Forum menu
I always drop petri dishes.
[img] 
[/img] 🤣
lacking any natural affinity with Terpsichore , I rely on enthusiasm, energy, and beer.
Molgrips, was this you? 😛
I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently.
Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook 30-minute brownies in 20 minutes.I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello. I was scouted by the Mets. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire.
I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven.
I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.
But, I have not yet gone to college.
I lile to think I worship at a pretty broad church - as a younger man, there were things I would rule out as crap because I didn't know anything beyond a cliched description, these days I'll give most things a go if I haven't tried it and hated it before, if I like it then great, if I hate it I never have to do it again.
So: I love books, music and the theatre in that order - I have enjoyed writing and earned modest pennies at it, I can play a few instruments mediocrely (best is bass guitar, which is ever the refuge of those not quite arsed enough to learn proper guitar), and I do a bit of am dram (16 plays in 6 years, which is a chunk for am stuff).
I have enjoyed concerts and festivals, I have been gobsmacked by quality ballet, and fairly bored by opera. I can do basics of a few languages, I can make something edible out of whatever I find in the fridge.
I like sport (and briefly hosted a sports radio show on the world's smallest internet radio station) - big fan of motorsports, fan of anything on two wheels except speedway, like a bit of boxing and football and rugby, and even known to watch cricket live (although only live - telly's not a cricket medium for me). I've done all at (again!) mediocre levels, although I'm proudest of my undefeated boxing record (1-0, baby - read it and weep!). I'm a bit crap at sport, even though I love it.
I think, what's standing out for me is that I'm ok at stuff but can't really arsed to commit enough to get good at anything!
I don't know art, but I know I like marmite.
No interest in music despite coming from a family with some exceptionally talented musicians, some professional.
Cannot understand the obsession with watching ball sports of any sort, although don't mind a game.
I don't care what the weather is doing. I like it regardless.
That means I'm no good at casual small talk, and that's my other cultural failing, it doesn't bother me.
I studied fine art at university, I loved going into the studio everyday and painting. I had the potential to be good at drawing from life, but I was more interested in what potential visual language I could invent. I continued to paint after I finished university for several years, but there was no desire to water it down to enable production of anything of marketable value to make a living from. I was also fairly cut off from any artistic communities and was pretty much scared of approaching people. Found some online communities but over the years my work didn't attract enough interest for me to maintain a desire to stick at it. Basically, I wasn't the Pablo Picasso I thought I was.
I am pretty good at most things with the exception of communication. So you'll just have to take my word for it.
Shakespeare and ballet, Just don’t get it...
Jack of all trades - master of none if i think of arts & culture. Though I like to eat ,not cook & NOT good in large(or small) social gatherings.
Good at academics - are you the bloke who drinks water at the pub quiz?ha 😉
I’m not as funny as I think I am.
Horse racing.
Molgrips, was this you?
painting and visual arts; I appreciate and love other peoples but I cannot do it myself, my handwriting is terrible also. I'm aware that it's a practice thing but I spent all the available time doing music, my pen skills start and finish with the ability to draw a 3D box and a cartoon cat.
my handwriting is terrible also
Oh, likewise. It always was, but I pick up a pen so rarely these days that I can barely write my own name.
I figure, if god had meant us to write things down he wouldn't have given us keyboards.
Not having any and not being arsed about it.
I figure that SaxonRiders Glaring Cultural Weakness is his rather elitist notion that not liking or doing something is a Glaring Cultural Weakness rather than simply being a matter of free choice.
Calling Jordan Peterson to the thread.
I’m not as funny as I think I am.
If at first you don't succeed......
If at first you don’t succeed……
Exactly. You need to shovel loads of shit if you want to find a diamond 💎
Also, I quite enjoy annoying those who are easily annoyed.
@scotroutes: I don’t really get what you mean. There are a few things I wish I could do, but have never prioritised, and so they remain ‘weaknesses’ to me (and to others, when opportunity arises to exercise them).
So, for example, cooking is one, but so is any type of building work (something my dad could do proficiently), and dancing.
Consequently, although I love dance as an art form, I freeze when in a situation that might involve me undertaking any form of dance in front of animate objects. I wish I didn’t.
And when it comes to the kitchen, you could put a jar of peanut butter and two pieces of bread in front of me when I’m hungry, and it still wouldn’t dawn on me to make a sandwich. I don’t impress myself with my ‘kitchen-blindness’, and I certainly don’t impress others.
I won't say that I like something if I don't like it; this applies to art, food, wine, music, overly-long films, etc. I am that little child in the story of "The Emperor's New Clothes"
I really want to find astronomy and space fascinating, but can't
My strength is being able to identify a d@ckhead quite quickly - my weakness is tolerating them for very long.
I am not sure I see it as a "weekness" - thats rather judgemental IMO
However most poetry. opera, dance and much art leaves me cold. I just don#'t get it at all. Opera especially - the singing hurts my ears.