[Closed] Going to war with your next door neighbours?

If you need to sell your house, and prospective buyers ask if you have had problems with neighbours, wouldn't you like to be able to say "no"?

Its pointless unless you think it will make them move and /or change.

Surely life, if not this place, has taught you that unreasonable people are always unreasonable.

If you need to sell your house, and prospective buyers ask if you have had problems with neighbours, wouldn't you like to be able to say "no"?

I'm sure he will do that anyway.

More details of their passive aggressive transgressions please - have they been parking in your bit of road outside your gaff again? Or playing Classic FM loudly in the garden?

You have to be prepared for a long drawn out war of attrition and hope they aren't prepared to put more effort into it than you.

eating really smelly houmous loudly in the garden? 😉

You're doing it all wrong.

You need to start your 6000 word essay with "long story short....."

And then tell us all in confusing detail, everything that's happened.

The more confusing and difficult to read it is, the more responses you will get.

e- mail me binners and I will type it without any punctuation

It never starts out as a full on war but it can end that way. Even if you win they are still your neighbour. However, neither can you let certain things pass without comment or some degree of pushback.

We've had a border dispute with a "sort of neighbour" who also had a border dispute with their literal next-door neighbour. It's boring but we couldn't have people enlarging their property / creating an access at our expense.

We also had a noise issue at a different property which was actually solved by getting the local authority involved. They are actually legally obliged to follow up in certain circumstances which is great as it's third-party and at their expense. So it depends what the nature of the PITA behaviour is.

Hmm. Some neighbours have recently had a baby, and suddenlt every single tiny noise is a massive issue to them. Well, her, really. It's getting to the point where the rest of us are increasingly biting our tongues at her neuroticness. Of course, nothing direct is said, it's all passive-agressive messages via text and email. My workshop is directly below the 'bay's room', and of course now I 'shod be aware of this issue'. FFS. Put the little brat in another room. And of course, I've done the 'oh I amsorry I hadn't realiseed how mushc the soundtravels' routine, and turned down my music player a teeny fraction as a gestrure of courtesy. Some builders have moved into next door and have been goingat things with a neumatic drill, and various other noisy things. 😆 But best of all, anothernaieghbour's cat shat and pissed in the baby's pram when it was left outside. I'm under strict instructions not to show my amusement of this terrible event. 😆

What would Stalin have done?

I won't go into detail. Needless to say, its as boring, petty and small minded as all the other first world disputes on here. But my normally peace-loving and affable nature is being tried so much that I'm feeling the need for furious righteous vengeance as an alternative

You need to borrow Stoffels neighbours cat. LOL

Best avoided.

There's a cottage for sale a few miles from where I live that has been for sale for years. It simply doesn't sell. It's semi detached, in great condition, and offers good accommodation. But...

The house it's attached to is painted bright purple by the owner following a neighbourly feud with the vendors. It also sports huge wooden braces to the fascia, suggesting that the pair of cottages have structural issues (they don't). Again these were added by the neighbour out of pure malice to scupper the sale of the house.

My point is that there are some strange people about who might be prepared to go one step further than you are.

I vote that"borrow Stoffels neighbours cat" replaces the old wee/shoes/bombers response in such cases.

All those in favour....?

Waste of energy.

http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/just-had-row-with-next-door-neighbour This is my tale of woe.

It ended peacefully because she sent me a card with an apology handwritten inside. I still can't tolerate their excessive use of weed though. It smells out our entire house and other neighbours have complained.

[b]I won't go into detail[/b]. Needless to say, its as boring, petty and small minded as all the other first world disputes on here. But my normally peace-loving and affable nature is being tried so much that I'm feeling the need for furious righteous vengeance as an alternative

The bit in bold is good.

But you need to follow it up with LOTS of detail. Mostly irrelevant.

Stuff about the neighbours weight, height, income, job, attractiveness of wife/husband etc.

And then a little bit about the actual issue, but you need to make it sound like it's more than likely your fault, so everyone can point and laugh at you.

You know this stuff already. Come on, play the game.

My point is that there are some strange people about who might be prepared to go one step further than you are.

Indeed - surely they'd be happy for them to move away? Unless they're worried the new neighbours won't be so easy to bully?!

Can you introduce a rogue Parcel Force worker with a bar code scanner into the story too, please?

You need to take off and nuke the place from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

there are some strange people about

You're not wrong. From the thread Bunnyhop linked to:

Let the child roast and boil until the fresh fall off like freshly roasted piglet. Then lick the tear off the parents cheeks for not taking your advice.

😯

Indeed - surely they'd be happy for them to move away? Unless they're worried the new neighbours won't be so easy to bully?!

I think it may be a sport or hobby for the bully now, so he's not giving up. He'd rather ruin their lives than let them sell up.

Sabotage their butter.

Can you introduce a rogue Parcel Force worker with a bar code scanner into the story too, please?

it doesn't, I just thought it would spice it up a bit if we had alien death ray zappers being wielded by agents of the ex-state monopoly on bearing distribution.

as you were.

[quote=leffeboy ]Can you introduce a rogue Parcel Force worker with a bar code scanner into the story too, please?how does that have any bearing on the matter...
I guess you had to be there.....

Oops, should have added italics :-). Some things are here to stay forever

It is very difficult not to fight back when people try to take advantage of the 'you still have to live next door to us' feeling to get away with whatever the bloody hell they like.

Ultimately it may not be worth it, but it is going to be difficult not to do it.

In our current situation we have a house move precariously poised with our new 'neighbour' doing stuff that may well still balls it up for us.

If he does manage to balls it up I will struggle to speak to him or his missus. If they ask why I don't speak to them I will struggle not to tell them why. I won't be vindictive about it, but I won't be able to be nice just to keep them happy, either..........

[i]should have added italics[/i]

ah, I'm with you now 🙂

I won't be vindictive about it

If I set out down this route, then I'm going to be very, very, very, very vindictive indeed. i don't really see the point otherwise 😀

I won't go into detail. Needless to say, its as boring, petty and small minded as all the other first world disputes on here.

easy to say now binners, neighbourly disputes are not covered by the geneva convention however.

still if you aint got nowt to lose...

If I set out down this route, then I'm going to be very, very, very, very vindictive indeed. i don't really see the point otherwise

[img] [/img]

This thread is useless without in-depth detail.

Sort it out OP.

binners - Member
Your thoughts and experiences please?

You have two possible options.

1. You have an all out war with them until one totally submit. Annihilate them Benelli M4 way or whatever. You win outright. Problem solved ... except you will face the bureaucrats later on.

Or

2. You have a win win situation where both compromise one way or another.

Anything in between is not a good outcome because someone is still brewing with anger and you are only prolonging the inevitable. i.e. more troubles later on.

We chose option 2 because our neighbour and us have no way else to go.

😛

I like my neighbours, they seem like decent folk. I'm sure I creep them out by doing nice things like taking all the black bags full of catlitter out of their garden waste bin, filling it with cuttings that I've mown from the straggly bit of their garden where I sometimes park the car, and then paying for a garden waste sticker so it gets collected.

However if I find they've been emptying the hot-tub into the septic tank I will be forced to reverse the process.

My neighbours are all friendly but I think they might be a bit pissed off at me parking a caravan outside their house...

No point in getting in feuds with neighbours, you'll never win. All you'll succeed in doing is turning your home/peaceful bolthole into something else.

Better to ignore and live a peaceful life than have to worry about what may happen next with your neighbours.

boring, petty and small minded

They've been playing Mumford and Sons on a loop

The only thing that neutralises a bad neighbour is a nasty rival one.

Are the neighbours vegan and did you leave Macburgerking wrappers in their bin 🙂

My next place to live..... the current tenant has informed Mrs Ace to not park across an invisable boundary line on the public unrestricted parking highway as the chap next door sees this as trespass on his property 🙂

Could be 5 years of fun coming up 🙂

My neighbour recently left a bag full of cat shit under our window.
He did this two days after my father in law's funeral.
He had also taken to wandering into our house uninvited to speak to our builder.

I spoke to him about both, asking him to speak to me if he had any issues.
I was quite harsh with him in retrospect, but he hasn't done it since.

He is a nasty passive aggressive little bully - constant snide remarks since we moved in.
I'd bitten my tongue for over a year, but upsetting my partner 2 days after she buried her father just pushed me too far.

I'm glad I did it.

I am assuming that Hora has moved in next door? Well?

Binners, been there, done that...it was not nice and I would like to think I'd do anything to avoid doing it again. 4 years of unpleasantness during which time I used to hate driving home.

For us it was unavoidable, and only got sorted with a proper stand up barny in the street. They were bullys, we stood up to them, they eventually got the message. If the situation is so benign you have to ask the forum, then don't start anything...It can get pretty unpleasant, and it's a lot easier to ratchet the situation up than it its to calm it down.

Think calm thoughts and react slowly 🙂