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[Closed] Porn filters - how not to discuss it with the wife

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There was a complete knob'ish debate on that silly Jeremy Vine R2 "me, me, me" show yesterday prattling on about this, to be fair to JV he did put some logical questions to "call me Dave" to which "CMD" could only answer "erm, no not like that, like this" & "no, it's upto the ISP's to put the filters on"
Well thought out idea Dave, thanks for your input 🙄


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 10:26 pm
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😀 some excellent stuff here

Cheers stw

EDit: to be clear I'm thanking the stw massiv not postong as them

Slainte Rob


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 10:50 pm
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What! There's porn on the internet??? The hours I've wasted searching under hedges for stashes of damp razzles....

Wonder if they will enforce that for business, used to cost us £10K a year to stop staff being unnecessarily exposed to inappropriate material


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:00 pm
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Nowadays even goat porn is big budget and HD.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:05 pm
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Simply explain that you have certain needs that she is not fulfilling, and that she has a choice- either you can fulfil those needs using the internet, or she can up her game. That'll resolve the issue.


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:08 pm
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Nowadays even goat porn is big budget and HD.

more like no budget!


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:08 pm
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http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/3072021.stm


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:14 pm
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I can foresee a late night conversation with Talk Talk customer services...

"And now I'm having to have proper sex with girls because I can't yank meself off around the clock"


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:22 pm
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I reckon this will be a choice on the ISP's automated phone line. Press 5 if you are a w****r.


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:26 pm
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I've been thinking about this after camerons inability to denounce page 3 on radio 4 yesterday. The internet has effectivly made and broken the porn industry. As HD cameras become domestic goods, anyone can shoot good quality films, which with increasing broadband takeup can be effectivlel streamed or downloaded and shared for free. No one pays for porn. It has become less of a commodity and more of a household product, it is, to coin a phrase, the new smoking.

now, what if a major studio offered the tories a lot of money to ban internet grot? suddenly DVD sales go through the roof, "adult shops" start increasing turnover, porn becomes a paid for industry again.... prohibition could be very good for business.


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:38 pm
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Simply explain that you have certain needs that she is not fulfilling, and that she has a choice- either you can fulfil those needs using the internet, or she can up her game. That'll resolve the issue

Its a brave man that takes that approach....!


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:46 pm
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Im so glad im not hetrosexual in a monogamous relationship, I really am....

What's that got to do with it? I am heterosexual in a monogamous relationship, and we both decided right away that there was no sodding way we were letting David Cameron and the Daily Wail lecture us on morality.


 
Posted : 23/07/2013 11:58 pm
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Some simple methods
1) it really won't work so just ignore it
2) it will block hundreds of sites you would normally look at & the daily mails celebrity bikini pics
3) just unblock it - the bill probably won't come addressed to That nasty pervert @

I would imagine STW is now on the list due to the topics discussed recently and hopefully the bastion of moral crusading that is mumsnet for it's blatent pornographic threads about Centre Parks


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 12:07 am
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But in simple terms how would it stop this?

New York City mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner, who was forced to resign from Congress over a sexting scandal, has admitted sending more lewd texts and photographs to a young woman.

According to news website The Dirty, Mr Weiner, 48, used the name "Carlos Danger" to contact the woman on Facebook and establish an online relationship with her which involved the exchange of intimate photographs.


http://www.abc.net.au/news/2013-07-24/weiner-bid-for-ny-mayor-seat-hit-by-new-sex-scandal/4839518

Thats right darling, if they turn the grot filter on it's fine I will just make a fake facebook profile and swap pics with other strangers online.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 12:13 am
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What's that got to do with it?

I think the idea was to sneer at heterosexuals in a monogamous relationships for effect. And of course she is allowed to do that - anyone saying "I'm so glad I'm not a homosexual" would expect to receive considerable criticism.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 12:17 am
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If your wife has a problem with you looking at porn you're with the wrong woman or she doesn't know you at all. My wife understands that men have a very primitive urge to crack off at least once/twice a week minimum. There are certain times of month where a wife is not willing (& neither is the man either for that matter ewww) to fulfill those urges, during that time a man must see to himself or risk explosion in a salty sticky mess!


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 12:20 am
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compositepro - Member
Would like to see a graph of UK Internet traffic volume before and after they turn that on!
Get in!!! a geographical map of where all the real w@nkers are

There'll be very large clusters around various government and civil service establishments.
It's already common knowledge that IP address searches show that lots of illegal downloading of grot and music takes place in government departments.
The same people who've been trying to introduce Internet control, encouraged by the Americans, at the behest of Hollywood.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 12:24 am
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What's that got to do with it? I am heterosexual in a monogamous relationship, and we both decided right away that there was no sodding way we were letting David Cameron and the Daily Wail lecture us on morality.

Plus one.

Not sure Cameron is in a position to lecture on anyone's morality.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 7:47 am
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very primitive urge to crack off at least once/twice a day

Fixed that for you


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 7:48 am
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From Horatios link


They found those who had ejaculated the most between the ages of 20 and 50 were the least likely to develop the cancer.

Right then, I've got 30min before I have to leave for work.

*spits on palms


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 7:53 am
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Can't imagine being married to a woman who didn't know/got upset about me watching porn, surely people (except religious idiots) are more enlightened these days...


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 7:55 am
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 Drac
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Im so glad im not hetrosexual in a monogamous relationship, I really am....

I'm glad I'm heterosexual and in a monogamous relationship. I watch porn I'd be a fool to think my wife didn't know or care given at times she's watched it with me. So what's your point?


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:10 am
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Im so glad im not hetrosexual in a monogamous relationship, I really am....

Taking the not trying to be offended point of view there are heaps of posts on here with blokes looking for passes to go riding, sneaking bike purchases past their wives, copping a heap of stick for doing something then complaining about it here. The stereotype of the whipped man hiding from 'er indoors is probably alive and well enough to poke fun at.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:15 am
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Ahhh, that's better.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:17 am
 Drac
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Damn it Mike I never thought of the weak ones who post on here about such things.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:23 am
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Hang on a minute? There's porn on the internet?! 😯


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:42 am
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It'll not happen.

In the same way they u-turned on the minumum charge for a unit of alcohol, too many people in high-up places (including MPs) will lose out, so the government will change their mind again...

If it does, its back to keeping an eye out for hedgerow-razzle...


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 9:29 am
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Is it just me, or is the creation of a database which says which major political figures like to download a bit of porn just asking for trouble? Instant hacking/paying somebody at the ISPs target.

It's also a political minefield, as every MP will have to answer the question as to whether they have turned the filter off, so they'll either have to not watch any porn, lie, or admit in public that they watch a load of porn.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 9:51 am
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I'm pushing for the discrimination angle. This law will discriminate against people who like traditional porn with cocks and things while in the meantime, people who like rubbing off to a nicely shaved poodle will be able to continue unfettered. I'll see you at the European halls of justice.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 10:00 am
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this thread is cracking me up thought I'd share I with the missus but I think I'll keep this one to myself lest she get any ideas


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 1:41 pm
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You don't see so much of that these days, porn in bushes. Or bushes in porn, for that matter.

(C) Jimmy Carr.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 2:22 pm
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LOL @ piemonster.. 🙂


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 3:55 pm
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I've shared this thread with my Mrs (a mums netter) and she thought it was hilarious. But as for freedom in the country. ... Since when have we turned into China ffs?


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 5:06 pm
 hora
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Cheers for that binners 😀 Quagmire reminds me of a less randy version of myself


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:18 pm
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Do people really have such a problem with this, or are they just looking for things to complain about ?

Google safe search was set to "on" by default.

A few clicks and a password and it was turned off.

Job done.

I didn't complain about censorship or make out I was living in North Korea, I just turned off the safe search.

That's all we are talking about here. You log in, you make the settings suit what you want, you log out again.

FFS its hardly difficult.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:20 pm
 Drac
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But as for freedom in the country. ... Since when have we turned into China ffs?

Well given you can talk about it on the internet then we still haven't.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:24 pm
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Nealglover, rough day at work?


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:28 pm
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& neither is the man either for that matter ewww
Never gonna be a Hells Angel then Jekkyl? Mrs Sandwich has said "WIMP" rather loudly in my ear on seeing your post.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:31 pm
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Do people really have such a problem with this, or are they just looking for things to complain about ?

The filtering of things like kiddie 'porn' is a non-story. Most UK ISPs already do that, and have done for about ten years (google "IWF"). So given that this is a non-issue, why mention it at all? Misdirection?

If the government can filter your network traffic, it's trivial for them to monitor it. Think about that for a minute.

The opt-out approach is problematic; it's not a great leap from "I'd like you to leave my Internet connection alone" to "here's a list of perverts and people we can't trust."


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:33 pm
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@nealg - no this is very very different from Google safe search.

The government - by their own admission and by the admission of the ISP's - told them they *must* implement these measures otherwise they would bring in new laws accordingly.

When a government starts making threats to ISP's about how they provide internet services to the public that is a slippery slope.

They have already mentioned banning sites about self harming and hate speech, the latter of which really concerns me as that is full blown censorship with a legal and / or technical framework for a government to decide what is considered hate speech and for the ISP's to then filter it. That is a dangerous position to be in.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:40 pm
 hora
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I think any bloke 18-30 who doesnt opt in is either getting it on a epic scale or weird. So theres your weirdo register.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:41 pm
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If the government can filter your network traffic, it's trivial for them to monitor it. Think about that for a minute.
The opt-out approach is problematic; it's not a great leap from "I'd like you to leave my Internet connection alone" to "here's a list of perverts and people we can't trust."

All they are doing is asking for (telling?) a filter that already a sits to be set to "on" by default.

And letting you turn it off if you want to.

Some ISP's and mobile providers already do it anyway, I really can't see an issue with it.

It's not that different from putting the grot mags on the top shelf at the petrol station, its not that you can't have them, or that there are any controls or censorship in place. It's just that they are not in your immediate eyeline if you are not interested in looking at them.

But if you do want to, just reach up and get one (turn off the filter)


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 6:48 pm
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It's not that different from putting the grot mags on the top shelf at the petrol station,

It's closer to not letting you into the petrol station at all because there's adult magazines on sale inside, unless you give them your name and address which they record onto a list.

Then once you're in, someone will follow you round the shop, watching what you're doing.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:02 pm
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One step further than that Cougar. They watch you go into the toilets with a packet of Kleenex.


 
Posted : 24/07/2013 8:04 pm
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