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OK. HERE GOES.
OUT OF THE LAST THREE TIMES I'VE HAD SEX WITH THE GIRLFRIEND I'VE ONLY 'PERFORMED' ONCE. THAT IS, I'VE FINISHED, SO TO SPEAK.
IT ISN'T THAT I CANT GET IT UP. IT ISN'T THAT I DON'T WANT SEX. I CAN HARDLY KEEP MY HANDS TO MYSELF WITH HER. I STILL FIND HER [u]VERY[/u] ATTRACTIVE.
MY PROBLEM IS THAT WHEN IT TURNS INTO A MARRATHON ROMP I GET OVER EXCITED. TOO MUCH FLASHES THROUGH MY HEAD AND I ALMOST LOSE TRACK OF WHAT I'M DOING, SO TO SPEAK. AND WHEN WE DO HAVE THESE MARATHON SESSIONS I END UP BEING ALMOST TOO HARD ON HER IN ORDER TO FINISH MYSELF OFF.
LAST NIGHT FOR INSTANCE; EVERYTHING GOING WELL, 'SATISFIED' HER SEVERAL TIMES OVER. REACHED THE POINT OF NO RETURN MORE THAN ONCE BUT SADLY I RETURNED, THAT IS I DIDN'T JUMP SHIP/DEPLOY.
HELP. PLEASE.
If you're hoping for a sensible response, you're about to be very disappointed.
SWITCH YOUR CAPS LOCK KEY TO 'OFF', and you might find things calm down a bit....
Too late, we saw it!
LOL, this should be good
Thread of the week, I predict.
Also,
[Tannoy]
[b]FATSIMON TO THE FORUM, PLEASE. I REPEAT, FATSIMON TO THE FORUM, PLEASE[/b]
[/Tannoy]
DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THERE RE. THE DISAPPEARING TEXT. EDITED IT AND COCKED UP SOMEWHERE.
BACK NOW THOUGH.
*Pulls up chair...*
Coffee?
tea?
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Pictures?
ITS BECAUE YOU'RE TOO BIG, OBVIOUSLY.
Try a size smaller...
WTF?
Cup of Rosy please, Teeto.
Got any biscuits?
biscuits!
not had any biscuits in ages!
alpin - Member
biscuits!
At least we know they won't be soggy ones.
Oh yes....
Work has been sooooo slow today...!
I think that you might regret this.
[img] http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_BKPQeFTrb40/R0oIFZNcbsI/AAAAAAAAAIY/qmazwwAW1x4/s200/Des%2BBrowne%2B-%2BSwiss%2BTony.jp g" target="_blank">
you're not taking antidepressants are you ? This is a common side effect...
radler, if you're having problems with release, try thinking of Brad Pitt at the important moment.
Beat me to it Ian, so to speak.
Red wine, anybody? St Emillion (sp?) ready 🙂
Define marathon?
There are so many beverages to choose from i have almost forgotten about the OP!
Over a minute.
Or is that just me?
Twirly for red wine, Hairy.
Woon't mind a little steak and kidney pie, if there's any about.
I've had the same problem,
3 solutions,
1, go till you'r knackered and accept the inevitable blue balls in the morning
2, get her to do more of the work (once im worn out it tends to be 'worse')
3, play buckaroo (call her her sisters/best friends name and see how long you can hold on)
That and console yourself that some people apparently have the opposite problem!
Ah, buckaroo, the sport of kings when a young boulevardier!
Define Marathon ... longer or shorter than 2 minutes?
This is going to be a long hard thread
Pulls up bed.......
Damn, I had so much work to do this afternoon.
[scrape]Pulls up chair[/scrape]
3, play buckaroo (call her her sisters/best friends name and see how long you can hold on)
Class, pure class.
Dirty Sanchez anyone?
Think of it as when you cross the line before her you win. And she's a big, useless loser.
Of course, you wouldn't want to be the loser, would you now?
Try the back door
You are expecting rather a lot from this "sex" thing, aren't you?
As I understand it, the purpose of the exercise is to satisfy mrsradler. This involves buying her something very expensive, probably giving her a massage and then lavishing as much attention on her as she needs to have fun. She will then say something about you being inconsiderate, and go to sleep. You dry-humping her long after she's finished and got bored in a bid to achieve ejaculation yourself will only irritate her, and make you feel silly.
Cuddle her for a bit, then when she dozes off go on the internet and look at something implausible involving women with no pubic hair, some dogs and a chinese gentleman while massaging assos chamois cream into your scrotum.
BD - Class!
BD, you speak from experience?
that or you are a very twisted man. lawyer, aren't you?
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I had this same problem with my ex, however she drank too much, smoked and generally became a bit of a minger, so i started thinking about riding during bedtime antics.
Now this is all well and good, the rare chance of me being able to multi task, think about riding whilst satisfying her is a talent is was very proud of......however, she became convinced i still fancied her and the demand grew.....
But seriously, you've found what makes her tick so to speak and you play on this, which is great for her and your ego, but it becomes an obsession to keep satisfying her again and again, you've stopped doing it for you and don't want to finish it for her...
Now there various things you can do to make you finish.
1, think of someone else, as wrong as it is the excitement will get help, she's been doing the same.
2, Don't be affraid not to be able to perform again after blowing ya load, have a cuppa/fag/bleed yer brakes then go at it again, that way you popped you sauce and the rest of the session is all for her, without your fear of not being able to finish.
3, Use non contact foreplay, you can touch anywhere but the those special places...do this for as long as you can handle then let go, the build up will be beyond control..
4, You maybe in denial and really want a man, try it!
We used to have a user on here to help out with these things, But Agony aunt is all loved up and doesn't come on here no more..
I am both a lawyer and a very twisted man. However, I am also a walking psycho-sexual catastrophe of Woody Allen-like proportions. 🙂
You’re obviously GAY!
BigDummy - MemberI am both a lawyer and a very twisted man. However, I am also a walking psycho-sexual catastrophe of Woody Allen-like proportions.
Night riding takes on a whole new perspective with you BD 😆 PMSL!
Whereas Im just a twisted-man and hopefully a layer 8)
Also
[Tannoy} [b]Houns to the Forum, I repeat Houns to the Forum[/b][/Tannoy]
😀
Biscuit and some Redbush Tea please
finger up ya bum?