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[Closed] mother in laws

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Got the future mother in law over from Australia. I'm being nice as pie, taking her where she wants to go etc. Anyway today had nothing planned, and I was feeling a bit bad about leaving her and my fiancee in the house all day, so suggested castleton.
Went over there, had some food, walked around, lent her my camera to take some pics. Then we went through hope and bamford just so she could see it, then back through castleton. She asked me to slow down so she can video the Christmas lights (on my camera), so I'm doing about 5mph and she asks me to slow down more, to which I reply ' I'm going at walking pace'
Then she completely blows up ' you ****ing prick, I've spent $8000 getting here you ****er etc' and I think shes joking, but it turns out she's not. So I say ' I can't believe you're actually serious'
My fiancee and a few other family members have told me she's mental.
She will not apologise and she's staying at my house for another 3 weeks. I had a right go at her saying nobody speaks to me like that even if I'm acting like an arsehole which I'm clearly not. Fiancee was in tears and says she doesn't know what to do with her. She's refusing to say she's in the wrong. I just want an easy life 🙁


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:11 pm
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MTFU put her out. Job done, that will teach her.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:17 pm
 wors
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Haha..erm sorry to here. But most MIL= PSYCHO.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:17 pm
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rejoice she lives in australia and you dont mine lived around the corner you luck lucky man


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:17 pm
 tang
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Just be thankful you will be packing her off to oz soon. I feel every bit of your pain.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:17 pm
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Tell her very quietly when you are alone that if she wants to have any involvement with her future grandchildren then she had better think very carefully about how she speaks to you. Do it with palpable menace in your voice. If she kicks off, book her into a B&B and apologise to your future wife.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:20 pm
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I have a MIL and a step MIL. They are both psycho. Think yourself lucky. But if she keeps up that nonsense kick her out.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:22 pm
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be the bigger person here.. for your fiancees sake..

apologise to the witch.. ask if there's anything you can do to make it up to her.. then grit your teef.. think happy thoughts and put on your best smile til you put her on the plane..


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:22 pm
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This is the fiancee. HELP!!! Jools will pm our postal address if anyone would like to send us a tranquiliser gun!


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:23 pm
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Just do it for fun.. be the most ingraciating and jolly and self less and patient hosts that you can.. go overboard.. see if she notices


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:27 pm
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Why put up with it, she might come back next year!


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 8:53 pm
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think yourself lucky. mine lives at the bottom of my road.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:01 pm
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no one saying bombers and shoes what has become of stw ? 🙄


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:02 pm
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How about Ketamine?


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:06 pm
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Unfortunately mental health issues are very difficult to address particularly if the sufferer is not willing to accept there is a problem. If she has further unexplained 'outbursts' or other nutty behaviour take her to you GP's or to your local A&E that has a psychiatric unit and get her examined.
She isnt diabetic is she? Just a thought-low blood sugar-unexplained outbursts/anger/confusion.
I would love to have a MIL who doesnt get on my nerves after a short period of time but then its easily solved by a night ride on the day that she is due round 😛


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:09 pm
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My ex's mum was just like the woman you described. I painted her a lovely picture of a weekend away I had to go on with her brood, and she went psycho as I mounted it in cream (which matched her lounge) claiming I was mocking her?!?!?!

My current lovers mum is a pure godess and spoils me rotten, every Saturday when we go to the Chester Grosvenor for tea and cake people assume she's my woman. Lucky lucky sod.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:10 pm
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You realise that she's upstairs in her bedroom, taking naked pictures of herself. With your camera!


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:11 pm
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I get on well with mine now. She lives in the bottom of the garden.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:15 pm
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Just bear in mind that in 30 years this will be your Mrs 😉


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:18 pm
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I can't believe this has thread has lasted this long without someone saying:

Mothers in law

not

Mother in laws

STW pedants, where are you all this evening?

😆


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:19 pm
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How about Ketamine?

Yeah, you won't even know she is there from your hole!


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:20 pm
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That's the beauty of it Torm. If all 3 of 'em get on it they might start enjoying each others company?


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:22 pm
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If she has further unexplained 'outbursts' or other nutty behaviour take her to you GP's or to your local A&E that has a psychiatric unit and get her examined.

that's going to go down really well!!

maybe you need to all sit down calmly with a cuppa and have a chat about it. seeing as it's YOUR house you set the agenda - tell her why you are upset why you think she is unreasonable and why you will not tolerate it in the future. then give her a chance to respond.

you might find that something you has done has wound her up (you might also find that she's just bonkers)

you do realise that women ALWAYS turn into their mothers?


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:24 pm
 Drac
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Had anyone checked Mumsnet to see if there's a woman in there posting how inconsiderate her fiancé partner is?


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:28 pm
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Karinofnine - Member

I can't believe this has thread has lasted this long without someone saying:

Mothers in law

not

Mother in laws

STW pedants, where are you all this evening?

Damn. Sorry I'm late...

Torminalis +1


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:34 pm
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It will get worse once you marry your fiancee and your missus packs you off to live in Oz 😉

I bit my lip for 10 years cant seem to do it anymore - family fracas are a nightmare


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:48 pm
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My mother in law was truly brilliant!

I miss her very much.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:54 pm
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The apple never falls far from the tree, what's her old man like ?


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 9:56 pm
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take a last minute biking holiday booked with her credit card, she'll be home before realising she has paid for it


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:25 pm
 emsz
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God don't get me Started, my gf's mum isn't my no.1 fan.


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:31 pm
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My current lovers mum is a pure godess and spoils me rotten, every Saturday when we go to the Chester Grosvenor for tea and cake people assume she's my woman. Lucky lucky sod.

And a room booked for later????

😉


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:36 pm
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Anytime you're all together and your Mrs leaves the room eg- to go to the toilet or take a phone call etc whisper in her ear that you've killed before and you'll do it again. Nobody will believe her. Next time tell her you worship Satan. Appear incredulous when she grasses on you. Do this for a few days and the wife will probably insist you have her sectioned. HTH


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:38 pm
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STW pedants, where are you all this evening?

Sorry, been in the pub. 😳


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:38 pm
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my son has a particularily nasty norovirus at the moment, but managed to bake some gingerbread men this afternoon in between puking and t'other. I dont really fancy eating them, but would happily send a few up for her to eat as a special treat!

I have the joy of a MIL and a step MIL - ones posh (MIL) and pretty ok, but the other is a chav and gets right on my bazoomas - rest of the family think shes funny and cant understand why I despise her so much...

Personally, I would get rid, asap for yours and the Missus sake and sanity


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 10:47 pm
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That's unlucky. I've always got on great with my MIL's. Shame I can't say the same about their daughters!

FWIW if she had spoken to me like that I think she would have been given all the time she wanted to film the lights......during the leisurely walk back from Castleton


 
Posted : 08/12/2010 11:13 pm
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SILTFU and assume the moral high ground. Mine's a nightmare and coming over tomorrow And has invited my wife's aunt and uncle to stop over as their house is in too much of a state! FIL is great however, if somewhat long-suffering.

Worse still, she, like me, is of the red-haired persuasion, so if we go out everyone automatically assumes she's my mother 🙁


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 12:20 am
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I ****ing hate my MIL, wants to have far to much say on our lives and how we should live them. Old bag demands that every body runs round after her whilst she sits on her arse all day long watching tv, she's like Jim Royle, bone idle and square eyed.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 12:31 am
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I've spent $8000 getting here you

What, she fly business class or something?

And I would no way have had a go at her. Sometimes you need to bite your lip - family time is one of them (when it's the in-laws).

My MIL is one of the nicest people I have ever met.. pretty lucky, but not as lucky as I am to have Mrs Grips 🙂


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 7:22 am
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Did it all get caught on said camera? Play it by accident when going through the photos later, she might be shocked by her own behaviour.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 7:40 am
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I can't beat my MIL.

Which is a pity. 😐


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 8:52 am
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My MIL is a Madame Bucket wannabe. Hell!
Last time we went to see her (a short drive from London to Southern Poland, some 800 miles) I suggested we all went out for a pizza as there's a wonderful parlour 2 mins down the path. She went bonkers, said I hated her cooking, I hated her, I wasn't welcome there anymore. When my Wife tried reasoning with her she was told to leave and never come back. We packed the car back and drove additional 180 miles to my folks.
Have I been back at hers since? Make a guess.
BTW When we moved to Ireland she complained we did it to be even further from her. Now there's absolutely no risk of her popping in as she won't fly Ryanair 🙂


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 9:21 am
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Getting a rise out of you is what she's after - kill her with kindness. She'll hate you all the more and everyone else will be completely on your side.

don't move to oz.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 9:26 am
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Hairychested - that's the kind of insanity I'm talking about. I've been more than accommodating, but it still seems like I'm satans spawn. I really don't think I can win. I've been driving her around, doing as she asks for a week now. I only took her to castleton as I was feeling she might be bored and I wanted her to see as much of England as possible while she's here, and it just blows up in my face. There is no need to speak to people like that. I'm probably better off doing nothing and just leaving her to her own devices. Being a good host certainly isn't getting me anywhere. Looks like the bike might be getting some use over the next few weeks.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 9:47 am
 hels
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Hmm as a fellow anitpodean (not defending her) she could well have missed some british indirect communication that you all do, or not be aware of some social/cultural niceties. I know we all speak kind of the same language but you would be surprised. Can I suggest asking her calmly and directly what is upsetting her ? Can't make it worse. She will be very emotional spending all this time with her daughter and knowing she has to step on a plane soon and who knows when she will she her again (which she prolly sees as your fault).

No excuse for bad behaviour I know but emotions might be running high.

And you get to occupy the moral high ground ! Good luck, sounds a grim christmas.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 9:54 am
 hels
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P.S I suggest opening with a Lindy Chamberlain Dingo joke, the Aussies love that.


 
Posted : 09/12/2010 9:56 am
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