[i]One swift punch, and he fell on his arse about 5 feet further back from where he started off. [/i]
Pics or it didn't happen.
Late 80s, nightclub in Portsmouth. It's the done thing you know.
Bloke had groped my mate's bird, like. Bouncers wouldn't do anything so my mate went for him and I went for his big mate. His nose bled, so hopefully it was busted. Nothing for 20 years before that and nothing since.
Although that X6 driver definitely would've got it, jammy bastard 😆
Late 90s. I was riding my motorbike home form work, filtering past crawling traffic when the pick up truck driven by a builder type in his fifties, that I was passing started moving across, pushing me into the oncoming traffic. I could see the driver's face in the mirror. He knew exactly what he was doing. I accelerated past then had to stop in front as there wasn't a big enough gap to go any further. Next thing I know he's nudging my back wheel with the bumper of the truck. I got off my bike went back to the truck to ask what the hell he was trying to prove. When all I got back was abuse I punched him on the side of the face, not as hard as I'd have liked as it was on the limit of my reach. I went back to my bike and he followed me, grabbing me round the neck as I sat back on my bike and started ranting at me. By this time the traffic in the opposite lane was moving faster and my first thought was how easy it would be to kick him across into the path of one of those cars. Eventually after I pointed out how his truck was now holding up the traffic on our side of the road he let go and we went our merry ways.
Like many others last proper fight where I got a punch in was stotting some bully on the head to show him not to. worked well. Other than that I've had a few thrown in my direction but I don't really believe it helps so tend to run away... unless its car drivers doing near death things, but then punching a car doesn't count right? 😉
About 3 years ago, Christmas Eve or maybe the 23rd in Morrison's of all places.
I picked up some sprouts (which I hate) and someone grabbed me from behind and tried to shove me into the display over it. It wasn't even that busy and I'm sure they had some more under the display or out the back but they were the last ones this moron could see and somehow me picking them up was more than a little insulting - he shoved, I turned around the did the stupid Brit thing of trying to apologise and was greeted by a mad looking red faced bloke about 50 years old spiting out insults, he tried to shove me again and with my calves already at the edge I would have gone over so I pulled back and let rip - hit him with a glancing blow at about 4mph - but thankfully it was enough to let him know he wasn't dealing with pussy veg buyer!
I used to have a decent punch in my 20's - 'in the gym' anyway, but I've got a plate in my left wrist which means punching would hurt me more than them and a mangled right elbow which gives me almost no reach - so I'm a 'lover' these days ha ha.
Last year after driving into me the driver got out of his car called me a few names and punched me around the head a bit before driving off. He came back when I was calling the cops and had another go, I wasn't taking any chances this time and beat the shit out of him.
Couldn't sleep for a week with feelings of guilt, technically no reason, he started it, ran a car into me, then punched me, there was witnesses and he got done by the law but I never ever want to hit another human being again, there are no winners.
In Morrisons! Brilliant - Supermarket Rage! 😆
Some arse (builder type again) turning left from the RH lane then started a fight because I didn't make allowances for his illegal move. After the 5th or 6th punch had hit him, he decided it wasn't such a big issue and that he'd like to go on his way (after stopping the bleeding first).
He just saw a bloke in a shirt and thought he was in for an easy ride. I regret being put in the situation, but the look on his face when he realised he'd bitten off more than he could chew. Priceless.
Not sure if I am a good puncher anymore, however I did get into quite a few fights at school and have the souvnier 'broken knuckle' on my left hand from smacking someone. Had to sit at the dinner table as a 15yr old lad nearly crying but having to stifle it in case my dad asked what happened
Used to play football to a high standard. Never started any fights but my style of play meant I was always the one who got punched for some reason. Even my team mates would comment on how they always felt safe when things kicked off because it would be me getting punched.
I know for a fact I can take a good punch. One such incident involved me getting punched by a knuckle head centre forward, I grappled with him and his team mate took a run up and launched me into orbit. I took it and ended up rolling around with the 2 of them. All three of us got sent off and I couldn't eat properly for weeks so I think he may have cracked my jaw.
All good fun though
last time was in a club at Uni, friend (7 stone girl) bumped someone of dance floor ( a bloke).
Who then went to take a swing at her, not proud of this but ended punching him in face not too hard, & then picking him up by the head and chucking him across the dance floor, he got up a couple of times to try and take a swing but just pushed him back over.
Bouncers had waited till it finished to ask us all to leave, quite politly as I think they though I was going to go fully postal.
Not at all proud of this but was 20 seconds of 'flip top head' when saw him going to punch my mate.
Two years ago, a karate hard man, spent a good 5 minutes trying to land a killer kick on me, then he started to flag a bit, so i put one on him, well a few actually. 😀
Probably a different thread, but silly things you got into fights over at school?
Hard to top sprouts in Morrisons, but a kid took one of my cakes in baking class - cue fists flying. I can still remember our 2 friends standing there in stitches at what we were fighting over, then breaking it up because we were all scared of the (female) teacher!
Two weeks ago.
Road rage incident. A guy cut my mother up and then smashed my wing mirror. He became aggressive and came at me, so I belted him.
I ended up with a sore shoulder and pulled a load of muscles in my chest when we started wrestling in the street.
I should have stayed in the car, took down his number plate and driven off. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.
2006 milling contest - Winner 8)
plenty of walls since
Last thing I punched was a car door mirror! Not one of my greatest moments.
Been clouted a few times but strangely it never seemed to do much damage, got punched on the nose by one of the local BNP skins about 20yrs ago on a Xmas Eve in the pub (I was well known by them for my anti fascist activities) & he looked rather upset when all I did was giggle.
Cut me a bit, but the landlady was a vetinary nurse so stitched me up without needing anaesthetic - did a good job too, you can hardly see the scars.
Last punch I remember actually throwing was back in school, had recently come out of hospital after having my feet rebuilt & I still had stitches in & was wearing shoe splints. A friend was threatening/trying to stamp on my feet - he was around 6ft & I was about 4'11". I jumped up in the air & bloodied his nose, not sure who was the most shocked TBH.
long story short .man took bike off my 16 year old nephew while he was riding it, my son phoned me so off i went and to my surprise it was a 40ish year old bloke going hell for leather with my son and other mates following a distance behind telling me which way he was going. when i confronted him the bloke tried to strangle me,so punched him to the ground (around 6 punches). dont feel bad about it in the slightest.sometimes people do deserve a smack
I treat punching like pleasantries.
Can I have a cup of tea, please <thwack!>
Do you have the time? <lamp!>
Oh, hello, Vicar. <bosh!>
*windmills out of thread*
On the topic of punches, this is the funniest thing I've seen all day - granted I've just woken up.
"He's probably more British than me, I'm ****in Australian" 
^^^ NSFW (with the volume up) but good stuff!
Never. Got punched in the back of the head by some drunk chap many years ago, he thought I was someone else, I was also too drunnk to manage to retaliate, and the GFs (sober) dad appeared at the right time and told him to do one. Which he did.
God, even I'm tempted to use the "cool story bro" meme on myself!
at a house party in nottingham about 10 years ago?
some guy nicked our pot, I challenged him as he left he pushed me, I took a swing, he ducked and ****ted me straight in the jaw, went down like a sack of...
He was apparently a youth boxing champ, but thats hear nor there Im a lover, not a fighter
Last night and then Saturday then Monday but that is just training
In an actual fight about 1984
Violence is tragic an almost never the answer to anything other than self defence when all other options are exhausted
Ah the typical shove to find your range and then the big right hand.
as i said violence solves nothing
Dojo, 1984.
[i]A kid tried to steal my dinner money when I was about 13. I punched him, broke his nose and glasses then commenced jumping on his head.
I nearly got expelled. Nobody really cared about bullies in the 80s. Nobody tried to bully me again.[/i]
oooh scary! 😯
I don't think I've ever thrown a punch at anyone other than when we were both wearing boxing gloves.
Having witnessed a young lad die from a single punch I don't think I would resort to any form of violence unless my or someone's life was in danger.
took a bit of a slapping off a gang of lads (probably about 16 years old, I would have been about 32) the other year.
There was maybe a dozen of them, just out for shits and giggles. Even though I've hardly thrown a punch in my life, once the adrenaline kicked in I had to remind myself not to react; they were clearly looking for an excuse to get nasty and it's a notoriously stabby area with a long history of gang violence.
scary and humiliating. only cuts and bruises though. small mercies...
Not for years last time I needed to punch something I got Chewie to do it.
When my son was born and someone in the pub said "congratulations is it yours or did you just take the blame?" .He got kicked out of the pub and I got bought beer for years after because he is an asshole.
Someone road raged me back in the summer when I was cycling with a friend. He came for me and looked stroppy so I knocked him out with a single punch and then volleyed him right in the knackers. Also last Friday I glassed a bouncer in a west end nightclub because he looked at my pint in a funny way.
These comments may well be fictional and I may have never hit any one ever.
I punched a bloke 'cause he spilt my bird.
(Had to make sure I spelled that write)
last one was in march of this year, it resulted in a short stay in hospital to have my knuckle wired back on 😐 (
he was a mess, there were witnesses and I really though I would have been arrested, but him being a right c**t and he seems to always be in trouble didn't pursue it (thank ****) 😳
lots of neighbours say hello and smile at me since Strangely tho, seems fella isn't liked round here much at all
I took a couple of beatings when I was around 16/17 year old for large groups! Not a pleasant experience.doris5000 - Member
took a bit of a slapping off a gang of lads (probably about 16 years old, I would have been about 32) the other year.There was maybe a dozen of them, just out for shits and giggles. Even though I've hardly thrown a punch in my life, once the adrenaline kicked in I had to remind myself not to react; they were clearly looking for an excuse to get nasty and it's a notoriously stabby area with a long history of gang violence.
scary and humiliating. only cuts and bruises though. small mercies...
One was my mate that decided it would be a good idea to ask a group of guys playing fitba if they wanted a photo. i got caught and leathered, wasn't too bad tbh they realised it wasn't me being the wide-o.
The other I was just walking to the shops in another scheme with a lassie, then all of a sudden, people started coming from nowhere and attacking me, I managed to get myself into a chippy and get my back against a wall atleast and limit the beating to a point. I reckon only reason i'm alive is because at the end of the queue to beat me was a guy I went to school with and he managed to stop the ravaged hoards long enough to get me a head start to run like ****. Scariest night of my life tbh.
barely got a punch in either!
The other I was just walking to the shops in another scheme with a lassie, then all of a sudden, people started coming from nowhere and attacking me, I managed to get myself into a chippy and get my back against a wall atleast and limit the beating to a point. I reckon only reason i'm alive is because at the end of the queue to beat me was a guy I went to school with and he managed to stop the ravaged hoards long enough to get me a head start to run like ****. Scariest night of my life tbh.barely got a punch in either!
When he was about 16, my brother started or at least helped to instigate a fight with about half a dozen squaddies, he floored one of them before the rest of them piled in and started kicking him when he was down.
He still to this day thinks that it was hilariously funny.....which I don't really get.
Many years ago I witnessed my brother being paralysed during a Thai boxing bout. I knew the fight was a bad idea as I saw his opponent kicking a concrete post just before the fight.
I swore revenge, and ended up being adopted by an old coach in the jungle who taught me to fight.
He dropped things from a great height onto my stomach to strengthen my stomach muscles and I ended up kicking a banana tree to pieces. I got off with his daughter who was hot after I protected her from some local gangsters who were extorting money from her.
One time he took me to a local bar and got me drunk, and told the locals that I was looking for trouble, I beat them all up.
Eventually, I fought the champion who paralysed my brother - needless to say I won and got the girl!
A couple of months ago.... Took the family and dog out for a gentle ride and some idiots dog attacked mine. I tried to ride between the two and the bloke pushed me off my bike, so I swung for him, just after that mrsvader got in the way so it didn't go further.
I had a go at a pensioner (a big, ugly, tough, farmer type though....ahem) last year who ran my wife and I right off the road when we were on our tandem. I was pissed off enough at being run off the road but his added comments of; we should ride elsewhere as the road was too narrow for bikes [i]and[/i] cars, I looked a ****t in lycra (truth hurts) and some horrible unnecessary personal shit about my wife made me see red.
Luckily, I just knocked his glasses off with a mainly air girly punch before Mrs Boblo brought order to the situation.
I'm no fighter.
Do you have the time? <lamp!>
Last time (maybe 12 years ago) i hit someone was a bit like this.
Standing out of the rain one evening waiting for a taxi, some guy shelters beside me and asks 'do you have a light?' As i look down to my pocket i kinda see something heading towards me. Turns out it was his fist. Knocked my glasses off and broke my nose, sending blood everywhere. Cool i thought as it was the first time my nose had ever bled, then i lost it a little. After a kick to the ding-dings had no apparent affect i clubbed him to the ground. All he could mumble was 'good dig mate'. This made me even more upset so i did what anyone would do and picked him up by one arm and one leg and skimmed him down the road (known around these parts as a burlie 😀 )
Never punched never been punched. In a fight club way I'd like to have a fight but really, don't think it would e fun.
Euro - MemberDo you have the time? <lamp!>
Last time (maybe 12 years ago) i hit someone was a bit like this.
Standing out of the rain one evening waiting for a taxi, some guy shelters beside me and asks 'do you have a light?' As i look down to my pocket i kinda see something heading towards me. Turns out it was his fist. Knocked my glasses off and broke my nose, sending blood everywhere. Cool i thought as it was the first time my nose had ever bled, then i lost it a little. After a kick to the ding-dings had no apparent affect i clubbed him to the ground. All he could mumble was 'good dig mate'. This made me even more upset so i did what anyone would do and picked him up by one arm and one leg and skimmed him down the road (known around these parts as a burlie )
Hey, that reminds of a night I picked a fight with some lanky prick!! He ended up giving me a burlie?? (what the **** is a burlie?)
Been years, I'm not a fighter. Last proper knock-down fight I was in, I technically won but since I broke my own hand on his face I think probably I came off worse 😳 Perfect metaphor for streetfighting in general
[i]Last proper knock-down fight I was in, I technically won but since I broke my own hand on his face I think probably I came off worse[/i]
I had that problem as a teenager, twice.
Punched another kid at school hard enough to knock them over but ended up with my hand in plaster.
Positively Pyrrhic.
Where's surroundedtrolling****yman, I'd have thought this thread would have been right up his street.
Anyway, nearly two years ago.
It is many years since I've punched anyone. Since hurting my hand I've switched to using elbows instead.
About 5 years ago. Often for a bit. Usually about 10 seconds before I got knocked on my arse.
Drink completely to blame.
I punch with my groin. Once knocked down a wall with it and punched a hole through steel plating. Awesome power.
