Forum search & shortcuts

feeling tingly/guil...
 

[Closed] feeling tingly/guilty....

Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 
[#1401967]

despite the fact i'm very happy with my GF i sometimes can't help letting my mind wander - as is currently the case.

i met some girl from san fran. last year and used to go out for a few drinks in the evening whilst on a course we were doing. we both really hit it off and made each other laugh (dark sense of humour) and just generally enjoyed each others company.

she's been away over winter, but we have stayed in email contact. she said often that we didn't see enough of each other whilst she was here (live in different towns 3 hours apart). thing is she's back and has sent me a few emails asking me to go out for a drink or two with her.

i get a cheeky tingle in me loins and i half-think the feeling is mutual as she keeps badgering me to go out with her (despite the fact she moved over here for her BF and they now have a house together - he is quite straight-laced, but a good guy).

not that i feel anything will/would ever happen between us... but still.

thought it best to get it off my chest here than with the GF....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:22 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

TW*T


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:23 pm
Posts: 41395
Free Member
 

Bin it.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:23 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

She is with someone and wants to wander? You are with someone and want to wander?

Sounds like you are made for each other. Until the Next Best Thing comes along.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:24 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Arrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

deja vu


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:25 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Stay away. The way you are heading leads to pain


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:27 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Girls usuly won't talk to me buy ur frend sones nice so I wud ask her if she wants 2 woch a DVD and ete pizza then put sum moves on her ul nevar no if u don't try


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:27 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

no no no no no no!

you've got me wrong! i knew i shouldn't have bothered with this...

NOTHING is going to happen. my GF is fully aware of her existence, as is her fella of mine.

just like each other company and can make each other laugh and smile.....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:28 pm
Posts: 762
Free Member
 

Balls to that.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:30 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

wow, my first time of seeing a Mark Datz post.. 😀

Shag her and have done with it...


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:30 pm
Posts: 8177
Free Member
 

You said some girl gives you the horn, what did we get wrong?


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:31 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ha ha ha 'her fella of mine'

freudian...

is there a bit you are leaving out in this love triangle story?


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:32 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

Mark Datz - Member

Girls usuly won't talk to me buy ur frend sones nice so I wud ask her if she wants 2 woch a DVD and ete pizza then put sum moves on her ul nevar no if u don't try

mark if you talk like you spell i'm surprised anyone talks to you...


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:33 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Be honest with yourself. Or meet up as two couples


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:33 pm
Posts: 10749
Full Member
 

I think Mark's advice is wicked.

Or awesome.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:34 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

tracknicko - Member

ha ha ha 'her fella of mine'

freudian...

is there a bit you are leaving out in this love triangle story?

my GF is fully aware of her existence, as is her fella of mine.

read it in context, perfectly perfect sentence.....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:35 pm
 DrP
Posts: 12117
Free Member
 

Girls usuly won't talk to me buy ur frend sones nice so I wud ask her if she wants 2 woch a DVD and ete pizza then put sum moves on her ul nevar no if u don't try

I put that into google translate - nothing......

DrP


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:35 pm
 ajf
Posts: 632
Free Member
 

Be honest with yourself

I think that is what he is concerned about.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:36 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ah balls. the english language trips me up again.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:37 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

In agreement with TJ, was just about to type a similar thing.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:37 pm
Posts: 7368
Free Member
 

FFS guys! Lighten up.

It's guilty, harmless little secret that gives the OP a bit of a buzz. He's said he doesn't want to take it any further.

Jeez, it's heavy on here today


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:38 pm
Posts: 41395
Free Member
 

yea srt out a gng bng lke wt TJ sys


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:38 pm
Posts: 41892
Free Member
 

Mark Datz - Member
Girls usuly won't talk to me buy ur frend sones nice so I wud ask her if she wants 2 woch a DVD and ete pizza then put sum moves on her ul nevar no if u don't try

A future classic?

I'm waiting for our dear Mark to trully integrate with the forum and threaten to "owin im wiz bomberz"


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:39 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

My crystal ball predicts that this is just the start of your life turning upside down.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:40 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

it's just odd... we've got a lot in common.

both met our other-half in australia whilst backpacking.

both moved to germany because of our other-half (her's couldn't get a green card).

both used to take lots of drugs before moving to germany where such things aren't so readily available.

er.... that might in fact be all we have in common.

oh, and we were on this course together....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:40 pm
Posts: 14774
Free Member
 

Stacks in common there then alpin 😉 Point being that if you feel guilty you probably shouldn't be doing it.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:42 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Meet up as couples, chuck your keys in the bowl........


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:43 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Point being that if you feel guilty you probably shouldn't be doing it.

Or more realistically, its too late.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:43 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

hainey - Member

My crystal ball predicts that this is just the start of your life turning upside down.

it turned long ago and hasn't righted since....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:45 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

it turned long ago and hasn't righted since....

Know how you feel


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:46 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

not that i shouldn't be doing it. just think each of us has this little "what-if" spark going on.....

mmmm.....


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:48 pm
Posts: 39738
Free Member
 

mark datz - are you from banff ?


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:49 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

just think each of us has this little "what-if" spark going on.....

With all sympathy, you're screwed!


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 12:49 pm
 DWH
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

The problem with internet forums is that it provides a ready outlet for dark little thoughts that should remain locked firmly inside your head.

Imagine we're all sat in the pub and an attractive girl walks past. Maybe a few sidelong glances are taken. Perhaps we catch someone else's eye. Eyebrows are raised, a moment is shared and we return to the conversation.

But...

You couldn't let it go at that, "Cor... I'd like to shag her!" you say.

You see? you've gone too far. It's OK to quietly think it in a momentary, passing, [u]deniable[/u] way but it it [i]not[/i] OK so come out with it like that.

I don't think I know you, but I've met a few people off STW and if we ever [i]do[/i] meet I'll always think of you as that low-life that wants to two-time his girlfriend with some American tart.

Elizabeth I declared that she had "no desire to make windows into men's souls" and I'm with her on that, but you've managed to do the job quite satisfactorily all on your own.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:00 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
 

[i]Point being that if you feel guilty you probably shouldn't be doing it.[/i]

I'm not entirely convinced this is correct. I don't really know, as I've certainly never had a well-functioning relationship based on mutual love and trust, but I suspect many, many people are sufficiently bored that the occasional frisson of excitement from thinking about playing around is probably beneficial. I've read on the internet (so it must be true) that many relationships benefit enormously from one party cheating, because the guilt they feel makes them work harder on the relationship. If there's any truth in that at all then the small amount of guilt that comes from vaguely fantasizing about shagging someone when it's almost certainly not really going to happen must be at least mildly beneficial.

Also, and maybe I'm just not very good at converting potential shags into actual ones, simply going out with someone I fancy doesn't for a moment mean that anything to feel genuine guilt about is actually going to occur. If you go into things not intending anything to happen then I' not convinced any guilt is even required. 🙂


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:03 pm
Posts: 2889
Full Member
 

You kinda have 3 choices, don't you:

1. carry on as you are (probably not viable long term)

2. jack it in with the current GF/BF and give it a go (might be fabulous, but is likely to lead to a suspicious relationship because of the way you got together)

3. Stop right now and not risk what you already have. (Boring but easy, or leads to long-term happiness if you and you current GF actually have something).

Only my opinion, nothing more. Not sure what I'd do, if I'm honest, since we all tend to love the excitement of a new relationship despite knowing that it NEVER stays like that forever...


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:03 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
 

[i] that low-life that wants to two-time his girlfriend with some American tart[/i]

Ouch! That's harsh. 😀 😯


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:04 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I'm with Mark... Woch a DVD, ete some pizza and put some moves on her.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:07 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

go for it, you have nothing to lose


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:08 pm
Posts: 13292
Free Member
Topic starter
 

oh shits.... you all think i've fallen for her. i've not. i've a great GF here. we each run on the same wavelength and have the same end goals; she's very supportive, a great cook, a good laugh (also dark sense of humour), very creative and intelligent. and it's been that way for the last (gulp, almost 8) 7 years.

i'm not going to throw it all away for some home-sick septic.... she's also a great girl, but has got a screw or two loose somewhere.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:14 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Girls usuly won't talk to me

tell us something we didn't know 🙂


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:14 pm
Posts: 6
Free Member
 

mebbe sum grls tlk funi lyke da Datz innit? 😉


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:16 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

On the up side she might make a fantastic f*ck buddy! 😉


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:19 pm
Posts: 19
Free Member
 

or do what my mate did, organise a meal/drinks night out with the both partners along as well, wait till you get home, then jump on the bed like a love panther, tap both sides of the bed invitingly and purr "come on guys what about it?" wink.....

sadly his missus punched him full in the face bringing the proceedings to an abrupt halt.


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:23 pm
Posts: 31075
Free Member
 

On the up side she might make a fantastic f*ck buddy!

My thoughts exactly, and on BD's original post, [b]not[/b] his lazt wun!


 
Posted : 11/03/2010 1:40 pm
Page 1 / 3