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Oh noes! I've ...
 

[Closed] Oh noes! I've offended someone on Facebook

 Pook
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[#5181845]

I suspect in relation to the shocking events in Woolwich, she posts
"Nobody is born evil"

To which i posted a picture of The Omen's famous kinder-satan, Damien. This triggered a flurry of likes.

She also said "Was your child born evil?". Having a 3 month old boy, I took this somewhat personally, but simply asked 'Mine?'

Anyway, she's then deleted all that and sent me a message saying "A grave evening for comic posts of the character Damien."

I've told her that humour is good to help people move on from shock and she's come back with
"By understanding why people are perpetrators of this kind of act can we move forward."

I've suggested 'dialogue with terrorists?'

What to say next?


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:23 pm
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lolcats.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:25 pm
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Link to "Am I Evil?" by Diamond Head.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:25 pm
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As a general rule, anyone who uses the phrase "move forward" in this sort of context, isn't worth talking to.
She'll be "drawing a line under it all" next.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:26 pm
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I've suggested 'dialogue with terrorists?'

At risk of getting flamed/a visit from the ban hammer, describing these people as terrorists is validating what they did. 'Murderers' is a better description IMHO.

lolcats.

+1


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:26 pm
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Sounds like my niece. She's a sighcologist.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:26 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:29 pm
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At risk of getting flamed/a visit from the ban hammer, describing these people as terrorists is validating what they did.

I don't think so. It's categorising it. 'Terror' seems to have come to mean an atrocity against the public that's politically motivated. As opposed to personally motivated.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:29 pm
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I did similar a few months ago when one of my feminist friends was going off on one about how sexist the Daily Mail was being as usual, when only the previous evening she'd been letching over the 6th formers at her introduction to her sons new secondary school.

I dared to suggest that what she had been doing was similar to the Daily Mails ususal sexist stuff and was immediately put back in my place by her and her feminist friends.

Facebooks so much fun!


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:47 pm
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Yep. Facebook. People post all sorts of cak. If you 'like' it or comment in a positive way, then all is good. But dare to challenge some of the nonsense people post and all hell breaks loose.

I reacted to a comment my OH's sister made and Jesus.....it went a bit mental.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 10:57 pm
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She also said "Was your child born evil?". Having a 3 month old boy, I took this somewhat personally, but simply asked 'Mine?'

So can we then assume that you were then offended ?


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 11:02 pm
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Laughing at terrorists is the most appropriate response. Carry on as you were.


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 11:06 pm
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I dared to suggest that what she had been doing was similar to the Daily Mails ususal sexist stuff and was immediately put back in my place by her and her feminist friends

Serves you right for having feminist friends - unfriend them, NOW!


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 11:09 pm
 Drac
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 22/05/2013 11:18 pm
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Tell her they aren't evil. Just misguided. Or that the obviously have ADD


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 8:08 am
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"Wanna cyber?"


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 8:22 am
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@Pook - English as a second language or was she just born in Sheff? 😀


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 8:37 am
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You make a tasteless joke to a friend and their response is to ask if your three month old son was born evil? And she thinks [i]you've[/i] caused offence?

The second half of the correct response here is "... in the eye socket."


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 8:59 am
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"By understanding why people are perpetrators of this kind of act can we move forward."

She's bang on there.

'dialogue with terrorists?'

And you're not. Seems like you were trying to be 'clever', and it's backfired on you. And now you're kvetching about it on another social media site, fishing for support, because you feel a bit put out. Suck it up and move on. Life's too short.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 9:12 am
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Seems like you were trying to be 'clever', and it's backfired on you.

From the sketchy details in the OP, sounds like he was pwned on facebook. Oh noes.

Also, I think The Omen is just a story. It's not real.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 9:15 am
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Quartz +1


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 10:00 am
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You make a tasteless joke to a friend and their response is to ask if your three month old son was born evil?* And she thinks you've caused offence?

well you said something provocative [or silly if you prefer] to someone making a serious point and now you want to somehow take the moral high ground in all this and be the offended one.
I think you are both over reacting tbh.

* are you aware of rhetorical questions? She was proving her point not actually asking this


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 10:52 am
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Sadly facebook doesnt seem to cope with rational debate (any better than STW does on occasion).
I've had similar stuff get way out of hand (other person not me) and they just resorted to personal insults. Confirmed to me they were still as big a fat bullying mouthpiece as they were when I was a school with them.
It did take quite a lot of self discipline to step away from that, despite wanting to let fly with a string of abuse. He wouldn't have listened.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 11:43 am
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It did take quite a lot of self discipline to step away from that, despite wanting to let fly with a string of abuse. He wouldn't have listened.

I believe Facebook has an "unfriend" button, or at least settings so that you can set this person as invisible to you and you to them without them having to deal with the heartbreak of you "unfriending" them.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 11:55 am
 grum
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Not sure what's worse: the non-issue, or posting about the non-issue on here as well. 🙂


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:03 pm
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Or commenting* on a non-issue. 😛

*Guilty m'lud.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:14 pm
 grum
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Or commenting on someone commenting on a non-issue? 🙂


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:17 pm
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Or replying to it 😉


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:17 pm
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Confirmed to me they were still as big a fat bullying mouthpiece as they were when I was a school with them.

Why on earth are you "friends" with them then? I might not have a long list of FB friends, but every single one of them is somebody I like.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:17 pm
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Or commenting on someone commenting on a non-issue?

I wouldn't ever do that.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:18 pm
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aracer - Member

Confirmed to me they were still as big a fat bullying mouthpiece as they were when I was a school with them.

Why on earth are you "friends" with them then? I might not have a long list of FB friends, but every single one of them is somebody I like.


Not friends with them directly, but through a mutual friend and it was their thread the discussion was on.
I dont have friends on FB that I wouldn't be happy talking to in real life.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 12:46 pm
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Why on earth are you "friends" with them then? I might not have a long list of FB friends, but every single one of them is somebody I like.
+1

I've taken to removing people from my friend list if they piss me off. I realised one day that facebook is there for my fun and there were a few people who would just go on there to wind people up or lecture people on how they think they should behave or act. That's not fun and sometimes I got upset about what they had posted, you know, not like crying and weeping about it but having it go round n round in my mind. Unfortunately one of these people is my Uncle and thinking back he always kinda pissed me off, so I deleted him and his wife. This means that he can't see pictures of my little girl and other family news, but hey ho tough shit.

Did make me think though that deleting someone off your facebook is kinda serious, you could say oh it's just social media but before FB you might have seen your extended family only once or twice a year and you'd only hear their news from talking to your mum on the phone. Deleting them from FB effectively removes them from your life, cept for Christmas cards.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:05 pm
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I dont have friends on FB that I [s]wouldn't be happy talking to[/s]know in real life

FTFMe


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:06 pm
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jekkyl - you know you can ignore people without deleting them from FB?

wife is/was in a similar situation, deleting may cause more grief than it's worth so why not just block all their updates


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:20 pm
 Pook
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for the record, at no point have I been offended. I questioned whether she was referring to my child personally. She didn't respond.

In my opinion, peoples' kids are entirely off limits.

And yes, my post was silly. Arguably Facebook is silly and I stand by the argument that humour is useful to get over shock.

I'm ever so sorry if I've offended you too.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:23 pm
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for the record, at no point have I been offended. I questioned whether she was referring to my child personally. She didn't respond.

In my opinion, peoples' kids are entirely off limits.

And yes, my post was silly. Arguably Facebook is silly and I stand by the argument that humour is useful to get over shock.

I'm ever so sorry if I've offended you too

Well thas made thibed, thad better lie in it, maybe a few laps round Langsett or Cuttgate will do thi some good !


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:34 pm
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sounds like she needs a hug.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:36 pm
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Sounds like he needs a hug and someone to explain rhetorical to him during the hug

I'm ever so sorry if I've offended you too

You seem to be the only one offended here
Perhaps she did it as a joke to help her get over the shock of your joke 😉


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:47 pm
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Sounds like he needs a hug and someone to explain rhetorical to him during the hug

I'm ever so sorry if I've offended you too

You seem to be the only one offended here
Perhaps she did it as a joke to help her get over the shock of your joke 😉

She is not saying your child is evil is she;her point is no one is born evil


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:48 pm
 Pook
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I'd post a picture of Damien from the omen but it's not worth the hassle.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 1:53 pm
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Not entirely sure why you got upset with her.

She 'asked' if your child was evil...she didn't say that your child definately was evil.

Has she even met your child for you to think she had a valid opinion?


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 5:45 pm
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her point is no one is born evil

On that I would argue against her; I'm convinced there are people who are born evil, or irretrievably bad, who are utterly, unspeakably cruel to others, and revel in that cruelty. Such people have often come from ordinary, loving families, with no obvious reason for their behaviour, other than it's an inherent part of their psychological make-up.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 6:03 pm
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Facebook is a bit weird for this. I was recently unfriended by someone I know well and have ridden with because I dared respond to a post they'd made with a counter-opinion of my own. It was about politics and I do think that if folk want to post that stuff then they should be prepared goat a response they may not like.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 6:19 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 6:21 pm
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I think people are not born evil, but they may have a tendency towards amorality.


 
Posted : 23/05/2013 6:24 pm
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