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Destined to be sing...
 

Destined to be single forever...

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[#13203559]

I'm in the bad books.  Not been on my bike in 2 weeks due to weather and dad duties.

My son's supposed to be with his mum this weekend, weather looks decent both Saturday and sunday.  The girl I have been kinda seeing for the last couple of months was hinting to meet up.

I'm back at work after 8 wks tomorrow.  Then I just fancy a weekend to myself.  Had my son the whole 8 weeks apart from 4 nights (not complaining, loved every moment).

So, I have kinda said I CBA this weekend.  Not mentioned im planning on riding both Sat and Sunday.  We only met up on Tuesday night anyway.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:23 am
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If she's worth the effort, she'll be fine with you doing what you enjoy. 😀


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:30 am
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So, I have kinda said I CBA this weekend.

...with that approach then defo "Destined to be single forever… "! 🙂


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:36 am
supernova, leffeboy, fasthaggis and 5 people reacted
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Did you tell her can't be arsed, or did you give her the full, very understandable story that you shared with the random strangers on the Internet?


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:38 am
SYZYGY, davros, peekay and 11 people reacted
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Those 3 little words every woman longs to hear....

... can't be arsed


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:43 am
ngnm, hightensionline, blokeuptheroad and 41 people reacted
 Keva
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stick it on Mumsnet and see what sort of a response you get from there....


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:46 am
milan b., aide, sandboy and 19 people reacted
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So, I have kinda said I CBA this weekend.  Not mentioned im planning on riding both Sat and Sunday.  We only met up on Tuesday night anyway.

Excellent attitude. My regular occasional riding mate recently met a woman after what seems like decades being single, but is probably only a couple of years. He's now inconveniently besotted with her and can only bring himself to go riding if she's more than 200 miles away. He could learn a lot from you 🙂


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:47 am
funkmasterp, acidchunks, Kryton57 and 7 people reacted
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Hmm, if she knows you ride a bike, then she may need educating in our 'sport'.  MrsF knew what it entails (although hadn't quite signed up for the injuries - broken spine, broken hand, smashed shoulder) but she's also got a hobby that's quite 'time consuming' - sewing/knitting/embroidery, and has more machines than I have bikes.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:50 am
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Okay, looks like I misunderstood the acronym.

CBA isn't Could Be Anal, correct?

This will affect the response


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:50 am
convert, bearGrease, matt_outandabout and 5 people reacted
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Posted : 28/03/2024 10:50 am
tall_martin, Simon, Simon and 1 people reacted
 SSS
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A cycling friend of mine a few years back got himself a girlfriend.
A few weeks later I met him again and asked how he was getting on regards the GF.
He said, and I quote 'She wanted me to play tennis with her, I knew at that point I had to bin her off'

Its good to have boundaries.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:51 am
funkmasterp, nuke, IdleJon and 5 people reacted
 mert
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😀

I got myself a girlfriend last year, she's keen to get out on the MTB i've put together for her as soon as the weather changes... So until then, we go hiking in the forest and geocaching with the kids...


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:58 am
fruitbat, kelvin, fruitbat and 1 people reacted
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Girlfriend vs MTB

Not seeing the problem tbh. You made the right choice 😁


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:07 am
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My girlfriend said it's me or the bikes. Gee, I'm gonna miss her


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:11 am
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Bikes are way better than girlfriends.  I turned up at home last night with a bike I'd borrowed from a mate and I plan to ride it all weekend.  My bike didn't care.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:17 am
Marko, J-R, cogglepin and 5 people reacted
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I suppose a girlfriend who is into MTB is worth its weight in gold.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:18 am
lucasshmucas, manderson, manderson and 1 people reacted
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Need photos of your now ex-girlfriend to understand whether you're an idiot or you're an idiot who likes bikes too much.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:27 am
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If she’s worth the effort,

Which she clearly isn't as he CBA....😁


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:31 am
richmars and richmars reacted
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My wife has muttered about being a bike widow on and off over the years.

She mostly accepts it= keeper


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:39 am
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If you explain you need some "me time" this weekend and give the reasons above with an alternative date to meet up, then if she's genuine, she'll understand.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:47 am
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She mostly accepts it= keeper

The acceptance came in our relationship when Mrs Binners put this framed print up in the dining room as there's invariably a bike in there. My road bike is leaning against the table at the moment 😀

Cycle-wall-art


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:48 am
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I mean, if she's not genuinely seeing you as a long term partner and was just after meaningless unfulfilling casual sex, she can drop me a DM....


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:54 am
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Decided a few years ago (actually nearly a decade!) that the single life is for me. After a series of bad experiences with controlling women and ones who didn't 'get' hobbies I gave it up as a lost cause. It doesn't help that I definitely don't want kids and when you're a 43 year old bloke the only women really left available are one who are either desperate to have kids NOW or have a ready-made brood in tow. The worst one told me on the third date that when we have kids (note there was no discussion about the subject before this...) that all hobbies must be forfeited to free up time for them. That's the only time I've bailed on a date midway, paid the bar bill and just left. The bar lady was shocked when I told her and let me go out the back door!

The only one that had any prospects of being a keeper was called Louise and changed her mind on having kids so let her go.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:54 am
funkmasterp, cogglepin, funkmasterp and 1 people reacted
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Mrs Zip drives out to a country pub to meet her friends for lunch and booze.
I then cycle down to drive her back.
Wins all round.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 11:55 am
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The girl I have been kinda seeing for the last couple of months was hinting to meet up.

So, I have kinda said I CBA this weekend.

We only met up on Tuesday night anyway.

Doesn't sound like it was really going anywhere anyway?


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 12:01 pm
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Partner that bikes also - worth it's weight in gold - yup, you'll need double the 'gold' to pay for the kit.

MrsF not a big cyclist, but has two bikes (my fault).

@zippykona, now that sounds a plan at lunchtimes.

MrsF is driving out for a meal into the country tonight, but on a potentially wet evening, with no work tomorrow, I think I'll have some beer, and get the TV to myself.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 12:11 pm
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Meanwhile in a place not that far away...

Girl 1 - " How's things going with that new bloke?"

Girl 2 (that the OP can't be arsed about) - " Great, I like him a lot,early days though"

Girl 3 - "What's on this weekend then?"

Girl 2 - " Not sure,he may be going cycling "

Girl 1 and 2 - "HE'S A CYCLIST!!,dump him NOW,they are all weirdos "

😆 🤣


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 12:16 pm
z1ppy and z1ppy reacted
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@reluctantjumper.
We had a girl in the shop buying presents for her bridesmaids. I casually asked when the wedding was ,she replied that he hadn't asked yet.
Scary lady.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 12:17 pm
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He’s now inconveniently besotted with her and can only bring himself to go riding if she’s more than 200 miles away

I'm currently besotted, but took a different approach... "You really want one of these ebikes... let's go and try one.." Hers arrives Saturday 😀


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:05 pm
ngnm, binners, ngnm and 1 people reacted
 irc
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Mrs IRC has let me go away on my own for a few tours ranging between 8 weeks and 11 weeks.  I was away for a week climbing in Skye a couple months after we met.  Every couple IMO needs things they do seperately as well as what they do together.  If a weekend is a problem it's a question mark.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:31 pm
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After 2 years of being single (it was great, away every weekend... lots of cycling etc) I've struck gold with my Girlfriend.

She's an MTB rider, got a gravel bike (same as mine, what are the chances), retired early and lives by Eryri in a mortgage free house. Also a climber and walker. Proper landed on my feet!


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:36 pm
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He said, and I quote ‘She wanted me to play tennis with her, I knew at that point I had to bin her off’

Quite right. Love means nothing to a tennis player


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:40 pm
ngnm, hightensionline, crossed and 53 people reacted
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got a gravel bike (same as mine, what are the chances)

I wasn't going to say owt @lowey, but after seeing your pictures on Friendface I was wondering if you'd actually bought his'n'hers matching bikes 😀


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:41 pm
lowey and lowey reacted
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Wife once ask me if I love my bike more than her.
I asked which one.
Seems that was an acceptable answer as she's still here.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:47 pm
 mert
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I suppose a girlfriend who is into MTB is worth its weight in gold.

I've managed 3 now. Well, one roadie, a professional rider no less (well, ok, she was unemployed and kept being flown all over the world to race. Such was the lot of a UK based professional woman cyclist in the 1990s.) Now in her 50's and only riding for fun.

One roadie/MTBer (who only used to ride to work before we dated). Ended up riding nationals on and off road more than once. She's now getting into a bit of enduro with her new partner, but only for shits and giggles.

And this one, who used to ride in her teens and early 20's but gave up due to funds/study/more study/child/small apartment/more study/work. So she'll start again soon.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:52 pm
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She’s an MTB rider, got a gravel bike (same as mine, what are the chances), retired early and lives by Eryri in a mortgage free house

Has she got a sister? Asking for a friend....


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:56 pm
J-R and J-R reacted
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I'd really love to know if there's a parallel thread to this over on the Women's forum section! 🤣


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 1:59 pm
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Shockingly there are occasions where it's not just the genders you've all assumed. My dating profile always had genuine bike photos on and a few of them to make it clear to whomever looking that I have other priorities and not even Brad Pitt himself will make me stop heading out on my bikes. Though I'm not always sure its the perfect solution for both to be into bikes, some blokes and their ego's can soon take a hit if you're better on a push bike than them but thankfully for my now husband he is much better on a motorbike than me so we each have our strengths. He spanners the motorbikes and I spanner the push bikes and he gets that a portion of my week is taken up with going out on my bike. Especially when I point out that if I don't I'll be significantly rounder with all the biscuits I eat!

Though as others have said it goes without saying that nobody whether male or female wants to be told they 'cba' with you. I'm sure any of us would appreciate the 'things have been so hectic and stressful so I could do with a weekend to myself' sentiment instead. Though having said that I'm the equal rare phenomenom that I say what I mean and dont just say 'I'm fine'.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 3:22 pm
ngnm, SYZYGY, slowol and 9 people reacted
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‘I’m fine’…

The two words that strike fear into any man’s heart 😂


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 3:32 pm
hightensionline, graham_e, funkmasterp and 9 people reacted
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‘I’m fine’…

The two words that strike fear into any man’s heart 😂

It's right up there with "oh I don't mind, you choose..."
which makes everything that happens from that moment on entirely your fault.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 3:35 pm
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Shockingly there are occasions where it’s not just the genders you’ve all assumed.

TBF, most of the examples here are personal anecdotes, and, most of us being male and the cyclist, the genders would tend to be that way round. Not necessarily anything to do with assumptions.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 3:40 pm
J-R and J-R reacted
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timbaFree Member
He said, and I quote ‘She wanted me to play tennis with her, I knew at that point I had to bin her off’
Quite right. Love means nothing to a tennis player

👏 criminal that this went unremarked.


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 9:41 pm
cerrado-tu-ruido, Poopscoop, fasthaggis and 9 people reacted
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Meh.  My other half's just glad to be rid of me....


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 9:53 pm
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It will be fine.  We didn't have plans, just discussed meeting up.  She had to rearrange a couple of times before and it was all cool.  However, you never know.  Could come home to my house egged if she is anything like my son's mum...


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:39 pm
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Her daughter told me (when she was 10) that her mum used to twist the bits on my bike when I was seeing her...  I think she means the barrel adjusters as I did have a brief period of unexplained gear shifting.  I had to get my mate to index it prior to most rides.  He would be like you must have been playing about with it...


 
Posted : 28/03/2024 10:43 pm
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