As we’re unlikely to be having a holiday any time soon, I’m thinking of installing a hot tub in our garden and budget means it will have to be 2nd hand. Size wise roughly 5-6 person. I’m talking about the hard shell variety, not a lazy spa inflatable one. Question is, are they a seriously bad idea?

I’m well aware of the running costs and requirements for electrics, plus the right place to put it etc etc. I’ve got a few mates who builders/plumbers/electricians who can help with all of that.

My main worry is that they seem to be the kind of product that could potentially be a bit of a money pit. Is there anything in particular to lookout for or is it the kind of thing where it makes more sense to buy new? I know there are some 2nd hand bargains to be had but not if they then end up costing lots to fix and meaning more grief in the long run.

I can’t advise on the technical issues a second hand one might have, but I suspect a lot get sold as they simply don’t gets used after the novelty wears off, and they just sit there taking up space and using electricity.

My old man used to have a pretty nice one, and ended up selling it very cheap on the condition the buyer paid for the removal, which was not an easy feat.

Are they a good idea?

Depends on how you feel about soaking yourself in someone elses love juices….

I’ll get my coat….

Spunky love pool yuck

Brother in law had a 2nd hand one from a hot tub company (not a private seller) and it was fine

You’ll get used ones for sale as folk realise how much they cost to run.

Spunky love pool

I thought the approved STW name was ‘fetid sex pond’?

whose hand is it?

If you have a low budget for the hottub can you really afford to run it?

We’ve a 5 seater and a lay-z-spa, the inflatable get’s used the most and the larger is off to spunk-pool heaven.

I can turn a blind eye on previous uses, providing it gets a proper clean. Have you ever stayed in a hotel bedroom and wondered what’s gone on in that bed before..?

Running costs etc I can live with. We’ve sort of “done the maths” and we wouldn’t be looking to get one if it wasn’t going to get used a lot.

The tubs are usually sound. The frames can rot. It’s mainly the electronic’s pumps etc that go.
It’s pretty straight forward hack on smaller tubs to use the pump unit off an inflatable Lazy Spa complete with heater, blower and controls.
They are coming up for buttons, as people’s inflatable liners knacker.
It’s only the jet pump and ozone gen that you can’t replace with the inflatable tub’s pump unit, so need a separate control for those.

For the cash you could have a load of lazyspa/intex ones. Our intex adds £40 plus to the monthly leccy. Loads easier to look after than the real ones, and less spendy if it gets broken.

Spunky love pool

They were due to be playing Kentish Town Forum next week, supported by lazyspa/intex. Obviously with the Covid, they aren’t now

Nasty Sex Pond is the correct nomenclature.

Owner of a Nasty Sex Pond here. It’s a hot spring salt water one, took ages to get enough Jizz in it to make it salty enough though 😂 Generates it’s own Chlorine so not a lot if any chemicals used. Sits at 40 degrees year round costs about £10 a week to heat we guess (rough guess). Gets used maybe 3-4 times a week, no guests, no neighbours, no pampas and no bowl for keys thankyouverymuch

We’ve looked into going down the inflatable route and have used one before at a place we stayed at in Italy last summer. Nothing wrong with them at all but we prefer something a bit more permanent.

no guests, no neighbours, no pampas and no bowl for keys

I think you’ve missed a trick, with a live streaming webcam it would pretty much pay for itself.

The proper ones are ceratainly better and more solid feeling/well designed and they have nozzels and modes in more ‘interesting’ massage places for various positions of ‘relaxation’.

Nasty Sex Pond is the correct nomenclature.

I thought it was “filthy sex pond”? I must update my autocorrect.

My sister had a large hot tub. Not a sex pool, more a sooth the joints during chemotherapy spa. Some fun kids birthday parties too. Still have the tub despite not having the sister. I like them but you must be meticulous about water quality.

Don’t discount the noise.

Christ the noise

The proper ones are better, and noisier. My colleague has gone from the inflateable to a proper one.

Be aware they all take looking after. Rules about use. Don’t go in full of deodorant or perfume or make up – it ends up in the filter and also foams up the water – like what a swimming pool says, make sure you are clean (also get’s rid of dead skin first). No, under any circumstances, any fake tan folk near them – the chlorine will strip it off and mess up the tub.

I’d also recomend you have a permanent place for a blow up pool too – don’t take them down at this time of year as the plastic gets brittle. We have a covered gazebo, perspex roof, half perspex to two sides, one side brick (garage wall), and one side open, but with fabric shower curtains to keep heat in during the winter, and you can open the curtains to let heat out, as well as one side window that opens to allow air flow.

Have you any teens – make sure they shower first – flipping dirty monkeys – usually dead skin that clogs the filters. Pre covid, if my teens invited mates round, then it really was a deep clean the next day – water drained, tub cleaned (easy with inflateable as you can tip it up) then new water and ‘dose’ with chlorine.

You also need to keep on top of chlorine doses – just a couple of tea spoons a few times a week, but it has to be done, and adjust with PH chemicals, anti foam, and ‘pool clear’.

It’s a pain at first but you soon learn what needs to be done. If people have showered before, you aren’t going to get the water issues, sex pond antics aside ! 🙂

The Mrs uses it most. She’s in there now. I find it a bit ‘hot’. It’s great when my back is playing up, or if you are having sleepless nights – pop in mid evening for 30 minutes, you’ll sleep well later.

But, bear in mind £40 plus leccy bill per month, and cleaning (not an issue if folk are clean going in). They are great in winter – that’s why we covered ours with a gazebo.

daily mash

They sound expensive, noisy, hard work and boring . What is it about them that is so appealing?

I can’t advise on the technical issues a second hand one might have, but I suspect a lot get sold as they simply don’t gets used after the novelty wears off, and they just sit there taking up space and using electricity.

Not sure I agree. even if you don’t use the sex pond then it will still get manky if not looked after routinely. My mates got one and it take a reasonable amount of looking after. Regularly checking the water and testing it, adjusting the chemicals. And it does suck the juice. I’d imagine with a used one you’d want some form of bleach or deadly steriliser to be thoroughly run though the pipes to be sure everything is killed and protect you from the effects of a poorly maintained unit. Having said all that you get in them if you’re at a hotel with one, or sometimes when we’ve rented holiday cottages they have them and we don’t think twice about jumping in.

What filters are you using that get clogged by dead skin? Get a sand filter instead, you just change the flow to backwash the crap out of the filter.

This is STW, Shirley a wood burning hot tub is the answer 🤔

They sound expensive, noisy, hard work and boring . What is it about them that is so appealing?

The endless wet sex. Haven’t we made that clear?

No need for ozone or clarifier if you are using chlorine or bromine (which you will need to) so actually no need for those other chemicals at all (so don’t worry if that pump breaks). Hydrochloric acid for the ph.

Chlorine will deal with pretty much anything organic including breaking it down. But the more organic ‘material’ the more chlorine you will need – shouldn’t need to empty. Filters will need cleaning.

If you have a salt water chlorine generator that certainly reduces the maintenance pfaff. Once you get used to the chlorine consumption you won’t need to test so often.

salt water chlorine generator is more expensive up front cost but cheaper on going.

Heating It will be expensive. Insulation will help. Gas heater will be cheaper on going but heavy up front cost.

It’s a lot of pfaff.

Order on dog & bone or cum local B&Q with 5 bags of sand.

Bob’s your Uncle, Fanny’s your Aunt – well they’re actually your mum and dad too.

🤡

How does any of this fit with any kind of reduction of consumptiony lifestyle thing?

A bath in the garden?

Having a hot tub at home ruins the novelty of having one when you’re on holiday! Plus then you can leave someone else to worry about looking after it…

MCTD-True, will post the link to the Cam site imminently. It’s quite tough sucking my gut in every time I get in and out though.

TL;DR

Our friends rented one at the start of lockdown and they loved it. If you can try to rent one locally for a fortnight or month, then you’ll work out if you want one permanently.

How does any of this fit with any kind of reduction of consumptiony lifestyle thing?

It doesn’t, ditto ‘fun’ cars and motorbikes.

It’s a hot spring salt water one, took ages to get enough Jizz in it to make it salty enough though 😂

That’s what I like, commitment!