Forum menu
My wife and I have a lovely baby boy, coming up on 5 years old. My wife is intimating that she might want another, but I'm not so certain.
My logic is that we've missed the window where they really might've played well together, there's no guarantee that we'll get another boy or that they'll like the same things...I also don't relish the idea of the hitting the reset button. On the other side, my son would have a sibling for later life...
When did you decide to stop?
0. And yes.
0 yes
0 yes
A lot. Yes.
2 and yes. Still feel a little guilty to this day as number 2 was unexpected and we considered "the options" as we had a perfect little life as just the three of us. Turns out he's a legend and I cannot imagine life without him. That was 11 years ago, he arrived for my 30th year.
2 (3yo boy and 7wk old girl), my wife wanted 3, but I only want 2, however after the really bad morning sickness she's agreed that 2 is enough! I'll be seeing a brick wielding Dr soon 😯
2. yes, now they are adults. 25 and 19
We have 2, with a 4 year gap, and they play together fine (older boy, younger girl). You haven't missed any kind of 'window', don't worry, and there's no reason why they should have to like the same things.
(2, yes).
2 (Boy-3 & 1/2 & Girl-9 months) . Yes, mostly.
2 and it is perfect for us, both boys 22 months apart, they are awesome kids and have made my life.
I have 1. I wouldn't want another.
2 cats is perfect for us..
[url= https://c5.staticflickr.com/6/5485/10741113124_59dd8ceebe.jp g" target="_blank">https://c5.staticflickr.com/6/5485/10741113124_59dd8ceebe.jp g"/> [/img][/url][url= https://flic.kr/p/hna1HA ]George and Jeff by the fire[/url] by [url= https://www.flickr.com/photos/brf/ ]Ben Freeman[/url], on Flickr
1
We'd have liked 2 or 3 but nature had other opinions.
2, 22 months apart. 17 and 19 now, both good pals and get on.
Wouldn't be like the family up the road - 6 boys and counting - she really wants a girl. The oldest is out of school and they are still trying!
2.
We were quite happy with 1, in fact we planned to stick at 1. I had a sudden vision of Christmas 2025 with a single sulky teenager being outnumbered. Decided it would be fair to even up the sides.
2 yes.
Girl arrived that arrived nearly 5 years after the boy.
They played together on the xbox etc but not much on 'pretend' games.
He's nearly 20 now and she's 14, they chat and do 'stuff' with us as a family but don't 'hang out'. I didn't hang out with my brother much when we were teens and there's only 15 months between us. Once you get past a certain age you're 'freinds' with a sibling, not 'playmates' so the age gap becomes irrelevant.
In summary, have another and don't let the age gap put you off.
As an aside, we got a dog recently and that's had a more profound effect on our lives than having a second child when the other one was five....
0, Yes
4
ermm......
we had 2 boys aged 3 & 5, both of us nearly 40
when my wife convinced me to have a 3rd, i wasnt so keen tbh, but i love my wife so here goes
then turns out it was twins!!! (boy & girl)
it was tough at first and I was a bit annoyed tbh
4 months in now , ive done a few races lately and getting regular night rides, over the summer i did glentress green with the 2 older boys, which was ace
and importantly they are both sleeping through the night
all of a sudden it seems brilliant, Ive become a huge softie again and its great seeing all 4 kids interacting together
so emphatically no regrets!
[i]Wouldn't be like the family up the road - 6 boys and counting - she really wants a girl. The oldest is out of school and they are still trying! [/i]
I had a friend who knew someone. They already had 5 girls. "Let's try once more and see if we have a boy". Twin girls.
3 and no. Wish we'd started earlier...
Mental amount of work / stress / worry / sleepless nights / arguing / fretting....but it's getting better by the day. Doing the GGW tomorrow with my oldest (15) and then the Cairngorm loop in the Oct week. We'll argue, fight, sulk, probably belt eachother around the lugs a few times (metiforically speaking of course) but the rewards, friendship, companionship FAR exceeds all the crap.
2, yes.
Wouldn't want any more, the world is busy enough as it is.
2 girls and yes, very.
They are 3 years apart, they do play together and number two is just about right for inheriting all number ones old clothes and toys 🙂
Always wanted two kids. Probably because me and the missus both have siblings that we like. And three kids would just be too much for us.
Completely understand how you feel, I knew that if I didn't have a second pdq then it wouldn't happen.
One of each, just under 2 years between them. Oldest is a pretty serious roadie.
Follow your instincts, they're normally right.
2 (twins) and not entirely sure
We are seeing a doc shortly (we need IVF) as my wife would like another, but ours are 7 now so would be 8/9 before another one comes along (should it happen).
3 girls with a 7 year gap between each. Not how we planned it but its great.
2, 2 yrs appart, and yes.
6 years would be a pretty big gap. Think the longer it goes the harder it is it hit that reset button. A 4yo and 2yo here and I'd not want to go back and do the newborn thing again now.
We have 2 (boy and girl) 19 months apart.
They played together when younger but they are both now teenagers and so each has their own circle of friends.
I'm very glad we have two as I suspect with one there's a risk of all parental hopes, dreams, fears etc being focused on one child; at least with more than one it's a bit less pressure for them!
Oh and they're great.
2 kids, 1 of each and yes.
0 dunno.
We decided to stop at 5, having lost one, our second, which brought about two more in quick succession, nothing worse than losing a child at 3 months, the mrs decided to stop after a 9 year break and an ahem drunken unguarded moment brought about the baby who's now just left home and it's pretty quiet around here. Went through the fostering process and got turned down because of inappropriate social media comments made by yours truly, but in all honesty fostering isn't what we thought it was, it's not about parenting it's a job more akin to being a prison warder these days.
Whatever, our kids, don't regret any of them or the considerable cost, what other purpose is there in life but to continue the species with as reasonable examples as it is in your gift to deliver.
3, one of each gender.
2, yes. 20months apart, so they [s]fight constantly[/s] play in a competitive manner together.
1. Wanted 0, but like everyone says, no regrets. 1 is good. Probably could've coped with 2, but that ain't happening now!
3 boys - 7, 6 and 2. Every day is spent desperately trying to tire them out, shouting at no-one as they don't listen, tidying/washing/cleaning/feeding (why can't boys stop eating!), breaking up fights and so on. Any more than 1 kid and you stop being a parent and start being a referee!
Happy - mostly 😉
2 girls. and love them both to bits. Now they're a bit older, they're good mates and seem to enjoy each others company. They're always doing stuff together.
However, yesterday me and Mrs Binners went for out lunch. We walked into a place with a large number of yummy mummy's with their screaming babies. We turned round, walked straight back out, and went somewhere else. I couldn't be bothered with all that shit again. Not a chance! 🙂
2, boy 2 and girl 9.
I was definitely stopping at 1. The wife was really hoping for 3, but at least 2. I eventually relented and we had a second. It was as much for the daugher as anything, so she will have that sibling for life. Looking back I think doing a fair bit of her growing up as an only child hasn't been the best thing for her personally, though every child is different.
It's been hard having to reset back to little one again, especially when the older one was getting to the point of being able to do more stuff with us, bike rides, walks, climbing, etc. Plus being over 40 the sleepless nights seem harder to take. On the other hand daughter being that bit older she was fairly independent (getting dressed, having breakfast, etc) and actually able to help with the little one.
Even with a big age gap they do play together, well more the older one playing with and entertaining the younger. She will read him stories etc. He gets more freedom than she did as a similar age as he gets to go with big sis in the play park etc. They can also fight and squabble too. He won't take any shit.
In hindsight if I had ever intended to have two then I would have had them closer together. Though that doesn't always make the siblings closer - me and my brother are 3 years apart and hardly speak since we left home, no animosity, just not close, never have been.
I wouldn't be without the little fella now. He's awesome. So no, you haven't missed a window.
0 - delighted
Whatever, our kids, don't regret any of them or the considerable cost, what other purpose is there in life but to continue the species with as reasonable examples as it is in your gift to deliver.
Err try and make the world a better place? Make people happy?
General question to those who had > 2 children (excluding children from previous relationship s). Did population increase enter into the decision making process or was it a not even a consideration?
3 - Happy
10, 9 , 3. The 9 and 3 year old do the most playing together unless you count kicking and shouting so there's no real "window" I'd say, just different personalities.
They all like bikes! Happy days.
as many as you can look after (responsibly)
0, most definitely happy with my life choice.
Did population increase enter into the decision making process or was it a not even a consideration?
Sort of, and we do try to minimise our "impact" as much as we can. However, Western populations are not really increasing are they? Kind of pale into insignificance against India, China etc.
3 - happy
9 year old boy, 4 year old girl and 2 year old boy
the big one has always been good as gold
middle one is good too but is prone to occasional tantrums and sulks...well she is a girl
little one is a naughty mischievous little git and will pick on the other 2 whenever he feels like it
Never particularly fussed about kids of my own.
One ex wanted to move to Australia then have kids.
Aus was the deal breaker, not the kids!
Have 3 wonderful nieces in their 20's who I've known all their lives and
have two adult step-daughters, now in their early 30's.
Amazingly I now have shares in a grand daughter.
🙂
Basically, most of the good bits, without the hassle.