[Closed] Freaking out with a cricket bat

I was on the floor on my knees with my head in the bed .

Cover dive?

You'd better contact a medium, Mark Ealham perhaps?

cricket bat isn't going to help wi'dat shit

Clicky-ba thundered, and men with crushed heads squirmed on the path. Dreadful sounds echoed up the cliffs as the vanguard of Yahaw Khan's army swung this way and that, retreating and advancing in turns ... In sheer desperation they attacked, but found themselves opposed not only by Chung, but by the twin daggers of the Wolf. He used those blades with a skill that had yet to be equalled. When he struck it was as sure as the attack of a snake. Men dropped. The daggers in the hands of the Wolf were red to their silver hilts.[6]
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_of_Kabul

Second Lieutenant Bill Sampson was an agent of the British Intelligence Corps on the Northwest Frontier.[1][3][4] Disguised as a native[5] (but given away by his blue eyes), he was armed only with two knives,[1] while his Oriental sidekick, Chung, made devastating use of a cricket bat bound with brass, which he called "clicky-ba

 

No cricketing action last night. No babestation either. Still dont know why the telly came on though.

*adds subliminal message about weeing in shoes to thread*

*sits back and waits for tomorrows update*

😀

Maybe the imaginary intruders were just after the car keys - to nick the beamer off of the drive?