[Closed] Shouted at by walker - what whitty response should I have come up with?

'Actually you are you are an environmental vandal....'

lordswood?

"I do hope you're picking up after those dogs.£1000 fine if you don't"

ignore. don't let it get to you,

I think the "yes I know, silly isn't it" from cheeky trails rules is a good answer

'You do know this is a footpath'
'[s]Really ok?[/s]'

Sorry.

"Your face is an environmental vandal."

lordswood?

Yep. Lady with the beagals (lovely dogs) in fact I'm pretty sure I know where she lives too.

Pretty sure she is the one who occasionally puts logs across the trails, which is normally fine, until I got taken out by chicken wire last year....

Pedaling slowly uphill, lovely evening, [b]good tunes on[/b], happy days

'Actually you are you are an environmental vandal

take the earphones out 😉

"funny, I see hoof marks. that makes it a bridleway"

in the NF ?

tell em you're a personal friend of Henry the 8th and he lets you in

Ed: Lordswood - say you thought it was a cycle path, what with all the mopeds, broken glass AND DOG SHIT in there

Sara got stopped by a old bloke last year along a stretch of path by a river (it was a footpath). In the end she asked him whether or not he'd ever been fisted.

Ok, so not exactly Shakespeare, but it was funny, and the look on his face!

I would've said something along the lines of, "givvus a kiss darlin"

Proper LOL at emsz 🙂

take the earphones out

Nah, just turn it up loud enough to drown out the moaning.

emsz - that is brilliant.

Maybe thinking about it I should have shown her the litter I'd picked up from the trails left by others.

I completely understand if she decide to have a moan at the scrots on motorcros bikes who occasionally tear around, but a lonely cheery mountain biker?!

And actually now you say it I'm pretty sure there is/was horseshoe prints on the trail. I believe locals call it the horseman trail (runs along the motorway down to tanners brook)

I don't think I could ever ask someone if they'd been fisted before no matter how rude they are!!!

I usually ask which actual law I'm breaking and then say I'm just establishing prior use.

shes a nobody I wouldnt even stop to discuss her issues. Its a free world.

I would've said something along the lines of, "givvus a kiss darlin"

This kind of approach, I find, is the best and most effective at disarming your adversary. They are stopped in their tracks and just don't quite know how to respond. they're expecting you to get all arsey, but you behave the opposite, and it' really throws them.

Some woman was having a go at me once, I let her have her little rant, then just said 'you look really sexy when you're angry'.

She was really fighting not to smile. Had to maintain the serious face, but was really struggling. 😀

I usually don't bother saying hi, just smile and nod, it prevents them having an "in".

If you were on a footpath she kind of has a point doesn't she?

mother! oh god mother! I'm lost!! (nuzzle)

If you were on a footpath she kind of has a point doesn't she?

Not really. First of all she was an old hag, and secondly she didn't even have a bike.

If you were on a footpath she kind of has a point doesn't she?

No, because the two statements she made other than that is was a footpath, they're both bollocks.

brooess - Member

If you were on a footpath she kind of has a point doesn't she?

Shhh, we're not supposed to be nice to other countryside users or EVER admit we could possibly be in the wrong.

You're supposed to say that you came up with something witty, cruel and cutting, even if, in reality, you only thought of it hours later.

Getting along with horseriders and walkers, especially old ones is sooooo last century.

make up a rap on the spot about being an Environmental Vandal and all the tough times you had growing up in the suburbs, and riding your bike is your only real freedom and escape from a terrible life of cake addiction and blind consumerism.

or make the devils horns "breakin the law breakin' the law".

"Your face is an environmental vandal."

🙂

I know exactly the lady you mean, takes those dogs on the saem walk everyday, same time no matter what. Is that her?

Me, leaning on crossbar of bike, waiting for walker to pass: "Good afternoon"

Walker: "There's no bikes here"

Me, looking down at bike in a confused manner: "Really? I thought I set out on one, what's this then?"

Walker looks completely confused, I ride of chuckling. Good outcome for me, and unless she got too wound up, didn't really affect her either.

But yes, cheekytrails' "really, how silly" wins every time I am given the opportunity.

seems he did try to be nice though rusty, but she fancied a row (or just possibly a fisting?)

make up a rap on the spot

make up a rap on the spot about being an Environmental Vandal

This made me smile, now I can use my frustration to pretend to be Vanilla ice 🙂

Charlie - yep same women, first time she has ever given me abuse, though she has moaned at mates before.

Hey ho, can't be long before she pops her clogs, I'll still be riding 'her' footpath...

oooh, wait - One "I" prepared earlier

It's environmentally whack, so presenting my attack: I'll brighten up your shack, I'm down by law and that's a fact

Chorus could be something like -

I'm an environmental vandal, in my shimano spd sandals, I rip up the trails and make your face go pales.....

Errr....I'm definitely wasted in IT 🙂

My reply would be, ''If I'm breaking the law you had best call the Police, ask them to scramble the helicopter!''

Charlie - yep same women, first time she has ever given me abuse, though she has moaned at mates before.

Hey ho, can't be long before she pops her clogs, I'll still be riding 'her' footpath..

Yeh, just told her about you falling in the stream, she laughed like a drain! Still won't stop!

Just smile broadly and have a little laugh in your voice whatever you say. Some people are just miserable and there is nothing you can do about it. You being happy infuriates them.

it is a bit like getting out your car to explain to someone why their driving was .No one will ever thank you for your input so there is little point. I either say silly isn't it , ignore them or say i am simonfbarnes and I will ride where I please[ works best wehn said in unison by a group of you as you just get a confused look] depending on how arsed I can be.

Yeh, just told her about you falling in the stream, she laughed like a drain! Still won't stop!

RAAAAWWWWARRRRGHHHH

seems he did try to be nice though rusty, but she fancied a row (or just possibly a fisting?)

Some people are just idiots - doesn't mean we have to react in the same way.

Yes, I know the OP reacted politely, but some of the attitudes on here do us (you know, the collective 'us' as we are perceived by other countryside users) no favours at all.

I've seen some really bad behaviour by cyclists towards horseriders and walkers over the last few years - the increasing popularity of our hobby seems to be attracting some people who just don't know how to share the trails with others.

Sometimes, I almost hope the next time someone comes out with a nasty, vicious, petulant remark to a walker with a politely presented valid point, they have their bike rammed so far up their arse that they'll have to reach down their throat to drop their seat post.
Might teach them some manners.

And yes, I do do cheeky, don't we all?

But I tend to abide by the cheeky trails guidelines, which seem sensible and designed to minimise any potential for confrontation or
misunderstanding on either side.

as i said, nod and smile. or, better still

RS the voice of the righteous

Ranting ramblers who are always selectively deaf on your approach from behind-

'where's your bicycle bell'

.... Same place as your rear view mirror!!

"when did you get voted in as sheriff"

One I've been saving up and not had a chance to use yet...

"This is a footpath, you shouldn't be cycling here"
"Are you in the Ramblers Association ?"
"Yes"
Well, think of me cycling along here as a one man modern day re-enactment of the Kinder Trespass"

In the end she asked him whether or not he'd ever been fisted

Nice response. I'll modify that for the next time an old lady asks me if I'm aware I'm riding on a footpath. 'Have you ever been anally penetrated!' and then ride off chuckling.....

Now that might be a reason to call the police, and I'll be on the register in seconds flat.

Seriously. Be nice but firm with these people.