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[Closed] Help Recalibrate My Moral Compass

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[#6109222]

I find I'm becoming less and less tolerant of drivel I hear from people, particularly on Facebook.

This morning, it was "On this day, 21 years ago, heaven gained a new star... I MISS YOU MUM! The pain is greater than ever... :("

For starters, since when did facebook become a portal for speaking to the dead. Secondly, it was 21 years ago... Isn't it about time you pulled yourself together??

Anyway, it seems to take more and more will power not to post an inappropriate comment, I've even found myself - in moments of weakness - clicking the "like" button when I see this mawkish emotional diarrhea.

I fear it's only a matter of time before my inner sociopath overwhelms any self-restraint I might have. Apart from deleting facebook; or having a purge of all the bed-wetting professional grievers, how can I become more tolerant of this sort of crap???


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:49 am
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I find I'm becoming less and less tolerant of drivel I hear from people, particularly on Facebook

I can think of an easy solution to the Facebook bit. Becoming more tolerant is quite a bit harder and I'm not sure from the general tone of your post you're ready to commit to the effort required.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:51 am
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[i]how can I become more tolerant of this sort of crap??? [/i]

Have you considered empathy?

There's people I knew who died a long time ago and sometimes I think about them when something triggers a memory.

I don't chose to shout about it on social media but I understand why someone would feel like that after 21 years and whilst their way of expressing it wouldn't be mine I also wouldn't think 'silly bint' and de-friend them as a result of reading it.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:52 am
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Shibs - 2 mins since you became a miserable old sod, thinking of you, peace out, bro


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:53 am
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Have you considered empathy?

๐Ÿ™‚

Shibs - 2 mins since you became a miserable old sod, thinking of you, peace out, bro

๐Ÿ™‚


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:54 am
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I've never been one for empathy, or any of the weaknesses for that matter...


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:56 am
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Repost this picture of a candle/rose/cute fluffy kitten if you know a Facebook user who is fighting the urge to become a miserable old sod.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:56 am
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it was 21 years ago... Isn't it about time you pulled yourself together??

That's cold, man.

Perhaps you should have a loved one die, see how that feels 20 years later?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:57 am
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I set fire to the flowers on those little shrines that appear by the side of the road, to mark the death of a car thief in a police chase


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:58 am
 hora
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People find comfort in coping. Some of us weren't that close to our parents. I know a girl who is incredibly close to her parents. She can sit for days with him just chilling, not saying much happy.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:58 am
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Almost 5 years since I came on here to ask a question about mountain biking.
I miss those days of innocence.
I want it back.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 10:59 am
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Perhaps you should have a loved one die, see how that feels 20 years later?

Bizarrely, the overwhelming majority of humans - myself included - lose our loved ones. It's down to the fact that our parents, grandparents, and lots of other relatives are all a little bit older than us. So, statistically, they're going to slip those surly bonds before us.

I've lost lots of relatives, and I'll probably lose lots more, but I don't post shite like that on Facebook 20-odd years later! Or ever for that matter!


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:00 am
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but I don't post shite like that on Facebook 20-odd years later! Or ever for that matter!

I feel really sorry that you have to block it all in and feel you can't share your pain.....


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:02 am
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My mum died 25 years ago in July from cancer. She was 36, I was 16. She suffered more than I thought possible. I miss her, but the pain went a long long time ago. The post listed above on Facebook is obviously just rhetoric put forward to illicit public sympathy and come across as a wounded person who clearly cares about such things more than you or I, and we couldn't possible ever feel such grief and tragedy as they've been through. If someone genuinely hasn't gotten over a death 20 years later, I strongly advise some sort of counselling.

The wife is Greek, when there is a death in their family all the women engage in very public and extended displays of grief, dressing in black for a year blah blah blah. All clearly intended to show they that person grieves far more then the next. It's ridiculous. It's one thing to feel the pain of loss, the need to express it publicly is quite different altogether.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:02 am
 Doug
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Flag it as spam. Problem solved one way or another.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:02 am
 hora
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I still miss/have the memories of an ex from 20yrs ago who I finished with.

Does that make me abit wet? We are human.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:03 am
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I set fire to the flowers on those little shrines that appear by the side of the road, to mark the death of a car thief in a police chases

Not if I see it first! Don't get me started on floral tributes... Why do chavs gaffer tape garage-forecourt flowers to the lamppost after some 15-year-old pot-smoking scrote loses control of his moped because his waist-band is round his knees?? The only flowers he ever liked were dried, crumbled and wrapped in Rizlas!!


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:04 am
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when did facebook become a portal for speaking to the dead.

Ha ha I'm gonna post that on someone's FB page always bleatering on about the dead seems to care more about them than her own family.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:04 am
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I still miss/have the memories of an ex from 20yrs ago who I finished with.

you know that Binners still posts on here?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:05 am
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You OK hun ? xxx


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:05 am
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you're an emotional cripple IMO..
Now get your arse on Facebook and shine a candle in the wind til you feel the pain..


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:05 am
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Have you been putting crystal meth on your cornflakes again Hora?

[img] [/img]

Seriously - you need to get over me and move on


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:06 am
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I don't chose to shout about it on social media but I understand why someone would feel like that after 21 years and whilst their way of expressing it wouldn't be mine.

See, the thing is, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be the sort of thing you'd stand in the street and shout, and I'm also reasonably sure you wouldn't say it to a stranger in a pub (well - maybe you would after a few jars). But then - maybe that's what social media's about, saying the things in public you wouldn't say in private?

I think what I'm trying to say is, I don't know.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:08 am
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[i]you need to get over me and move on[/i]

or if getting over is too much of a struggle try and walk round him?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:08 am
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Have you ever tried hitting your testicles with the heel of your shoe?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:09 am
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Bizarrely, the overwhelming majority of humans - myself included - lose our loved ones

That has comforted me. I thought I was the only one.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:10 am
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[i]Have you ever tried hitting your testicles with the heel of your shoe?[/i]

tried it?

He did a Vine.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:10 am
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Have you tried smashing your testicles with the heel of your shoe?

Often... But it's not something I post about on Facebook...


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:10 am
 emsz
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The fact that you see empathy as a weakness is a bit odd, don't you think? an ability to understand how someone else feels is a weakness, acording to you when most think its the thing that makes us human


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:18 am
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The fact that you see empathy as a weakness is a bit odd, don't you think?

On the plus side, he'd make an excellent Tory Cabinet minister.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:19 am
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The fact that you see empathy as a weakness is a bit odd, don't you think?

Not as odd as an inability to detect sarcasm ๐Ÿ˜‰


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:20 am
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don't use facebook, problem solved, I manage to live a full life without it.

Fact you're getting angry at facebook, point to a need to have a look at yourself.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:20 am
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Have you tried smashing your testicles with the heel of your shoe?

Often... But it's not something I post about on Facebook...

And thats why facebook will never take off.

ti_pin_man's investment strategy in new and upcoming internet business wasnt always succesful.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:21 am
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illicit public sympathy

Blimey - you may not approve of facebook posting but I think legislation is a bit too far.

but I don't post shite like that on Facebook 20-odd years later!

So we all have to act like you - that right?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:22 am
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I find I'm becoming less and less tolerant of drivel I hear from people

Quite.

Help Recalibrate My Moral Compass

Wait, what?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:24 am
 D0NK
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Public displays of grief don't really do it for me either but I don't get riled by them, chill out and move on (OP not the bereaved)

Dunno how the thread shifted onto it but I don't like roadside floral tributes either, if it's an aforementioned car thief who died in a police chase then I'm not sure they're appropriate. If I ever get mowed down by a clueless driver I certainly don't want flowers at the bloody roadside commemorating it. I don't want a dangerous junction being a reminder of my life. I do think there should be a macabre skull and cross bones or similar roadsign put up for all to see at the location of every road death, might remind a few road users to concentrate a bit more.

Don't think empathy is a weakness tho, wish I had a bit more empathy TBH. Surely "empathy=weakness" marks you out as a bit of a sociopath?


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:25 am
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So we all have to act like you - that right?

You have to admit, the world would be a much better place...


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:25 am
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[i] I do think there should be a macabre skull and cross bones or similar roadsign put up for all to see at the location of every road death, might remind a few road users to concentrate a bit more.[/i]

Ghost bike would be my choice.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:26 am
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I've nothing against people indulging in their love of grief, it's this mawkish one-upmanship that grinds my gears. People seem to want to express the fact that they're in more pain than anyone else that's ever lost someone.

I blame Princess Diana.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:28 am
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The "If you are my true friend you will repost this gushing load of twaddle on your Facebook page" - posts rile me a whole lot more than remembrance posts.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:28 am
 D0NK
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Ghost bike would be my choice.
dunno, possibly, but like I said [i]every[/i] road death should be highlighted not just cyclists.

I blame Princess Diana
well you've finally said something I can relate to.

I presume you mean the diana death media tossfest rather than the person. Quite what sparked it all off I've no idea, maybe a cabal of florists infiltrated the media and instigated the public grief competition.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:29 am
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If they're repeat offenders you can go onto their profile and choose for any content they put up to not display on your timeline.

I had to do it to all my fiends who post their travelling pictures


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:32 am
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Have you ever tried hitting your testicles with the heel of your shoe?

Fantastic! I have just screamed with laughter at this comment...

The other mourners were a little put out.


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:33 am
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I blame Princess Diana

It wasn't Diane's fault. She just got in a car with a pissed bloke! It was Tony Sodding Blair and that stuttering hammy speech. It seemed to give the hard-of-thinking catre blanche to start acting like Americans

Personally I think that anyone displaying Oscars-awards-speech style emotional incontenence, should be slapped around the face with a wet fish until they pull themselves together and remember they're not from bloody San Diego ๐Ÿ‘ฟ


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:34 am
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Well said Binners... This isn't helping recalibrate my moral compass though...


 
Posted : 11/04/2014 11:37 am
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