Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target—providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. Once that's accomplished, grasp his hair as close to the scalp as you're able to and yank his head back while using your Ka-Bar combat knife to make a lateral cut across his throat. Make sure you sever both the carotid artery and jugular vein while piercing the windpipe, and press hard; the larynx is a tough, rubbery piece of tissue.
Na, too much hassle Northwind. It's about 30p for a pack of ibuprofen. Same for a cheap choccy treat. Combine the two, over the fence wi it. Job done.
Unfortunately it seems to be a new trend around here too
Buy small yappy dog
Think its fun for a few days
Then leave in back garden from 7am until 11pm and ignore its incessant barking
I, like the OP, can't just switch off and even things like having a shower with the bathroom window open becomes an extremely frustrating experience
The owners are complete tosspots in my book. Its your dog, not mine. Don't inflict it on everyone else that lives here simply because you can't be bothered
I have had dogs in the past and there is no way i could be selfish enough to leave it outside barking, no matter what time of day it was
One of my my neighbours has an annoying small yappy dog (ffs who bred these things anyway, get a proper dog that goes woof not an overgrown rat...) but to be fair they do try and control it (although her shouting "be quiet" or "shut up" all the time is only mildly less annoying than the dog itself). If it got to the stage it was an issue for me and they refused to do anything I think I'd just go an buy an air horn and whenever it barked I'd use the horn (in as close proximity to the dog as I could).
The owners are complete tosspots in my book
Yep but from the sound of it hes an older gent so you can't go messing about (he'll want to, you definitely wont) so he'll be playing up on that as well.
Go down the council noise nusuance unit route- ask them for their advice.
My JRT is a charming little dog who likes to talk
Hmmm... Learning difficulties or dickhead? If the former then we really shouldn't take the piss.
Pudd.. I see where you're coming from.. and it looks like a nice, fluffy place..
But you're barking up the wrong tree in this company..
It is turning into a bit of a dog-pile, isn't it?
OP- you either have to report it or move, assuming that canicide is off the table.
The thing is, becuase of one persons lack of consideration (the dog owners), things just get out of hand.
As is always the way with dog related threads (at least on here anyway).
I accidently spray water over next doors yappy little rats whilst Im cleaning my bike. It doesnt like me being in my garden, going to the recycling bin nor entering the garage. I love dogs but this thing does my head in. Its not even a proper dog, its not big enough.
haha, me too! It's one of the 'crimes' of mine that got reported to the RSPCA... Well that bit them on the arse!I accidently spray water over next doors yappy little rats whilst Im cleaning my bike.
You heartless bastards! What has their dog ever done to you!
(should have been ecotoplasm)
Pudd = Fred?
Na, Fred was less obvious
What about recording the yapping, then playing it back to them on a loop when you are out?
Am I the only one who has successfully managed a peaceful dog noise resolution?
Told the owner it was enough they were shocked and remedied it within the month.
I miss that house, lot to be said for good neighbours.
Good considerate neighbours make a MASSIVE difference. Im really lucky that everybody in my street just gets on with things and shows tolerance and considerance (as do I).
Moving 2 years ago was the best thing I did.
Tossers attempting to evoke an as emptive response is counter productive. Get over youself and learn some tolerance.
Irony lols.
My old Westie cross began barking all the time. Vet said he was suffering a form of dementia, & coupled with his deafness, he was basically constantly forgetting where he was, & who I was.
Is the chaps dog quite old ?
If my dog barks in the garden it's usually because she's playing with my son, or wants to be let back in the house. She's a rescue so training is ongoing. She gets to bark once then that's it any more and I'm down on her hard. I have a responsibility to my neighbours and the dog. Sounds like you need a bit of training Pudd on how to treat and look after pets. I will look out for you on the next Neighbours From Hell.
