[Closed] Ladies advice please - my boyfriend doesn't like mountain biking!

Thing is, if he was into biking how claustrophobic might it get?

Claustrophobic ? I've enjoyed riding out with the biker babes I've dated, and also an occasional dive into the bushes for some mid-ride nookie too :o)

Too much info there Simon!

This chap needs to MTFU!

After SFB's post I feel soiled.

Show him this thread?

we've only been going out for approx 3.5months

Well short of riding with a sign on my camelbak that says, i'm single! i'm powerless! If indeed i am after tonight as he may have decided to get a grip on his childish behaviour 😕
I think i'm too picky - i want a hugh jackman lookalike who can ride a bike like greg minnaar, wear a suit or a kilt whenever the fancy takes me and all the usual kind to animals/kids etc! Yes in fact, i am too picky 😉
Ironically one of my best girlfriends who has never ridden a bike recently married a mountain biker who she randomly met at a pub 😐

You're not making him wear lycra or ride a Marin are you? I mean the combination of inappropriate gear can be quite off putting!

There's nowt wrong with being picky, better than being stuck with someone you don't like innit.

i want a hugh jackman lookalike who can ride a bike like greg minnaar, wear a suit or a kilt whenever the fancy takes me and all the usual kind to animals/kids etc

Well apparently that would be almost everyone on here specially for the minnar bits 😉

Agreed, better to be single and picky than "with" someone you don't like.

Simple answer to this (apart from controling your hormones of course), A4 paper divided in two. Plus points on one side, minus on the other. Fill in over the weekend and through the week. Next friday post it on here and we will all decide if you should dump him or not. Done.

Now go and ride your bike!

sofatester - i like your style 🙂 although i think i will either dump him or not before i update this thread 😉

I disagree. The plus points may massively outweigh the negative ones, but one big negative one can be enough to override all the plusses, especially if the ol' spark is missing.

You should ride your bike though!

Bin him! Huffy, sulky men with fragile egos are not worth the effort. IME.

The biking, Hugh Jackman-alike boyfriend does exist, unfortunately one of them belongs to me, so that's one fewer out there for you. 😉

Yeah but yours wouldn't fit too Jo 😉
It has to ride like minnar 😉

(btw if you and him ride like the atherton family please let me know NOW so I can take some private tutition before I go to scotland 😉 )

He can ride really very well indeed. The only thing I have in common with Rachel Atherton is the biceps...

I concur with you, you are far more attractive than Rachel, and your voice Grrrr ;p

That's a really strange one. I had something I was going to post and then I decided to try and put myself in his shoes - ie if I was going out with Tracey Moseley (however improbable) how would I feel?

It would be very strange to have a lady blow me off the trails (easy SFB) but I think I'd be very proud and determined to be just as good. Then again I am mental about biking and it's a huge part of my life so pretty much nothing would put me off it.

Even thinking through other activities in my head that I like, I'd still be happy if my other half excelled at them. I strongly suspect he's jealous of the fact that you go riding with a bunch of guys, and you all presumably are much better than him so he feels demeaned. If he's as athletic and fit as you say he's probably never been in many situations in his life where he couldn't at least imagine himself on a level pegging with guys around him, added to that he's probably dismissed mtb'ing as less than taxing. I reckon there are ego and trust issues at play.

The question is what do you do? Personally I take him to the gnarliest tech DH run I could find and take him down it, stopping occasionally to scream choice phrases of encouragement at him like "MTFU you little pussy bitch" etc etc etc 😆

Kill or cure.

GF last night commented that my arms are now 'too big'. WTF, no I don't mean bingo wings. I took it as a huge compliment however I know she didnt mean it as such 🙁

[i]i want a hugh jackman lookalike who can ride a bike like greg minnaar, wear a suit or a kilt whenever the fancy takes me and all the usual kind to animals/kids etc[/i]

Well, hop on baby.

Oh, actually, sorry, I thought you said Hugh Laurie. Never mind.

Yes, date Nettles, he's lovely.

MisterGnar, you wouldn't know if a lady were to be better than you at riding would you. Seeing as you never want to ride with any. 😉

Seriously though, it does need addressing. You can't let him stop you doing the hobby you love or you'll resent him. Either he has to deal with you riding without him, and you can't feel guilty about it, or he needs to deal with you being better at it than him.

FWIW, GF was dead proud of me when I beat him at mayhem last year. There'd have been problems if not!

mrsflash

MisterGnar, you wouldn't know if a lady were to be better than you at riding would you. Seeing as you never want to ride with any. [;)]

Hey c'mon now I thought we put that one to bed ages ago.....and I think my post just there was a fairly good and honest one 😉

[i](and I can tell by their times at the NPS how the ladies stack up to me anyway)[/i]

Hugh Laurie rocks.

MisterGnar I was just messing. 🙂

I know but I had to cover my ass just in case 😛

I think i'm too picky - i want a hugh jackman lookalike who can ride a bike like greg minnaar, wear a suit or a kilt whenever the fancy takes me and all the usual kind to animals/kids etc! Yes in fact, i am too picky

LOL, you think? 😉

Honestly though, from another 29 year old (in a couple of months anyway) mountain biker (though sadly not in Aberdeen, I read your profile though!) who is at the moment single, he does sound a bit of a nightmare. Blokes can be very fragile and insecure, but we're not all like that. So avoid the ones that are... I can't imagine anything better than a girl who loves riding bikes, but not only that, if she was better than me it would give me even more incentive to go out riding with her as I'd get to watch her lovely arse all day long!!! haha

As Jojo says, guys with fragile egos really just aren't bothering with, especially as enough of us out here are single, into mountain biking, don't have fragile egos, can ride a bike pretty well (I'm not Greg Minaar, but I'm not bad on a bike). But there ain't many of us look like Hugh Jackman (I'm "rugged" but not that rugged), and whilst I do look bloody good in a suit if I do say so myself, there ain't no way I'm donning a Kilt for anyone! That and Aberdeen is 500 miles away is a non starter really eh... 😕

[i]Yes, date Nettles, he's lovely.[/i]

Sheesh, you took your time.

Well, at least if she doesn't want it looks like Hora might.

ain't you the lucky one then nettles! BTW, you are prepared to get outridden by a girl again on holiday aren't you?? 😉

hora might? Erm I havent to reached foxylaydee's criteria. Not even on one point sadly. I'd like to think Im the gay(safe)friend of girls, they drop their guard and I pounce (well suggest) 🙁

Yep, I'm prepared. I don't know if I'm outridden, or am simply a gentleman and let you go first 🙂

we'll call it that for the sake of your fragile ego shall we?

foxylaydee: book a weekend away at/near a trail centre somewhere (without telling him what you're doing).
Then post on here saying that you're riding [insert name of trail centre]and would like some company. Then show him the thread with the hundreds of STWers queuing up to meet/ride with you and that'll get him down there with you. And after the ride (just the 2 of you obviously) you surprise him by heading back to the nice B&B/hotel. He will then associate going riding with you to nice weekends away, meals out and a romantic night in a B&B.

Or alternatively he'll be sulking at being duped into a days MTBing, nursing an injury from where he's fallen off and your romantic night away will be spent not getting any sex and listening to him moan... 😉

Someone mentioned sex?

I used to work with a bloke who would refuse to do anything that his wife was better than him at. I found it hilarious, seeing as he was really successful and intelligent, but he couldn't face being beaten by his wife at anything. Apparently she really enjoyed ten-pin bowling but doesn't go now as she is way better than him.

I would find out whether he just doesn't enjoy it (not everyone has to) or whether it is the ego thing.
One of my riding friends is a girl and she pretty much beats me at everything. She rides techy stuff slower than me, but seems to assess it better and therefore gets down stuff that I roar up to and then halt at in fear. She has also beaten me in pretty much every race we've done, although the tide is now beginning to turn. I don't care if she is faster than me or not.

For what it's worth my partner has no interest in mountain biking per se, although she does have a Spesh Myka and we go cycling together, which she enjoys. She just isn't into the whole adrenaline thing which is fine. I have time to do my stuff and she has time to do hers. I go for weekends away, have been on one biking hol (to Spain) with mates and am going again this yr and I ride at least once a week over in Thetford (which is the whole evening ruled out as it's 1hr 20 mins away).
But, I don't think it causes any problems. It's all about compromise.

😆 these posts are really funny and are distracting me from the matter at hand 🙂 thanks for all the constructive comments though! There are indeed alot of plus points to this man but without boring you all with the ins and outs of our relationship thus far, i get the distinct impression that he may turn out to be quite controlling 🙁 Now that is all fair and good in certain rooms of the house but not when it comes between me and my Lapierre! Damn men....damn you all! Except the yummy ones........

La Pierre......don't tell me you've got a Zesty??!! I will be incredibly jealous (just don't tell the Spesh. it will hurt her ageing feelings!)

winner.........but not him it seems!

no, its a spicy 😈

So 9/10 isn't bad eh?

You went out for a few months and knew this?

Maybe he should do something with his weekends? he wants attention so he makes you feel guilty and you avoid him...

Talk to him not the dam forum!

Have you seen the face of women dragged along by the guy on a mtb ride-you can tell who enjoys it and hates it.

My Gf won't ride a bike for England, so what? as long as everything else is ok. She's a psychologist and I'm a bichemist-we're different in some areas but our values are the same.

You don't what you've got till its gone.

Dump him and go out with a fat bloke from STW forum...so he'll ride with you-maybe but he's fat, has issues and as kind as Saddam and masculine as the Mr Muscle cleaner ads.

He also posts on the forum all day...

Communication is needed for both of you. Riding is your thing and he should have his own thing too. Myabe swap once in a while?

Work it out together and share!

Hope you sort it out.

Hmmmm, loving the spicy's.

Saw a wsd lappy last week, very pretty and gurly

Dump him and go out with a fat bloke from STW forum...so he'll ride with you-maybe but he's fat, has issues and as kind as Saddam and masculine as the Mr Muscle cleaner ads.

Who hell he?

[i]Dump him and go out with a fat bloke from STW forum...so he'll ride with you-maybe but he's fat, has issues and as kind as Saddam and masculine as the Mr Muscle cleaner ads[/i]

Pretty accurate. Must add [b]has problems/anger issues with women due to previous experiences.[/b]

sharki- yea mine is wsd.....it is sublime 🙂

Pic faylaydee? (of the bike, not the man)

is he dumped yet?

im not kind, sexy or particularly masculine, but feel free to add me to the end of your current list.

I dont have a pic of it yet taken on the trail -as i landed on my camera 2 weeks ago and it broke 🙁 Looked like this in the shop though :
[img] [/img]