For my sins I used to go to the local residents association meetings when we first moved in to the village.
There is a very small triangle of turf that separates the pub from the bus turning circle, we’re talking 2 x 4m. This used to get parked on and thus was a muddy mess. It was the RAs favourite topic of debate.
How do we improve the grass outside the pub?
Shall we put a tree on it? No, it will get knocked over.
Shall we put a bench on it? No, it will get knocked over.
Shall we put a couple of massive rocks on it? No, they will damage cars.
Shall we tarmac it? No, it will look ugly.
Shall we concrete it and paint it green? No, that won’t stop the cars.
Shall we just leave it as it is and moan about it on the first Wednesday of every month?… Silence.
They also liked to talk at length about dog shit.