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Partly based on reading this thread, last night I broached the subject of perhaps shutting the lid on the toothpaste so it doesn't end up with a horrible dry lumpy bit at the top.
Note, I did not mention the fact that she is a top squeezer.
I don't know why I bothered as the reaction I got was more in line with that I'd expect if I told her I'd popped round and murdered her parents.
Her car is like a driveable skip but she moans that I have the odd bot of work or biking kit in the back of my van.
Moaning that her phone's 16g of memory is full (she primarily looks at Facebook, takes pictures or plays solitaire).
Pretty much every app possible is constantly open and her photo reel is thousands and thousands of pics of the dog, or a pretty view or whatever that she never shares, or even looks at again. I got blasted for suggesting that maybe the pic of the dog asleep in the sofa from 3 years ago looks identical to the one she took yesterday...
I am quite sure that her contribution to this thread would be far far longer than mine though.
MrsBouy will never back down from an argument.
We have many, we clash 50% of the time, I'm getting increasingly more pissed off by her as time rattles on.
There, I've said it.
She cannot end a txt conversation. I have been sent "Ok" about 100000000000000 times
Does not pair up socks before putting them in drawer
Cannot choose a parking space unless there is only one empty bay
Leaving washing up "to soak" for way too long, E.g overnight.
Overnight! I wish. We have a pan that she cremated something in on Sunday and it is still soaking. The kids and I have bets on how long it will be there for. Youngest has gone for a few days, middle one says a month, eldest says a week. My money is on it staying there until it either rusts through or the kitchen is replaced around it.
This is like group therapy.
A couple more.
She'll call me on my mobile from hers, Im not always able to answer, no message left, yet I'll call back a couple of minutes later and she wont answer, so I keep trying, never does she answer her frikken phone.
Always says I have the car keys, even when I dont. Was once round mums and she wanted the car key, "I gave it to you earlier" says I, "no you didnt", *sighs*, "yes I did" etc etc. Almost develops into a full blown row, suggested she check her handbag, "its not in there, I KNOW it isn't". I insisted, "oh".......... 😯 ARRRGGHHH.
Never apologises or admits she's wrong EVER. Not once.
today it's this following abc combo:
a) complain that there's not enough fruit and veg in our diets.
b) coincidently forget to eat any of the fruit and veg that i pack into our breakfast/lunch/dinner.
c) complain that there's not enough fruit and veg in our diets.
bearnecessities - Member
Tbh, a teabag on worktop sounds quite accommodating for a wife.
😆
got home from work last night and she tells me she's not happy...the bag with my riding kit is by the kitchen door
"why is it there?"
"cos it needs to go in the wash"
"well why hasnt it gone in?"
"well i would if i could find a fee moment with the washing machine"
"what do you mean?"
"well since i went riding 2 weeks ago you've constantly had the machine on...so when am i supposed to put them in?"
she glares at me...
"i dont always have the machine on"
"yes you do...its even on now behind you"
"its not my stuff in there though"
"well whos is it?"
"its all the kids stuff"
at that precise moment the machine stopped, so i thought just to piss her off i'd open it to see what was in there...
lo and behold i pull out the following items:
3 maxi dresses
4 cardigans
2 pairs of pyjama bottoms (in pink)
2 pairs of work trousers
2 blouses
1 dress top
various items of underwear
ALL HERS!!
oh and a pair of jeans and a t shirt belonging to the little one
so the washing was the kids stuff on account of there being 2 items being stuffed in there with all her stuff
i havent seen her wear 2 of the maxi dresses or cardigans for weeks so i asked her
"when did you wear these to get them dirty"
"well they were in the wardrobe and i thought i'd give them another wash cos its going to be warm and sunny this weekend and i might want to wear them"
😯 😯 😯
also she's the only person who can burn food and get it to stick onto a non stick frying pan
its actually quite funny some the mad shit she does!!
but i still love the daft cowbag!! 🙂
Being unable to park the car in a straight line - drives me NUTS
My wife leaves things to 'soak'. Except what she actually does is take any dirty pan or dish, fill it with water (whether or not it needs soaking) and then leave it somewhere for days. Often in the sink itself, or even more annoying balanced over the sink, rendering the sink unusable until someone braves the primordial soup and cleans it out. Whilst this lot has been fermenting, the gunge underneath it is forming a rival disgustingness.
The reason I don't always get to it quickly enough, btw, is that I'm often away.
Actually, it's generally the case that she takes something out of its home, uses it then leaves it where she finished with it. She does lots of crafting and other assorted projects, we have lots of boxes of stuff. The whole spare bedroom (not a small room) is the craft room, and you can barely get into it. There are no spare spaces, because every surface including the floor is covered with boxes and piles of stuff. Then she ends up having to work in the kitchen or on the floor in the hallway. FFS!
Both her parents are exactly the same, mind. They have a big US sized 5 bed house with basement and massive double garage, and only the two of them live in it. The garage, three of the bedrooms (possibly four) are no-go areas because they're so full of crap, and the basement is so full of stuff it boggles the eyes. It's like a where's wally drawing only instead of people it's stuff - tins of paint, tools, bits of furniture, and general household debris that can't really be identified from a casual glance because there's JUST TOO MUCH OF IT.
I'm not a tidy person, I'm a really messy person, but FFS even I have limits.
Main one is why does every light in the house need to be on. And while I am it it why does she always turn up late for everything? When we are due to leave the house she always finds something crucial to do at the last minute like organising what we are going to eat for dinner for the next week. Maybe the most annoying one is actually being constantly told I am wrong, nothing specific, just everything I say and do.
Main one is why does every light in the house need to be on. And while I am it it why does she always turn up late for everything? When we are due to leave the house she always finds something crucial to do at the last minute like organising what we are going to eat for dinner for the next week. Maybe the most annoying one is actually being constantly told I am wrong, nothing specific, just everything I say and do.
Are you shacked up with my ex? If she asks you a question, then immediately starts talking over you as you give an answer, then I think you must be 😆
[quote=Cougar ]
Cutting bread. She is incapable* of cutting it in a vertical line, her cut always slopes from right to left top to bottom.
Is she left-handed by any chance?
No, just somewhat inept at some things - and incapable* of learning better ways to do things.
Kids sandwiches today - thin at one end, thick at the other (I cut the bread last night, so the bread started off with a vertical side)
*unwilling, especially when I've suggested the better way
This has been one of the funniest threads I have read on here for a while. Some comedy gold in here. Good work people. 🙂
What is it with women and lights though? My missus also appears to need light on in whatever room she has passed through even if the sun is blazing in through the windows to the point that you can't even tell the lights are on.
I can also identify with the dishwasher stories. I don't doubt that I am a bit more generous with the stacking in the dishwasher but she will often complain that there is still more space and just chuck stuff in where there is clearly not gong to get an all round clean. That is relatively rare though as more often than not stuff gets stacked on the side. WTF is wrong with taking the extra 3 seconds to put it straight in the dishwasher??? It takes longer to come along later and put it in, why not do it as part of the same operation as bringing stuff back into the kitchen??
And the other one that seems quite common - using every utensil in the kitchen when cooking or baking and then just leaving them to fester when finished with. "It's ok, I'll clean them up later when I've finished"? Oh really? I've yet to see this phenomenon.
Still, there's plenty more for her to complain about me though. She has at last persuaded me that it's not a bad idea to use the air spray when I have finished in the bathroom as, for some reason, I seem to be able to generate some really quite toxic and paint peeling aromas after a pleasing dump. Never used to see the problem in leaving the bathroom door open after finishing and letting the gentle perfume waft around the house.
Walking away to the other end of the house while talking and expecting you to either develop super hearing or follow picking up the instructions...
I do this all the time. I will try harder to stop.
The worst one for me is shopping.
why oh why does she insist on waiting until we are in the queue and next in line to pay before she remembers something she needs and "nips off" to find it. leaving me to pack the bags so extremely slowly it looks as though I've lost my carer & knowing full well she will be at least another five minutes until her return.
and it's not once or twice, it's every bloody time!! and it's not like we haven't just traipsed up and down every single aisle in the supermarket....AARGGH!!!!!
- leaving the top off the washing up liquid. but putting the top back on the rinse aid.
- filling the bowl in the sink with water, w. up liquid, adding things to be washed - then leaving it
- moaning about me 'just' leaving stuff by the sink to be washed (me claiming i'd frikkin do it if someone hadn't filled the sink with shit then not washed it)
My OH has a very odd approach to laundry in that the laundry basket should always be empty. This results of course in all the laundry being on the floor, in piles, outside our bedroom. Next to an empty laundry basket. I even installed a second laundry basket for the pre sorting of colours/whites etc. Nope! still all over the floor, in piles.
She's an artist and the common theme with them is that they work in a guddle most of the time. Her approach to prepping meals is quite difficult for me as I worked in restaurants and kitchens and the whole clean as you go principle. Yet she has an obsession with multiple chopping boards. On the other hand she's a very good and enthusiastic cook so I just clean up around her and scoff lovely dinners.
nope - mine is (if anything) the oppositeWhat is it with women and lights though?
Ahh I put my foot down and banned dishwashers & microwaves from [b]my[/b] kitchen.with the dishwasher stories.
🙄 It means I do most it though as chief cook and bottle-washer, on the other hand she won't leave 'cos she'd starve 🙂
like that word 😀 she has friends who are like thatguddle
we used to have the dishwasher issue, but not any more. a small child who doesnt belong to us broke on of the soap dispenser trays so we dont use it now. all we use it for is to store the spare dinner set
Pretty much all of the above,covering 2 x relationships over approximately 30 years.
Im happily single now.
And another (brought on by the good weather we are suddenly having).
It was a glorious day yesterday, absolutely beautiful.
So I had to ask why she had the tumble drier on. The answer 'it is just some bits'.
Bits that can bloody dry outdoors FFS!
So, to show my indignation, I put my freshly washed gym stuff on the line outside.
Major one is every light in the house needs to be on.
No prioritisation - seems to do anything and everything but the one thing that would allow us to leave the house on time
Complains that we are always late see ^
Reminds me of my failings at least twice a day, I already know hem and at 51 they are unlikely to change 🙂
Falls asleep on the sofa and shouts if I suggest she maybe should go to bed
Brilliant thread.
Wimmin eh
@gonzy - you do know that most dishwasher tablets are supposed to go in / on top of the cutlery basket ?
Why anyone would choose to not use a dishwasher is beyond me (assuming it is correctly stacked of course ... ;))
Timekeeping, inherited from her father. She has no concept of being on time arrgh!
Never answering her mobile phone or looking at texts till hours later, probably related to the time keeping gene mutation.
Faffing, how is it I can get dressed, get both bikes out out of the shed, lube and pressure checked and ready to roll and she's still wondering what jacket to wear and what's the weather like outside!
Have you lot learned nothing? Your partner has no bad habits merely affectations. You, on the other hand...
My OH has a very odd approach to laundry in that the laundry basket should always be empty. This results of course in all the laundry being on the floor, in piles, outside our bedroom. Next to an empty laundry basket. I even installed a second laundry basket for the pre sorting of colours/whites etc. Nope! still all over the floor, in piles.
Are they bolted to the floor? Only, there's at least two people in your house not chucking those piles into the baskets.
Tbf she puts up with a lot but;
She works 20 minutes away but insists on phoning on her way home to chat about nothing. Invariably somewhere well get a "OH was that a red light?"!!!!!!!!
Whenever she opens the car door at home she smacks it off something. Either the bins or my van. Not hard but......
Faffing, how is it I can get dressed, get both bikes out out of the shed, lube and pressure checked and ready to roll and she's still wondering what jacket to wear and what's the weather like outside!
We have a similar thing, in that I can get ready in 1/2 the time she can, so I let her get up and have breakfast before me, safe in the knowledge that I can get up and sorted and we'll both be ready to go at the same time, but oh no, that doesn't work because she won't [i]start [/i]getting ready until I do, so we're back to square one. I try suggesting she starts gettign ready earlier and get the following repsonse "but then I'll be ready before you!"
Oh will you, will you really? I think not....
It's all just the fun of life with someone though, I'm sure I'm just as bad or worse for other things and I wouldn't change her 😀
@gonzy - you do know that most dishwasher tablets are supposed to go in / on top of the cutlery basket ?
not this one...its an older philips whirlpool and the tablets are supposed to go in a compartment n the door. the dishwasher wont run unless the compartment door is closed but its been broken. not bothered about replacing the whole thing right now as we're selling the house so we'll bin it and get another if/when needed
Bath towels.
Either left on the bed, soaking wet.
Or the floor, soaking wet.
Or the bedstead, soaking wet.
Or the back of a chair, soaking wet.
Or at best, a half arsed attempt at the towel rail which results in a rammed-in, tightly wedged, screwed up damp mess.
Cant believe I have read every single post and the biggest bugbear with me has not been mentioned at all - have you all trained your wives so well that THEY NEVER LEAVE THE WINDOWS OPEN AND HEATING ON??
I just cant seem to drum into the other half that its just like throwing money out the window - her response is she pays the gas/electric, well yes but we are in this together and it really doesnt make sense me coming home from work to find ALL radiators blasting out heat and at least 4/5 windows open as "its a bit warm in here" 🙁
Oh, and lights
Oh and, while we are on, the toilet door thing...to me its something that we do in private, the last thing I want to hear is her having a wee or worse...please please please just CLOSE THE BLOODY DOOR !
I'm going to have to go with another washing up related one over here...
There is a dishwasher in the house, however instead of putting the dishes straight in the dishwasher when done she insists on putting them in the sink, that on one hand is just daft as as other people have already mentioned it takes even longer to come back and put them in the dishwasher later. The second thing is that even if she doesn't want to put straight in the dishwasher they HAVE to go in the sink, they can't just go 'on the side' why? because she doesn't want to see the mess, so they go in the sink so they are out of site, therefore rendering the sink unusable!
Also terrible at turning off lights
Also terrible at having the apartment in sauna mode instead of just putting on a jumper or trousers or something.
Also does the thing where she asks me to pass her things which as just as close, if not closer, to her than me?!
This is slowly turning into an epic thread
In my case
- She expects me to hear what she is saying, regardless of where I am in the house, but gets upset with me in I expect the same thing
- Dishwasher!!!!!!
- Runs to a just in time policy for going out - we are always late
- Getting ready to go for a ride, I can normally get dressed, sort out two bikes, drinks, etc and still have time for a cup of tea. Except for the one time, when I was 30 seconds late and it was all my fault that we left late
- Does the washing up, but then leaves the cooling water in the bowl, with a congealing mass on the surface just in case something else needs to be washed.
I am sure that I am far, far worse.
iancity1 - I think you may be married to a girl I used to share a house with at university. It used to drive the rest of us up the ****ing wall!!!
The total irrationality of it seemed obvious to everyone but her. I've had the heating on all day, despite it being June, and its getting a bit hot in here. What should I do? Turn the heating off? Naaah. I'll leave it on full, blasting heat out, while I go round the house and open all the windows.
The mind truly boggles at the thought process involved
Collects all manner of cheap or free shit from local Facebook groups, comes back with something every day, just utter shit
Agreeing with all my crazy ideas.
Washing up, specifically glasses - which should apparently be done as quickly as possible, and just on the insides.
I, on the other hand, have OCD about clean glasses. Post-dinner cleanup last night resulted in greasy / smeary glasses this morning, so I left the sink filling up (slow hot water tap!) while I made my lunch, with said glasses on the side waiting for me to do a decent job on them alongside a few other times, while OH is still in bed blissfully unaware.
OH then unexpectedly walks in and decides to do the washing up I'd intended. I didn't want to upset her happy mood, so left her to it.
It's OK though, I'll be home from work before her this evening so can finally do a good job on them this evening, ready for a couple of beers while fettling the bikes later ready for our weekend adventures.
(I am certainly not without my faults, however 🙂 )
mrhoppy - Member
bigyinn - Member
A few....
Moaning that a small pile of my magazines at the side of the sofa is my contribution to the general shit-hole mess of a house that she and my son leave behind them. I dont have mess in the house, thats why I have sheds.
Oh god yes, asymetric mess perception. The kitchen a mess and it's all my fault because my lights are charging by the back door with my small box of biking essentials, conveniently ignoring the forests worth of her pointless magazines and stuff she's got out with hoppy jr and not put away. But what's worse is you still get the same view when it's been put away.
Oh this, thirded. She keeps going on about the house needing decluttered. It's all shit that she got for herself or the kids / didn't put away after using. In the general mess there are 2 of my magazines. And I have repeatedly suggested that buying massive toys (baby bouncers etc.) is not a great idea, to no avail.
using the hot tap, but not for long enough for hot water to reach the tap.
y'know, 5-15 seconds, enough to get the boiler to kick in, and burn off a few quids worth of gas, but not long enough to actually benefit from the hot water.
mind you, i'm the stealth washer-upperer, the one that clears up around her when she's baking. i have a knack for cleaning and tidying-away the utensils she most needs next. i'm a dead man walking.
5-15 seconds, enough to get the boiler to kick in, and burn off a few quids worth of gas
You need your boiler servicing 😉
Won't wash any dirty crockery/cutlery, because it is not her job, she would rather raid the cupboards and use tupperware or pyrex than wash a plate/dish by the sink.
When I'm about to finish washing up everything that was by the sink, she brings ~2 days worth of her dirty dishes through, that she left scattered around her side of the sofa and pc desk.
She cleans the guinea pigs indoor run out, putting the old newspaper/hay etc. in carrier bags... All good so far. But she never then takes them directly to the wheelie bin outside, they must live at the top of the stairs for days. And as she is off to work this morning, she asks if I can take them out as she walks right past them!
She insists on having baths late afternoon, despite the immersion heater heating up on E7 electric every night, so it needs an expensive re-heat just before bath time. And despite a sticky note by bath that she wrote, reminding her to turn off the immersion ASAP, I often find it still on hours later!
I'm going to stop now, this is putting a negative vibe on my free Friday! 😆
it is comforting to know it is not just me that gets wound up by my other half.
How many lipsticks do you need....in the car (both), handbags, by the front door, everywhere.
Always late, she has more stuff to do to get out of the door. She might be correct but when I point out that she knew this when she got up (late) then why is it a surprise every time.
Drives like the clutch is on or off, does not hear bad noises coming from the car, takes the wrong line around corners and takes them like they are all 90 degrees. Great with a bad back.
Buys all manner of organic sh1t. Himalayan pink crystal salt??,
It is winding me up typing this as it is reminding me of more....
My missus leaves her mobile phone on the meter cupboard, next to the landline (which is unplugged).
This means whenever she gets a call, text etc she has to get up and walk out to the hallway to answer it.
The clue is in the word 'mobile' FFS!!
I've raised it numerous times and suggested she keeps her phone on her, but she just looks at me like I'm a bit odd.
<sighs>