…I’ve got a spot in my ear.
OUCH!
Pahh...my nose idt blocked.
I just plucked a nostril hair....
ARGH!
Bent a nail back ..... pain indeed!
breathing in foamy toothpaste when its all frothed up in your mouth.
Bursting a spot in your ear is fun though, really loud 'POP'
philconsequence - Member
breathing in foamy toothpaste when its all frothed up in your mouth.
Yeah, yeah, we believe you. Of course it's "toothpaste"....
my foot slipped off my pedal yesterday on my way to work, pedal clanged me right on the shin... GAWD it hurt AND I've got a wound to show for it 🙂
LOL
You have obviously never had sack and crack wax 😉
Pahh. Pedal in the shin? Try that with an SPD. Reduces grown men to tears.
My moustache is killing me
I just plucked a nostril hair....
I do this infrotn of the missus with her tweezers, it makes her eyes water (and me sneeze)
Pfft! You don't know what pain is!!!
I rode too close to some thorny prickly bushes last night. I now have simply frightful scratches down one ankle
I do this infrotn of the missus with her tweezers, it makes her eyes water (and me sneeze)
Your Mrs has nostril hair?
😉
cardo - Member
Bent a nail back ..... pain indeed!
this is the only one that made me wince...
Your Mrs has nostril hair?
possibly, I'd be too affraid to tell her if she did though.
Near fatal paper cut earlier today
i had stingy piss this morning
You can forget your cancer, laxative overdoses, amputated feet and snapped banjo
Did I miss a banjo post on here?
i got toothpaste in my eye once, absolute agony! My mate had to pin me down and wash it out
spawnofyorkshire - Member
i got toothpaste in my eye once, absolute agony! My mate had to pin me down and wash it out
Yeah, yeah, we believe you. Of course it was "toothpaste"....
😀
Sterling efforts Cpt
ski - I posted one a while back.
A mate of mine was "helping himself" in the bath and it all got a tad frenetic. Twang went his banjo string. He screamed. He bled. His mum came running in and thought he'd slashed his wrists.
Ho ho.
😯
the toothpaste+eye=AAAAAHHHHHHHOMMYGODICANT****INSEE/THATHURTSSOMUCC/HHELPMEHELPME/GETSOMETHINGTOWASHITOUT moment was a forfeit in a drinking game. Said mate tried washing it out with vodka at first but that made it worse funnily enough
I ate too much soup for lunch and I now have indegestion.
End of Thread.
speaking of banjo's - my uni housemates went twang at the vinegar strokes when with his mrs one afternoon
Cue lots of screaming and us legging it in to his room to find him sat on the end of his bed crying whilst still wearing a condom with contents that looked vaguely like a raspberry ripple
Just tried to pop a saddle sore. The harder I squeezed the fainter I felt. Going to try lancing it next, once I've got my vision back.
raspberry ripple
Fantastically graphic. I feel like I was there.
I once put 6% hydrogen peroxide solution directly into my eye. I mistook it for my contact lens saline solution. Jeez - my eye slammed shut like a vault door. Absolute agony.
Meh! - I slept funny and have a slightly stiff shoulder!
MTFU all of you.
Fantastically graphic. I feel like I was there.
it's etched in my memory and one of those things you just can't unsee despite years of abusing my brain with alcohol
my jumper is a bit tight under the armpits and its making my arms a little bit tingly and numb
I stood on an upturned plug this morning, and my day hasn't gotten any better 🙁
my jumper is a bit tight under the armpits and its making my arms a little bit tingly and numb
Nasty.
Nasty.
It think I'll warm up a tin of chicken soup, see if that makes me feel better
my mate had a similar injury when a girlfriend polished his staff with more enthusiasm than technique. For reasons unknown he was sporting gentleman's rainwear and also encountered the raspberry ripple effect. I don't know why he shared the story with us, but in a later incident on a lads ski trip on 'home made cocktail night' we concocted one in his honour which included UHT milk and cherry brandy, and was christened the 'Split Frenulum'
Whilst moving a filing cabinet by shuffling it from left to right I managed to trap a nipple in the top drawer and make it bleed. 😕
It think I'll warm up a tin of chicken soup, see if that makes me feel better
Tinned soup? You poor, poor soul!
[i]Whilst moving a filing cabinet by shuffling it from left to right I managed to trap a nipple in the top drawer and make it bleed, [b] honest Doctor[/b][/i]
ftfy
Didn't get injured, but a few weeks after leaving the shower naked the other day and having a shave, I dropped my Mach 3 and had a nervous juggle around the family jewels area as I attempted to catch it on the way down.
Will be wrapping my loins up in a towel immediately on exit from now on.
I did an asparagus piss at the weekend. Not painful, but most unpleasant.
Tinned soup? You poor, poor soul!
Get you, lording it about with your fancy tetra-packed soups, full of identifiable lumps. 🙂
I was late for a flight once and decided to iron my shirt right after stepping out of the shower. Naked. In my rush, I knocked over the iron. The good news is that I didn't burn my nads, the bad news is that I burned my nipple. I feel your pain emmz!
Whilst moving a filing cabinet by shuffling it from left to right I managed to trap a nipple in the top drawer and make it bleed.
Naked furniture moving?
Hmmm...
Honestly Doctor, I was just Hoovering and I slipped and fell and the handle went up my back passage.
I stood up to quick earlier and felt a bit dizzy.
Pretty much ruined my whole afternoon 🙁
I can no longer think of eating rasberry ripple.
