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I think an awful lot of behaviour and attitudes with respect to monogamy is totally outdated and makes no sense. Obviously having someone you're together with and can raise kids with is a good idea, but then having no-one else ever just to prove you'll be there for that person is a bit hmmm.
I've always wondered what purpose a relationship (in the *normal* sense) serves with this view? Why not have *friends* and pay for a housekeeper/ nanny? Most of the cheaterists here seem to be paying for sex but I bet they'd baulk at the idea of paying a cleaner in between their life as a roaming stud muffin 😆 When did forming friendships with members of both genders without the end goal of sex become unfashionable 🙂 Seems a lot like cherry picking parts of monogamy and polyxxx to suits one's own selfishness and insecurities but hey ho.
My Ex cheated on me with one of her mates, a female mate.......
I didn't know whether to feel relieved that she had not gone with another bloke or feel that I must be so bad I'd put her off men for life 🙄 😀
Turns out it was just a phase she was going through and she is now single.
A chum had an affair over a few years - well, a woman he slept with irregularly - for no good reason other than she was available. He told no-one except his best mate, who dobbed him in out of jealousy following a failed attempt to take the wife away for a dirty weekend. (The best mate wasn't getting any at all, while chum was running two women, was the thinking)
Chum realised that his marriage was worth saving, dumped mistress, never spoke to best mate again. Chum says he feels guilty about wasting the other woman's time because of her age, but reckons that shagging someone unsuitable for him as a life-partner, saved him from a later affair with a woman who might have split his marriage and family. FWIW, chum is still with his wife, ex-best mate still single at 55+. No idea about his girlfriend.