[Closed] Your dream job advert - in five words

Must be very lazy. £Loads.

Bike Tester

Central Alpine Location

earn money touching boobs now

SEX GOD MUST RIDE BIKE

swallows not spits?

whiskey taster!

immigration opportunity on vancouver island

Horses winter / bikes summer £loads

Big Tits, Rich, Wants you.

Wanted: Spitfire Pilot

Training given.

Part time professional internet surfer.

(no change there then!)

Queen Rania seeks new husband.

Wanted: Private Dick
Discretion Assured.

🙂

Kicker for Tony Blair's testicles.

I'd tire of that eventually, but for the first five years or so it'd be ace.

Wanted: Headmaster, Henchman Academy

£mucho

Ninja Wanted

Probably not the kind of ninja you had in mind
http://www.simplyhired.com/a/jobs/list/q-ninja

cyclist wanted to cook curry!

Time Traveller Required. Training Given.

Time Traveller Required. Training Given.

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Is that Vanilla Ice wanting to go back to when he was successful? 😆

Billionaire Playboy Wanted. Funds supplied.

Probably not the kind of ninja you had in mind

Does a brand ninja run stealthily along rooftops and use his skills, elan and enormous weapon to take down assorted bad guys? If so, I'm definitely interested. 😀

Meanwhile, I'm suddenly attracted by the following:

[b]Bandito!

Free mule and moustache.[/b]

The Flying Ox , that's awesome. Cheers dude.

I'm on my way !!

and I believe he's for real too !

He's done it once before on a test run, and brought back a Haircut to prove it works.

That ad is hilarious, might as well say "would be serial killer seeks second victim".

Novel way of selecting a victim I suppose.

🙂

get paid to stare blankly

Evil super villain seeks nemesis

Curry Taster Required, Free Beer.

Ferrari deliverer required South France

I'm on my way !!

and I believe he's for real too !

He's done it once before on a test run, and brought back a Haircut to prove it works.