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@globalti- I have been there myself more than once in the past and I know how it feels but it will pass. Please talk to your dr. Take care.
Struggling a bit here.
As per a load of the above posts I don't really have any right to moan, so many people have things so much worse than I do but it is tough going right now.
On the positive side, my job can be done from home and people are buying what we are selling so that doesn't seem to be a worry, but on the negative side I don't take well to working or being on my own, I much prefer going to the office and having real conversations with people face to face. I had a job previously where I was able to work 4 days a week condensed hours, WFH or in the office on my own and I left that job within the year as it was not good for me mentally. Now I have not been to the office since I think February and we are not allowed back until at least early next year. I'm also working on something fairly new with no real deadlines to work to in the short term so its hard to get motivated on that front.
I also got diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis around July time and am starting out on the treatment for that. Previously I would go running 3 or 4 times a week, hit the gym, go swimming, hiking, all sorts as I've always been a bit of a restless hyperactive kind of guy, and along with that I've always been a bit of a big drinker. Now, between the arthritis and the medication to treat it I am unable to do any form of exercise beyond walking the dog on a good day, and then I cant drink anything at all for a few months while I get used to the tablets, tablets that have me feeling sick from Sunday night through to maybe Tuesday morning each week, then pretty shattered most of Tuesday. On the positive side here they doctors say the tablets are working and on some days I feel pretty normal, but then on other seemingly random days I struggle to even pick up the kettle to make a cup of tea. When the days that are bad from a symptoms perspective overlap with the days where I am feeling sick and tired things are pretty grim. Apparently the process of getting the medication settled and things becoming stable takes between 3 and 6 months so not endless, but long enough that the short term outlook isn't to exciting.
Now I write this down it all feels pretty trivial, especially compared to the people above who have real stresses and would kill to just have boredom to deal with but it is getting to me far more than being under stress seemed to
We fall into these shit situations and we don’t realise how much they weigh us down, but they do.
So true
Interesting how every contributor to this thread plays down their problems.
My GP put me on Finasteride to shrink my prostate while awaiting a urology appointment but now I've found a testicular lump, which the GP has diagnosed over the phone as an epididymis infection. He has given me a week course of Doxy, which you have to take then sit upright for an hour to protect your aesophagus. Despite this I can feel the return of the old heartburn, which I had sorted up to now. GP will examine the lump next Monday. The side effect of living all day in a state of severe stress with a HR hovering in the 80s plus the Finasteride is the disappearance of any interest in sex, I'm unable to get an erection and I believe the cessation of ejeculation has caused the build up of semen, which has become infected. So in the urinary department things are very bad.
A known side-effect of antibiotics like Cipro and doxy especially in over 60s is that they massively increase the likelihood of ruptured tendons especially Achilles. On day 1 I woke up with renewed tennis elbow, an old recurring problem. Fragile tendons at the last thing I need when we are about to move into this accursed new house.
I'm into my third week on Mirtazapine, which helps my mood but doesn't prevent anxiety and stress especially as I'm bored and sit on the sofa all day with nothing to do. At least I've got the mice beaten but the place still stinks of mouse piss. The forecast is now for unrelenting rain for the next 10 days.
I remain convinced that selling our lovely house in Lancashire and embarking on this Scottish project has been a monumental error. It has burned up almost all our money. So far Mrs GTi and I have rubbed along as two people sharing the same house in need of company but yesterday after I wavered in my committment in a meeting with the builder she lost it in a big way, I've never seen her so angry.
Now GTi junior stuck in halls at MMU is showing signs of depression. He wanted to come home last weekend and could have done if we had still been in Lancashire. If he shows up here, neighbours will dob us in to the Police as they have already with other newcomers. We don't know what will happen at Christmss, Mrs GTi clings to the belief we will be in the house but we've got to get it finished, get moved in and now there's a fear that our possessions are going mildewey stuck in a cold damp sea container. How I rue the fact that in march we failed to stop this ill-conceived project to build a too large ostentatious house amongst modest neighbours who have lived here for many generations.
Honestly if I could cease to exist without causing massive distress to my family and friends I would happily take the option.
How am I doing? Awful and I wake up crying every morning and wonder if today will be the day it pluck up courage to finish it. Honest answer.
@FFJA - so sorry to hear this. Pls do get some help.
I've found my local crisis team really good and they've put me onto some CBT help. Life is still a struggle tbh but I'm back from the brink hopefully.
Get someone else to call them if you can't face it.
@globalti same goes for you, are you getting any mental health help at the moment?
@FFJA - I remember the thread you posted after you got flooded and how many people were rooting for you, and we still are. It takes a lot of bravery even to post up on here how you're feeling. Is there anyone in the village you can chat to or ask to pop up and say hi in person?
The local surgery website does have a direct number for a crisis team, and, if you felt able, I'm sure they, or just your local GP, would be able to offer a stackload of support.
Best wishes
Martin.
I/we as a family are generally doing well.
The good
Partner and I were designated as key workers so continued through lockdown on a pretty normal basis.
Managed to get away for a week during the Summer and have just came back from a week on the Isle of Lewis.
The bad
Oldest daughter has had CoVid she is through the worst of it but has some post viral fatigue.
Travelling back from Lewis we have came into close contact with someone who has tested positive and the Protect Scotland App has told us to self isolate.
Could be a lot worse, stay safe everyone.
I've been put on Mirtazapine and I'm seeing a therapist privately once a week.
A few weeks ago the GP put me on Finasteride to shrink my prostate. Semen production has stopped and now I have a painful lump on the left testicle for which I'm on doxy, the lump is probably stale infected semen. Doxy has a bad reputation for causing tendinitis and tendon ruptures especially in over 60s. This morning I have the familiar burn of tendinitis in both knees, both elbows and a wrist. The effect lasts 6 months from day 2 of the course and mid December we are supposed to be moving into a new house.
If I want married with a child I would also be contemplating ending my life now.
globalti that sounds undoubtedly shit, sorry fella. I'm glad you are getting help though
I'm really struggling today too, difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. My job is totally ****ed for the foreseeable future (wedding and event photographer) and savings are disappearing. Guess I'll have to fight for shitty zero hours delivery jobs along with everyone else.
Not as bad as some of you but I'm just in a state of constant irritation.
Got a lot on work n home wise but it's now getting to me.
It's all toss.
Does anybody else get this? You only sleep a couple of hours a night and when you drift off on the sofa you get a minute or two of snoring before waking with a jerk with the horrible realisation that nothing has changed and life is still shite. So dozing becomes something you try to avoid.
Came on here to have a bit of a moan then realised I have nothing at all to moan about. Stay safe everyone and although it's tough for some of you right now it will get better.
Interesting how every contributor to this thread plays down their problems.
you know I noticed this too and it's really not helpful. That sort of thought process lead me to some dark places a few years back and bizarrely I'm probably now one of the people that others compare themselves to (se earlier in the thread for details) and I don't really understand why.
I suppose people have difficulty in accepting that their problems and real and impact them directly. Your problmes are no less real just because someone else is having a harder time than you.
Am I allowed to say on this thread that eveythings is fine thanks?
Feel for those going through a tough time though 🙁