[Closed] I now have to commit suicide.

Disown him.

I think that's a concept picture. The real one doesn't have a front bumper like that.

Jump under the front wheels as its being delivered?

Definitely a concept picture. The real one is much nicer.

Given the OP's feelings and proclamations on automobiles in general, I think it's hilarious.

Drac, you live in/near Alnwick don't you?

So do my parents.........

Nah, just set a few ground rules.

1. He has to park a couple of streets away when he visits

2. You will only go in it wearing shades, baseball hat etc

Surely you should kill it, not yourself. I think train would be most satisfying, but hard to achieve without endangering others. Shoot it.

Does he still run you to school or something? Aren't old people weird?

I won't be seen DEAD in it.

Thank GOD they live 360 miles away!

Drac, you live in/near Alnwick don't you?

So do my parents.........

Want me to take care of it with the Ambulance?

From Blackshaws then?

[url= http://www.ehow.com/how_5160753_divorce-parents.html ]Hows about divorcing them instead?[/url]

Grounds: Being (verbally or) mentally abused by one or both of your parents;

Drac, kill it if you can please!

Fratricide, shoorly? 😉

I think you need to more concerned about what he'll do next now that dementia has so clearly set in 😉

You´ll have to buy a new Orange Five in that flourescent yellow they have.
Park it beside the car to outshine your dad....and blind passers-by.

Is he a successful hairdresser? If so, then fine. If not, hahahahahahahahahaha.

Oh, go on then.

I think if your parents live 360 miles away you'll probably be fine...

Nice colour.......

Vile pointless cars regardless of colour. Not a bad shade for an early '90's MTB revivalist though.

Fratricide, shoorly?

Kill his brother? Seems a bit harsh.

its beautiful! 😯

PeterPoddy - Member
Oh. My. God.

Shotgun, pills, or train?

Shame... 😀

I saw a juke the other day and initially assumed it had been in an accident. It had not. But maybe it would help.

it is a damn site better than the mini clubman - now that is ugly - nothing endearing about it at all.

Oh yeah, Patricide not Fratricide. 😳 It's been a long day.

Then again, why not just kill your brother anyway. He's probably far better looking than you. 😈

UKAEA are always looking for ways to test their transport containers. Maybe suggest that they put one on a bullet train and run it into the car.

it is a damn site better than the mini clubman - now that is ugly - nothing endearing about it at all.

Yes. I should be thankful it's only the SECOND ugliest car in production I suppose!

Yes. I should be thankful it's only the SECOND ugliest car in production I suppose!

Third.

[img] [/img]
I bet your brother drives one of these.

learn from it peter, take a long hard look at your dad and ask yourself..
how can i stop this happening to me? 😯

[img] [/img]

Could be worse than the Clubman or the nissan, he could have bought one of these monstrosities:
[img] [/img]

It actually looks worse in real life than that picture. I was behind one yesterday and it looks like the Top Gear crew have dropped a piano on a normal Range Rover.

Of course the real danger is if he kicks the bucket and you inherit it.

Fair play to your Dad! A car that looks radical enough to devide opinion gets my vote 😆

ps - as long as it's not a diesel, eh, PP?

Is that a Nissan Joke ?

Spelunker magazine likes it 🙂

They reckon it's like looking out of a cave .... boom tish!

Flashy, sorry, yes, I read countryman not clubman. The clubman us OK.

Reluctant, we nearly bought a diesel at the weekend actually, as I'm doing the miles to make it pay.

I now know for a fact that Fiat diesels are better to drive than VW ones. Not hard to be fair.....

They're ok those Nissan Jukes, a tidy little turbodiesel manual would be great fun to drive. Better than the deathly tedium of the alternatives anyway.

Alternatives????

For that money he could have had a nice used Jag or an Alfa!!!

That is hilarious PP!! Dont't let anyone tell you they're ok really, cos they ain't. Even Nissan know it - have you noticed even the advert is filmed in the dark 😀

The Juke only makes me feel nauseous. The Countryman makes me angry for some reason. I'm a passive man, but I actually want to have a fight with it.

For that money he could have had a nice used Jag or an Alfa!!!

Which would cost twice as much to run each year when you take into account insurance, road tax, maintenance etc. Alfas are crap anyway, I don't get the fuss

Yep - I meant countryman earlier - there is a white one locally - it is unbelievable.

There is also a Juke locally and it is quite reasonable compared, and better than many of the recent BMWs with that awful boot.

Alfas are crap anyway, I don't get the fuss

wrong thread - I think you meant this for the joke thread. You must be a passat driver.

LOL @ DezB 🙂

Which would cost twice as much to run each year when you take into account insurance, road tax, maintenance etc. Alfas are crap anyway, I don't get the fuss

He could easily afford it. He could afford to run an Aston if he wanted to. He does 6000 miles a year.

And you have no soul! 😛

People who think Alfas are great "drivers' cars" have never driven proper drivers' cars is all I'm saying. Sure they might be better to drive than a boggo golf or peugeot or whatever but they've always left me asking what the fuss is about.