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doffed cap to the great ape
+1. You sir are a legend 😀
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(Isnt Google search wonderful?)
😆
Ah- here we go Part 2:
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1. Face Forward
2. Don't Laugh
I had a friend who loved to fart. Whenever he did he always got this really satisfied look on his face.
One day I was sitting across from him when I heard him let one rip. His look of satisfaction suddenly changed to a wide eyed look of shock.
Me: "Followed through?"
Him: "Yup"
I was at the Goodwood Festival of Speed, several sheets to the wind, I was at the urinal when mediocre Formula 1 driver Olivier Panis stood next to me.
I glanced at him, looked down and suppressed a giggle
The infantile panis/penis scenario tickled my humour. He thought I was laughing at his undertray.
Tricky.
I was kept in hospital overnight on tuesday , the farting in the overnight ward between 2 and 3 am sounded like a recital of Paul Mcartneys Frog chorus. Awesome.
I'm suddenly reminded of a mate who had a phobia of being assaulted whilst pissing, he felt very vulnerable, so would always leave his belt and top button done up and just undo his fly, so he could defend himself without his trousers falling down. I can't get the crying bald man out without undoing everything..
You must NEVER talk at the urinal, even in this circumstance.
Talking is fine as long as you're on an even footing, i.e. speeking in the que is fine, and speeking at the pulpit is fine, and while washing your hands, but never between them.
Used to work in a well known outdoor shop in Newcastle. One of my mates was serving a well to do lady and her teenage daughter (recently collected from public school and still in posh uniform). They were trying on walking boots and my mate returned with a different size and sat down on one of those little wooden trying-on stools with the slopey front that you only get in shoe shops. You can guess the rest - he let one slip in error, a right window rattler... Hard wooden surface emphasised matters. He went beetroot, we just about wet ourselves and dived for various store rooms and stock cupboards to recover. She never did buy any boots...
I can't get the crying bald man out without undoing everything..
Hard to locate, is he?
Of course it is you fud.