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Having moved house 4 times since getting divorced a few years back I have had stuff in storage for a few years, going through it today, clearing out the old junk etc and I have come across 8 years worth of photo album. So I was just wondering what did my fellow divorcees do with all of their pics?
Do I remove any evidence of 8 years of my life, or selectively "cleanse" the pictures?
I'd use photoshop to superimpose kelly brook over the ex, then put them on the wall.
I have all mine in boxes. I don't really agree with the "cleansing" thing - there were some good times and good memories even though it ended in tears.
all went in the bin just like the marriage, no point in holding on to bad memories - it's how I moved on afterwards.
I'd use photoshop to superimpose kelly brook over the ex, then put them on the wall.
I have a photo of a time when the ex- met the current-. I like to look at it to remind myslef what a good decision I made :-))
Interesting question. I'm in a similar position.
[i]Do I remove any evidence of 8 years of my life[/i]
I think that's the key, it all still happened. Unless the memories are too painful, why deny them?
I have thousands of photos of wife and kids - and many happy times - I can't think why I'd want to get rid of them because we fell out!
Put them on all on a huge bonfire with most of her clothes and other possessions (although not her as well, unfortunately).
(Anyone on STW [b]not[/b] divorced?? )
Me, though I've never married.
[i]Anyone on STW not divorced??[/i]
Well, technically, me. But only 'cos we're waiting for the Decree Absolute.
I was also thinking what it must be like for the current lady if she flicked through my photo albums and saw the ex. If they were rather insignficant events then they would go and some would, but there were some land mark holidays with some great memories that weren't neccesarily linked to her, she was just there, like seeing family, abroad, going to Oz etc.
[i](Anyone on STW not divorced?? )[/i]
I have pics of an ex-girlfriend, if the wife found them I would be!! ๐
I ended up just throwing them all out. There was nothing that I really wanted to keep and I felt better after doing it. I even threw the negatives out.
not a divorce but once got a text from the ex saying 'Shame our love didn't burn as brightly as your stuff' along with a photo of our shared possesions on a bonfire.
That was a hoot.
I tend to get rid of pics of ex's as they are like kryptonite to new crumpet.
Married 25 years this year, together for 28.
I was also thinking what it must be like for the current lady if she flicked through my photo albums and saw the ex.
so what? You cannot undo the past!
so what? You cannot undo the past!
No, but any new flames will expect you to forget it. One of many areas where male logic is trumped by female emotion.
[EDIT] All in my personal experience of course, certainly wouldn't wish to offend any ladies reading.
but any new flames will expect you to forget it
I wouldn't want to forget it or her, despite the heartache. Amusingly, my ex-wife flounced out of the house when we had a fling and she found a photo of a girlfriend I'd had meanwhile...
Thats a bit sad. Did you have kids ? Put them away for them, future family history tv shows etc.
And to stand up for women in general it's an insecure female who can't accept that she isn't the first. The best obviously, but who wants to be the practice bird ?
I think it's a mark of good character that people can get on with their exes, although there are limits of taste and diplomany with this !
Any kids? Save the photos for them.
Think it depends on whether you have kids.
If so definately no harm in keeping the pics for them! Stick them in a box and put them in the attic - the current Mrs can't be offended and the kids won't be upset either. Jobs a goodun!
All got whizzed in the bin or deleted unless the kids were on them.
Only photos of us together before kids are on a mates facebook, unfortunately its a group photo of all the lads doing the easter walk to the Pike after getting home from Back to Basics in '92. I wouldnt expect him to take the pic down so ive un tagged & binned him off my contacts list...
As for the remarks about upsetting your current wife, she has to understand that your time with all your exes are what have made you the person you are today, surely?
can you get your virginity restored too ?
can you get your virginity restored too ?
Not necessary ... you didn't know my ex ๐
I was intentionally taking the piss! I wouldn't want a virgin but a woman who knew what she wanted, but the idea that one might seek to expunge one's past is similarly unrealistic.
she has to understand
Oh does she. I'll be sure to let her know that.
[b]Torminalis [/b]- Member
...male logic is trumped by female emotion...
great phrase ๐
To OP, keep the pics if you have children
Nope no kids.
..male logic is trumped by female emotion...
[b]male logic[/b] = oxymoron :o)
but the idea that one might seek to expunge one's past is similarly unrealistic.
F**cking hell! You should meet my ex!
The woman the 18 year old me fell for, and spent half my adult life with , in less then a week ceased to exist, to be replaced with what can only be described as an unrecogniseable heartless monster.
[b]Expunge[/b].
I like that word. It has a nice sound. I'm going to try and use it at least once today. ๐
Elfinsafety= divorced from reality.
Wasnt 18 but same here. Pictures went to the kids rest in the bin. Move on. What makes women change like this?
The woman the 18 year old me fell for, and spent half my adult life with , in less then a week ceased to exist, to be replaced with what can only be described as an unrecogniseable heartless monster.
Posted the nude ones on the internet and chucked the rest away...
Partners strop because you have photos of your ex? Really?
There's a difference, I think, between having photos in a box in a cupboard, and having them on the mantelpiece. Building a shrine in the basement is probably a bad idea too.
I've got a shedload of pictures of old friends, which invariably will have the odd ex here and there. I don't see any point in going through and systematically removing any photos of anyone I happened to play Hide The Sausage with twenty years ago; at the time they may have been lovely or evil by degrees, but time moves on and by now they just don't feature on my radar any more.
That said, I've not got eight years of "me and the wife" pictures taking up acres of room, I'm talking fairly small scale. If I had a wardrobe's worth, I'd probably take 'getting rid' a bit more seriously.
I left all mine with the ex, she wanted them, 5yrs worth of world travel photos too.
Can't say i miss them.
My first wife kept all our photos too.
This is a good thread, not thought much about it before.
'Shame our love didn't burn as brightly as your stuff'
Tourmalis, I'm sorry if that hurt, but it is a brilliant line
Expunge.I like that word. It has a nice sound. I'm going to try and use it at least once today
Excuse me while I wander wildly off topic, but my new word is
Occulting
It's the opposite of flashing. Flashing, mostly on, with bits of off, eg off off off off on off off off off on = flashing
Occulting mostly on with bits of off, eg on on on on off on on on on off = occulting.
it occults when it goes dark
I think I need to get out more
Oh, and I just lost all the stuff, I'm good at that sort of thing
my other half says that all her photos and wedding memorabilia are in her old dears loft... except for the good wedding presents such as chefs knives etc..
one day she will get round to getting rid of them.. probably
EDIT: just found out that her mum has started pimping out loads of the actual wedding accoutrements for other peoples weddings.. birthday parties.. anniversary does etc.. I want a percentage of that action cheeky old duffer..!
Got all the wedding pics in the loft in the leather case they came in, wedding rings in it too just in case the kids want them when they're older, if not I'll make them into a flip book in reverse so I'll see her walk back down the aisle get into the car a f-off leaving me in peace and with all my hair.
if not I'll make them into a flip book in reverse so I'll see her walk back down the aisle get into the car a f-off leaving me in peace and with all my hair
Genius.
Left the wedding albums with the former Mrs MM.
There's the odd photo in the 'box in the attic' which feature said lady, I'd not bin them, that was then, this is now - and, in the 'now' the preset MrsMM does not have an issue with the pictures being there - it was, after all, a part of my life..
Still deciding what to do with the wedding ring though - sat in the same box of memories - no reason whatsoever that I want to keep it - just seems a shame to 'weigh it in' for just scrap value...
OP - my thoughts - if you were going to 'torch the lot' i'm guessing you'd have done it by now, stick em in a box, out of the way for now. If you come back to them in the years to come, and chose to bin them then, then fair enough..
Problem is all my photo's from our 7 years of marriage are stored on my work computer hard drive, so to keep em would mean spending ages moving them onto a file storage site or external hard drive... not sure I can be bothered...
Still the delete key does not hold as much satisfaction as a conflagration
ahh, I always wanted to use that word in a sentence...
Still the delete key does not hold as much satisfaction as a conflagrationahh, I always wanted to use that word in a sentence...
damn, had to google that