[Closed] On my way to get the snip!

OP, I hope all went well. Do take it very easy for a few days and wait at least a week if not two before going out on the MTB

You just need to watch out for blue balls 😉 it's amazing how many nurses decide they need to check your wound afterwards. Nothing like having to lift your gown to show off your scabby nuts to numerous middle aged fat ladies, makes for some interesting chat.

I think it all went well. He seemed happy. I'm bloody uncomfortable now though, that's for sure.

Seems really swollen.

ice pack please.

Ibuprofen, frozen peas and MTFU 🙂

I think some get it worse, my surgeon appears to have been pretty skillful. I picked up a horrible bug (presumably from the hospital, full of sick people..)
the following weekend, that was the only real bad bit.

I drove to Stansted the same afternoon to pick my father-in-law up (Thursday), felt OK, Friday looked after the kids while the missus went shopping with FIL, felt kinda tender, Saturday and Sunday much the same. Monday felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer to them. Rest of the week was hardly able to walk without looking like John Wayne... by the Friday the pain had subsided.

It's ok cause the wife's home so to take my mind of it shes not stopped moaning about how I've not emptied the ****ing dishwasher. So that's good.

toppers3933 - Member

Seems really swollen.

Slap raw liver on them and then find a dog to gently and slowly lick them for you 💡

Had mine about 8 weeks ago, was OK til the wound got infected. The doc said it happens to about 1 in 20 - nice odds !!!
Had to rub cream in twice a day for a few days, unfortunately I couldn't convince the wife she should help.

Don't worry if they don't give you enough local first - they will realise a fraction of a second after you do!

ernie_lynch - Member

Genuine question btw.

I think the idea of firing blanks is to stop babies Chewwy. Although I'm not entirely sure, maybe it's got something to do with taste, less salty perhaps.

Hmmm ... that's a bit drastic to castrate yourself innit?

What's the process like anyway? Do they have to poke down the "mouth" of you little man? Or do they just cut an open wound in your sack and then stick a very hot iron to burn off the nerve something like that? Ya? No?

My wife had been on various contraceptives all of which seemed to produce unwanted side effects so I did this so she didn't have to take them anymore.
It was fine by the way. The anesthetic is wearing off now though.

Ah that makes sense but still a rather drastic measure by comparison to using rubber or backdoor entry ...

Stevet1 - Member

Like my cats & dogs when they got castrated they put on weight.

You do realise that castration removes the source of the swimmers right? And by doing so it also lowers testosterone levels which is why your cat and dogs got fat.

This is similar process? Once that procedure is done will it make the person speak with slightly higher pitch volume?

It is a common knowledge in ancient China that eunuchs tend to have high pitch speaking volume coz they got theirs chopped off ... the whole lot ... nothing dangling ... according to my grandma.

😯

What's the process like anyway? Do they have to poke down the "mouth" of you little man? Or do they just cut an open wound in your sack and then stick a very hot iron to burn off the nerve something like that? Ya? No?

Nothing too drastic. After strapping the person down (or getting someone to hold their legs) they make a small incision in the scrotum and then carefully tease out the two testicles, a quick snip with a pair of scissors followed by a couple of stitches and the whole procedure is over in 2 or 3 minutes.

If you pay extra and go private they'll pop a couple of large ball bearings in the scrotum before stitching it up so that it hangs down naturally.

ernie_lynch - Member
Nothing too drastic. After strapping the person down (or getting someone to hold their legs) they make a small incision in the scrotum and then carefully tease out the two testicles, a quick snip with a pair of scissors followed by a couple of stitches and the whole procedure is over in 2 or 3 minutes.

If you pay extra and go private they'll pop a couple of large ball bearings in the scrotum before stitching it up so that it hangs down naturally.

Crikey ... at least it's not like castrating piglet where we just cut the sack open and pull the nuts out then cut it off then spray them with antibiotic and let it be ... the piglet would scream but after that just normal.

toppers3933 - Member

Seems really swollen.

Oh my , just wait till you get up tomorrow and everything (Yes EVERYTHING) is purple 😆

Well? Has it made a vas deferens?

Chapeau eddiebaby.

You've been there
You've done it
Now get your "I FIRE BLANKS" t shirt

I think I'll stick with menopausal women as my contraception. 😀

ernie and chewkw : please keep the discussion going. It's made my morning reading that.

Back to see doc int he morning. Not particularly painful but even I know they're not supposed to swell up like this.
They are a rather interesting shade of purple too.

[img] [/img]

I shouldnt but LOLZ.

PS hope all is okay

Mine went smoothly apart from later on picking up an infection in the wound - nothing a good scrub out with carbolic (wince!) and some antibiotics couldn't sort. Very little pain or bruising.

My work colleague however claims his meat and 2 veg went roughly the colour of aubergines. So much so his wife wanted to take pictures to show her friends.

He declined.

Apart from the green bits those aubergines look pretty similar.

f you pay extra and go private they'll pop a couple of large ball bearings in the scrotum before stitching it up so that it hangs down naturally.

I went private and got ceramic ones.

I didn't actually, NHS special. But now they've lost one of my samples so to be on the safe side I have to do another.

Feels like I'll be spending the rest of my life spilling seed (less) into a small pot.

I didn't actually, NHS special.

Well if you had upgraded to steel instead of ceramic you would have found that when the steel ones clang together the sparks generated send a flash of light which penetrates through the thin wall of the scrotum adding a new interesting dimension to bedroom frolics. Having said that your ceramic ones won't overheat and will stop quicker should you want to come to a sudden halt.

Loose bearings are so last year. Mine run up and down a groove that is designed for them to sit in.

If I ever get the snip, it'll be a walk in the park compared to what I've just been through/am going through 'down there' :/

DezB - Member

I think I'll stick with menopausal women as my contraception.

ernie and chewkw : please keep the discussion going. It's made my morning reading that.

Yes, some educational information I guess.

I mean where do they cut? Or do they make a slight cut in between the sack then stick a red hot poker in?

As far as I can remember reading the story of Chinese eunuch they just cut the whole lot off then put a "straw" to the hole to prevent it closing until it heal up. Sew up the rest and let the person to recuperate. The person who undergo this sort of procedure would have to endure the pain for several weeks sometime feverish etc and in a very unfortunate situation the person would die. In a way it's like the ancient ways of gender reassignment I guess.

😯

I turns out I have a private doctor so inbetween a couple of other things I mentioned this. This was 10am, 6pm they call me and ask if I can come in Monday no pun intended. I feel rushed here, like a startled stallion hanging onto the last seeds of creation. My wife laughed, cruelly I felt.....

I got halfway through the op, the couldn't dig out the second tube, so offered to send me home 'half cocked'. I told em to crack on. The opposite of nzcol - get it done, pleeeeeease.

Mate at work had an infection , me on the other hand went in feeling like death full of Flu ,came out fresh as a daisy because I lost around 2 ltrs through sweat during the procedure , made it worse the nurse looked like Helga from Hello Hello !

Don't worry, its a snip...

I had mine done 8 weeks or so ago, took 30 mins, everything fine apart for the small section of tube that wasn't anaesthetised...I felt the doc burning the tube...and nearly shot off the bed. Otherwise all fine. The car journey home was interesting as the missus drives like Carlos Sainz. Quick easy recovery - even gave the missus one the night after and then back on the road bike with a week.

Mrs t was at work on the day so mummy t drove me there and back. Most uncharacteristicly she attacked every speed bump on the way home like she was on her winning run at Red Bull Rampage.

Turns out I have an unusual amount of bruising hence the swelling. It's fair to say I've been more comfortable.

How long before you can service the machine again?

How do you know 100% that you wont need it again one day?
Im happy and a family guy but nothing is certain in life is it?

Because I'm happy with the kids I have and don't want any more. I'm 40 this year and don't see it being a realistic need in the future. Also if we do want anymore, we will apply to adopt.

rmgdsc76 - Member
How long before you can service the machine again?
POSTED 2 HOURS AGO # REPORT-POST

The way they look at the minute it's going to be a while. 😯

You sure they did not take something extra away leaving you with one ... 😯

Cost me £25 30 yrs ago; private with a local anaesthetic. I remember lying there with my nuts in a steel kidney dish watching smoke wafting up to the ceiling. The clinic was on the same street that staff (predominantly female)from a packaging factory walked along at the end of their shift. I came out the clinic at 5.15pm which had a long footpath to a gate onto the street. There were hordes of them walking past. I remember thinking "****, they know what this place is"!! So I did my best nonchalant walk down the path to the gate and got in my car. There was a bunch of them pissin' themselves laughing and taking the mick. As I got in the car, I looked down and the cotton wool padding they had dressed my nuts with was hanging out of my zip; which I'd forgotten to do up in my hurry to get out.
Anywhoo; my mates got me a tee shirt printed with IOFB on the front, and I wore it every Friday for months afterwards.
Best £25 I ever spent and absolutely no problems or issues; except it doesn't it doesn't get tested as much these days.

Safe to say it's a lot more than £25 to go private these days!

How do you know 100% that you wont need it again one day?

I love my two kids more than anything, the most precious and amazing things I have been involved with.

But I was mid-30s when we started, I was 40 when I had the snip. I [u]never[/u] want to have any more for a whole heap of reasons - health, financial, age are just some.

If I end up back on the market for a woman with child bearing aspirations, she just can't have kids with me. It will be part of the package. She will have to be with me in order to be with [u]me[/u], and not with a view to us having our own family.

I realise I may well die a lonely and bitter old man on the back of this. Or I might get divorced first..... 😉

Done under a general 8 yrs ago, along with some cysts removed, not long after youngest was born. Bit achy for 3 months or so afterwards, otherwise fine. If I'd known I was gonna get prostate cancer requiring surgery 7 yrs later might not have bothered 🙄

Yep, I agree. At the time, I was 28, we had two sons. All we wished for (despite problems with both at birth). We decided that was enough so I went for the snip, not wishing my wife to have to take responsibility and the health risks of contraception. My attitude was that even if I failed as a husband; I'd still be a Dad. Thankfully all is good 30 yrs down the line. So, for me, best £25 ever spent.

How do you know 100% that you wont need it again one day?

Oh, I know. Fool me once...