Loud sneezer here and a dad. A find a good sneeze is often followed by a fart these days which makes me laugh out loud. The second sneeze and fart while laughing can be quite a tricky business!
Best thread this week.
Every so often I'll get a sneezing fit for maybe 5 minutes, seems to be related to temperature regulation as having a glass of cold water or opening the window usually brings it to an end.
However, one evening my wife prematurely brought it to a conclusion by shouting "Pineapples!" just as I was about to sneeze. She'd heard that the confusion caused in the sneezers mind by this caused the sneeze to short circuit. And it did.
The torment I went through that evening, just about to sneeze and unable to follow through, as it were. Torture
as an acute allergic rhinitis sufferer with a dodgy back/neck sneezing and piles, sneezing is often painful, frequently messy, and always as loud as a airhorn.
That reads like the worlds worst Tinder profile
Especially the neck sneezing
I read this more as an inevitable progression.
dodgy back leads to neck sneezing which in turn causes sudden onset piles?
If I don't sneeze loudly, and kind of stifle it inwardly, the pressure makes my ears turn inside out.
I distrust anyone who is able to do those weird "abbreviated" sneezes: sort of neck-spasm, followed by a quiet-ish "chhhh" sound (I assume as their skull tries to retain the pressure generated by their sneeze).
Mostly because I don't understand how that works. I feel like if I tried to "trap" a sneeze on it's way out like that, the pressure would escape some other way..... and I'd rather do a loud/normal sneeze than shit myself in public. I assume those are the two options.
😂 This thread is superb!
I come from a family of interesting sneezers - mostly multiple sneezers. My sneeze used to be the only sensible one of the family, until I had my sternum sawed in half and stapled back together some years ago, and I learnt to protect it by letting my sneeze do whatever it wanted. It's now a ridiculous cartoon sneeze which changes its exact lyrical and rhythmic characteristics depending on who knows what. I do try to wrestle it into a more conventional format in company, but at home it's more comfortable to just let go.
Let the sneeze free. I’m convinced that trying to strangle a sneeze or fart will result in irreparable damage in the long run. When people die from an unknown causes it’s probably from years of holding in or trying to smother them.
Loud sneezer here.
Gazhungerdiet.
Do you say ‘A bit more choke and that would have started’ every single time you fart?
You have to have an alternative when "Pull my finger" wears thin with the kids.
It’s an affectation, same as not liking The Beatles, owning a dog or drinking coffee instead of tea.
Or, indeed, professing not to like Line of Duty.
Massive echoey empty space where my...
This explains so much
😉
professing not to like Line of Duty.
I'm so confused by this.
Anyway. It's so much more relieving to just let is go and have a good old release. Although possible, trying to keep it in will just end up popping an eyeball or hernia.
no time to read all this now, but has anyone mentioned the increased risk of soiling yourself? if the pressure isn’t released freely and noisily at the face, there is the risk that it may come out below.
if it’s not soiling yourself, it’s definitely narcissism.
🙂
I'm not suggesting holding anything in, least of all a fart. I'm British. I appreciate the sound of ripping sailcloth as much as anyone.
I'm merely suggesting that one may sneeze freely without emitting a sound like a tortured clown.
I’m merely suggesting that one may sneeze freely without emitting a sound like a tortured clown.
This is what toxic masculinity looks like.
Gentlemen, be free to express yourselves.
….is it a Dad thing?
Nope my wife is the most theatrical sneezer I have ever met, to the point that it's one of her worst habits.
The build up, the "Aaaarrhhhchoooo!" And the subsequent dramatic rolling back and fourth of the neck and faux shocked expression as if it wasn't expected, all just making it more annoying...
I have a friend with a sneeze like a thunderclap. There's no build-up, no 4-minute warning to take cover or hide under a mattress. Just an instantaneous and devastating expulsion of immense sound for an immeasurably brief moment of time. Like the big bang, or a glimpse into an alternative reality consisting only of MAX VOLUME straight in your left ear for a nanosecond. Then its done, but you can see the shockwave travel out in crowded spaces as a kind of Mexican-flinch of people, a ripple in the pond of normality.
And then his wife smacks him round the head.
On the other hand, I tend to stifle sneezes in public as I'm scared of involuntarily ejaculating a globule of sputum in the direction of some unfortunate. Although I'm cautious of doing this since reading on the BBC of some guy who managed to split his sarcophagus restraining a sneeze.
I have a friend with a sneeze like a thunderclap. There’s no build-up, no 4-minute warning to take cover or hide under a mattress. Just an instantaneous and devastating expulsion of immense sound for an immeasurably brief moment of time. Like the big bang, or a glimpse into an alternative reality consisting only of MAX VOLUME straight in your left ear for a nanosecond. Then its done, but you can see the shockwave travel out in crowded spaces as a kind of Mexican-flinch of people, a ripple in the pond of normality.
Do we know each other? Am I your friend?
guy who managed to split his sarcophagus restraining a sneeze.
That must have been quite an undertaking!
split his sarcophagus
hmmm... these are not the words I was looking for
guy who managed to split his sarcophagus restraining a sneeze.
That must have been quite an undertaking!
This needed recognition!
The tuby bit in your throat..
Arsophogas?
always been a loud sneezer before sprogs. Also can't do single sneezes- always do two.
I always add a Michael Jackson/Jackass style "he-hee" at the end of my very loud sneezes. It really gets people upset.
He/Hee is also my preferred pronoun combo of choice.
