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Irates of the carribean - Johnny Depp leads an angry crew around some islands
Snakes on a lane - serpents terrorise a country road
Hoe Alone. One night in the life of a lonely prostitute in an almost empty brothel.
Chariots of Fir. A group from Scotland take up the challenge of authentic Roman wagon racing - using only organic, local materials.
Ben Hu? An enigmatic tale of a amnesiac who only remembers his first name - trying to find out who he really is.
The Silence of the Labs - documentary about mute retrievers
War of the Words. A film of the really heated argument between a pacifist and invading martians who haven't developed weapons but are great linguists.
Orgy and Bess - At last, the truth about the 'Virgin Queen'.
Oxcatcher - Bestiality in Ambridge.
Macbet - Gritty drama set in a Glasgow bookies.
Apocalypse No
The peaceniks get their way at last
The files - the story of the files that exist?
Finding Emo - Where all those weirdly made up people in dark clothes went.
Point Beak - Large wading bird fights crime in California.
The Eat of The Night. Detectives from different backgrounds enjoying a meal in a 24 hour restaurant.
Tar Wars. Woodbines take on Gold Leaf in the race for tobacco supremacy
You Only Lie Twice - then the missus finds out and does a Lorena Bobbitt
Debbie Doe Dallas.
Anthropomorphic deer visits Texas.
Tar Wars - Luke competes for road maintenance contracts with a man who later turns out to be his real father (revealed in the sequel when Jed returns).
Intertellar - the life story of a bank clerk behind the archives
One with the wind - Be prepared to be blown away (actually that is another film description entirely)
Danes With Wolves- the true story of Vikings in America.
Eat - val kilmer and Alan Pacino star in the cafe culture thriller in which they critique various eateries in the los Angeles area
The Wizard of Z
- A compilation of Cliff Thorburn's finest safety shots.
Tar Wars
- never has driveway surfacing been so intense
The Passion of the Chris - Chris Brown passionately punches Rihanna in the face
The Izard of Oz - Eddie goes to the antipodies.
Happy Fee - a lawyers delight
Captain America: The Winter Solder - Steve Rogers needs all his superhuman powers to join two workpieces together in the bitter cold.
Ords of Dogtown ..the ord family make a team of skateboarding dogs who dominate the skate scene for many years
Ron Man - Mr Pickering, a biopic.
He Right Stuff - a dyslexic author's tail.
City lickers - 3 unlikely lads become gigolos
The Rays .... East end crime family recruit for there new venture employing only people called Ray , Raymondo, Rayston or Stingray ,gritty drama set in the 1960's starring ray liotta and ray mears
Hotel Wanda - the heartwarming tale of, err... Wanda's hotel.
Carface - Robert DeNiro goes through reconstructive surgery to make him look like a Ford Edsel
Acky brown .biopic about purple akis brother
Ladiator ...true story in which Russell crowd infiltrates a football hooligan gang and falls in love with an alpaca
Schindler's Lit - An underground hero of the war descends into alcoholism.
The Dirty Doze - Telly Savalas, Donald Sutherland, John Cassavetes and some friends have a kip in a ditch.
Star was - it isn't anymore
Twin Arnold Schwarzenegger, quite rightly stays on his island paradise rather than wasting his life searching for his aggravating **** midget of a brother
Depicable me - A touching story of self explanation
The ego movie - Grown men build bigger plastic things than their kids
The ting - Robert Redford cons the cast of Cool Runnings
shat- starring Richard rountree - the story of a badass detective and a dodgy prawn
The **** of Monte Cristo -
Edmond Dantes is guilty after all.
Avata - Northerners express their gratitude.
War of the words - Another day on STW
The Pelican Brie - I didn't even know they produced milk
md max - post apocalyptic driver of a v8 supercharged ambulance
Mad Ax - muddydwarf takes his tool of choice to the outback
Illy Elliot - a lad from a northern town of tea drinkers hides his love of slightly crappy Italian coffee.
Beverly Hills Op - Eddie Murphy gets some huge norks.
Do soldiers
Do soldiers what?
4 hours later
Gripping documentary about being on hold to BT customer service
The **** of Monte Cristo
Who knew BT had a call centre in Monte Cristo?
The lad in the van - Alan Bennett story of north country boy illegally parks in his driveway
American Pi - Teenage maths