Break the shower and bus/drive in for the week until it's repaired. Hopefully he will find a new routine. Regardless it sounds like it will inconvenience him more than you.
I await the "what to do about the smelly guy at work who hasn't showered for a week" thread with interest.
tried talking in a nice half jokey way; don't be such a tight git etc and did your ride or run in today?! , but he is on of those people who will not change their views or have their view changed.
No, not a jokey talk, a serious, here is the problem, here's what needs to be done kind of talk.
In the morning before you get dressed wrap yourself up in clingfilm, leaving just a small gap to breath through your nose. When you get to work, just unwrap yourself, like a tear off on goggles. You will be all sparkly and clean without a need for shower.
No need to thank me.
Tell him that there is a new 10 minute rule - after 10 mins you will open the door and join him in the shower.
That should have him in and out a bit quicker, or alternatively, might be the start of a beautiful relationship.
hide his trousers so he has to work all day in his boxer shorts.
leave a anonymous ransom note stating their return is subject to him promising to take less time in the shower
keep posting on a internet forum rather than talk to him, bound to sort it.
get him sacked by telling your boss he stole your sweets
Personally I'd be going down the Bleach mixed with Ammonia route. He'll get out sharpish after about 10 seconds of exposure. How long can you hold your breath for 😆
Pull his cord (no pun) when he's about to rinse his hair.
Then, dangle your makeshift cord (no pun), that he cant quite reach, in its place.
He will then stumble blindly out of the shower, grasping desperately for the cord. Then, assist him in his stumbling, by guiding him to an adjacent fire-door & onto the car park, whereupon he will be arrested for exposing himself.
Tea bag in the shower head.
(Not tea bagging his head)
You could always locate the breaker for the shower and flick it after he's been in there for 10 minutes. Just keep doing it every day.
Make friends with the building manager/FM.
The white strings of goop in the tray aren't left over bits of shower gel either, it's left over liquid silk.
ANY bloke who spends longer than 15 mins in the shower is w@nking, Fact!
[s]Tea bag[/s] food dye in the shower head
when do the cleaners clean the showers? if it's not overnight then make sure you're the last one in the office, go curl one out in the tray as a little surprise for him. He will disappear off in disgust and you can then use the shower. As it was your deposit just toe it down the plughole and rinse off your feet.
After a few days of this he'll stop even attempting to use the shower.
Or you'll get fired for sh*tting in the shower
ANY bloke who spends longer than 15 mins in the shower is w@nking, Fact!
If this is true maybe try talking dirty to him through the door, he may be finished sooner.
Just barge in there & own him with a pair of bummers.
he ALWAYS eats everything! but especially mini eggs, that I left on my desk!
Sack him, no cuddles just sack him.
you shouldn't be leaving them on your desk..put them in your locker and leave the key in the top drawer of your desk
he ALWAYS eats everything! but especially mini eggs, that I left on my desk!
Easy answer. Plug the mini eggs or see how many you can get under the "hood". Take pictures of plugging/hooding. Put eggs on desk. Email pictures to offender once the eggs have gone.
Easy answer. Plug the mini eggs or see how many you can get under the "hood". Take pictures of plugging/hooding. Put eggs on desk. Email pictures to offender once the eggs have gone.
And I thought the toeing your own cack down the plughole sounded wrong you had to go and top it. Not literally obviously.
Although you could do that, crimp one off in the shower and put some mini eggs on it. See if they get eaten.
Although that might work.(Not tea bagging his head)
Hehe this turning out to be a very entertaining thread!
Is there something you could fit into the shower head like one of those blue urinal blocks?
How about barricade the door when he's inside?
My shower routine including lag for 1st thing in the morning, from full lycra to full change is probably about 12 minutes, maybe a touch more
After 20 mins of waiting take his clothes and run them through the office shredder.
Sneakily turn on the basin hot tap after 5 minutes and run away.
perchypanther - Member
He's in there having a quick shower, washing yesterdays clothes in the shower tray ........and crying.
From which eye?
Hide his clothes and crack the fire alarm whilst he's in there...
OP, is this one shower in a multi-person changing room, or one-person locked room with shower and changing bench?
40 mins changing, showering and froo-frooing is beyond excessive, but 40 minutes in the actual shower is baffling.
All this over one shower, we're currently moaning because we're down to six showers in our locker room due to the other four being refurbished. 😀
Get the building manager to run fire alarm drills when he's in there. He'll either get passed off with having to come out or disciplined for not following procedure.
It's a pain, but not a disaster - we have a floor of IT people who think it's ok to CTW and not shower at all. Sometimes they use meeting rooms and they need fumigated afterwards.
