit/disbenefit.There were perfectly acceptable words for all of the above before some asshat decided to invent a new word for the same thing.Dis anything can get in the **** sea.

EDIT: angry face emoji removed to not upset Winston.

on the flip side, it means the opposite of disgruntled is gruntled… 

The use of “dis” as the opposite of something.

and people who don’t know the difference between ‘uninterested’ and ‘disinterested’. They’re the worst.

Shoelaces that come undone all the time. It’s 2023, surely by now someone has invented shoelaces with a bit of friction

Round profile shoelaces are the culprit, flat ones are best.

on the flip side, it means the opposite of disgruntled is gruntled… 

It’s been a great day. I’m turbed, enheartened and combobulated.

Ok jam-bo, I concede there are some valid uses such as in the thread title but that doesn’t mean people should stick it in front of any word they want to make up new words for no reason when we already have existing words for what they want to convey.
Notably, in my experience, the people using these primarily work for consultancies or ‘think tanks’ where they think it makes them sound clever. Instead it just marks them out as utter wallopers.

With the tying of shoelaces, there are two ways of doing a normal knot depending on whether you start with right over left or left over right

I’ve been doing it wrong all my life.  Can I add myself to things that make me disproportionately cross

Or at least until I’ve tried this method for a week or two and it works

The use of “dis” as the opposite of something. Eg. Regulated/disregulated, invited/disinvited and todays rage inducing one benefit/disbenefit.

Disbenefits is a genuine one – it gets used a lot in transport modelling schemes where you’re looking at the pros and cons of traffic interventions.

I promise you it’s not being used to annoy you, it is an Actual Thing.

If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to revert to myself…

😉

If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to revert to myself…

😉

When the day of freedom comes brother, you’ll be first up against the wall.

Grown adults who should know better trying to speak like da yoof.

Remember when you used to laugh at middle aged folk trying to look cool by using words you used? Yeah, you’re that guy now.

‘Touch the grass’
Etc.

Disbenefits is a genuine one – it gets used a lot in transport modelling schemes where you’re looking at the pros and cons of traffic interventions.

Does that make it a real word?  Disadvantage?  Downside?  Drawback? etc etc.  Lots of good english words to use that are the opposite of benefits

Lots of nonsense is regularly used in all sorts of specialities.  Doesn’t stop it being poor english :-)

Typing a long reply then having the forum bin the lot because I used a bracket somewhere.

Senior people at work expecting you to work on work related thing when not at work. Or come in early/finish late for the same

I used to get a variation on this. I worked in a 6th form college where the start time for the students was 8.50am and finish at 4.10 pm. I used to arrive as the doors were being unlocked at 7 am because a, I work much better in the mornings, b, the traffic was so much easier so I could get there in 20 minutes rather than the 45 it would have taken me if  I left home at 8am and c, there were no queues for the photocopier etc and few distractions for at least an hour. I would then leave at about 4.20pm assuming there were no scheduled meetings as again the traffic was much easier and I was usually completely knackered by then ( I realise now that this was probably the start of my CFS ) get home have a break and then do some more preparation at home.
I used to get snide comments from my colleagues and sometimes from the management as being a ‘ clock watcher’, a‘part timer’ because I didn’t stay till 5 pm like they did and made sure the management had seen them. But some of them had turned up at 8.45am or later so I had spent at least as long as they had at work.

This was ten years ago but it still rankles

used to get snide comments from my colleagues and sometimes from the management as being a ‘ clock watcher’, a‘part timer’ because I didn’t stay till 5 pm like they did and made sure the management had seen them. But some of them had turned up at 8.45am or later so I had spent at least as long as they had at work.

This was ten years ago but it still rankles

Did you ever send lots of emails that started “As I sit here in the office by myself at 7am…”?

If not you missed a trick.

There is no ‘I’ in team.

But there is a ‘U’ in *u**.

I’ve found myself doing a quick ctrl-c on my text after clicking submit if I spot the browser struggling!

Work family
Work wife
Work hubby

With the tying of shoelaces, there are two ways of doing a normal knot depending on whether you start with right over left or left over right

I’ve been doing it wrong all my life. Can I add myself to things that make me disproportionately cross

Or at least until I’ve tried this method for a week or two and it works

If that doesn’t work out here’s a few more options.

https://www.fieggen.com/shoelace/knots.htm

and people who don’t know the difference between ‘uninterested’ and ‘disinterested’. They’re the worst.

Myself couldn’t be more disinterested if I tried.

I could care less to be honest

It’s been a great day. I’m turbed, enheartened and combobulated

I always feel the same after a night dancing at the co

Some of these make my feels at dis-ease.

I always feel the same after a night dancing at the co

-op?

People don’t peel carrots? First against the wall when I’m in charge.

With the tying of shoelaces, there are two ways of doing a normal knot depending on whether you start with right over left or left over right.

Now that I’m less disproportionately cross about losing a lengthy post I’ll try again.

This is a Granny Knot vs a Reef Knot. If you tie two cords (say) left-over-right and then left-over-right again, you end up with a shit knot because there is very little friction in the system. If instead they oppose (so one LoR and the other RoL) then the cords run parallel and the knot is considerably stronger.

The former is unfortunately instinctive. Try this as an experiment: put your hands on the table in front of you, then quickly fold your arms. You’ll have one hand on top, the other underneath. Now repeat the process only folding them the other way. It’s trivial with practice but the first time you try it’ll likely bake your noodle. (I’m available for parties, weddings, bar mitzvahs…)

Now, the same is true of shoelaces, only it’s not as immediately obvious when the second knot is formed with two loops learned by some bollocks about a rabbit sticking its ears up its arse or something back when you were in infant school. Look at your laces right now, are they straight or are they at a pissed angle? If they’re crooked then you’re probably tying them wrong.

Unlearning this after decades is hard but the fix is actually really easy, carry on tying the bow as you always have and just reverse the ‘hand’ of the bottom knot instead.

Unlearning this after decades is hard…

As I am now discovering.  I couldn’t describe how I tie laces but my hands absolutely know and are not happy about the change