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We have just transformed to an 'Agile' business. Now, in principle, I have zero issue with how they want to manage projects to change stuff for the better*, but please, FTLOG, can we find who invented the ridiculous 'language' associated with it (Release Train Engineer (Casey Jones??); Scrum; Scrum Master; Lean Portfolio; Enterprise - I could go on) and punch them in the face every time one of these words/phrases is used.** Oh, and can we please stop being so rabid about the 'correct' use of terminology???????
* there will no doubt be times where this is not the case
** apologies to any Agile coaches; RTEs; Scrum Masters etc.
😛
Oh, whilst I'm ranting, this too:
‘We need to identify the art of the possible’.
🤮
Scrum; Scrum Master; Lean Portfolio; Enterprise – I could go on)
Coming from the dev world the agile speak is my only compromise. At least Srum Master is a defined role which is different to your usual project manager/team leader roles in traditional teams. Having said that developers are way too religious about scrum/kanban/SAFe etc. I usually tell people I follow the GSD methodology and everyone seems to nod in agreement.
I especially like it if managers use the term 'fail fast'. It's a perfect excuse to write off something that's too hard. 'I'm sorry but I've reached what I believe is an unresolvable block (ie my brain) on that task and suggest we try something else'.
Coming from the dev world the agile speak is my only compromise
Oh, in the Dev world I get it. Some of it makes real genuine sense, 'RTE' excepted. Problem is, the vast majority of colleagues in our world/business don't have anything to with dev ops in any way, shape or form. 😂
Edit: maybe this is why my immediate team liken me Victor Meldrew 🤔🤣 (cos I'm the oldest only obvs...)
Double edit:
We had strategic pillars 3 years ago. Now we positively impacting culture and results and are on a lean journey to true value stream implementation. We are becoming more focused, more defined, and more data-drive
For a moment I thought we worked for the same company 😂
In our school we now have "unseen observations" which, having been shot down for asking, are not self evaluations. Although they follow the self evaluation framework.
I reached that age where in yesterday's improvement team meeting I was congratulated on not winding the chair up. It was pointed out that that was only because I said nothing.
Process:
1. Decide which people you want to lose.
In a previous job, a new unneeded department was created consisting of 4 people that were 'promoted sideways' too.
It was very confusing as they were doing work that other departments already had processes for.
All became clear when they were all layed off about 12 months later.
That's right... The department was created purely as a vehicle to get rid of few marked men.
My boss was Eton, Oxford, my boss twice in different companies, now owns half of a county.
It's true, he really spoke like the opening post, I confirm noone understood a word he said we all just nodded in agreement. Emperor's clothes, I m sure his bosses did the same.
We used to do cracking impressions of him.
Those 'horizons' sound like new 'pieces' or 'lenses'.
"the piece around.." or "the ... piece."- something related to a project or a reference to some work
"when seen through a different lens" or "the various lenses we're viewing with" - another way of looking at it / different KPIs
*eye roll*
About the redundancy / consultation terms thing (sorry, piece)
Consultations often end with no one leaving the company.
I have never seen that happen.
We will turn this project into a sprint..
I walked out.
I’ll be honest, I saw this shit coming when the elephants were first mentioned.
If you know, you know.
In our school we now have “unseen observations”
Do they hide in a cupboard?
I'm in the process of being TUPEd. My heart sank a little when I got to the slide that read "Company Values." Not that there was anything wrong with the values themselves so much as, WTF is the point of them as a concept at all? This new place has fewer than 100 employees.
At my current place we've been through several iterations of Values and it's all the same twaddle in different pants.