Our boy's basically a good kid and, despite being 8, usually does what he's told.
So, this morning he shouts upstairs (we're still in bed) to ask if he can go on the computer. We said yes. 😯
Five minutes later, he's upstairs crying, saying he knows he's done wrong etc. His face is that of a kid who knows he's got it coming.
Turns out, he's been Googling inappropriately... according to the search history, he's tried out 'sexy', 'nacked women' and a whole lot more.
Worst of all, he's grabbed some gloves and started waggling them on his chest like nipple tassles. 😯
So, how out of order is this? We've already given him the stern glare, but how else should we respond?
1. Huge, self-righteous anger - the blow up he'll never forget?
2. Carefully worded telling off, ending with the we-forgive-you hug
3. Be like a hippy and embrace his curiosity
Sorry I can't be of any help but:
Worst of all, he's grabbed some gloves and started waggling them on his chest like nipple tassles.
😆
Coffee/keyboard interface...!
I'd be more worried about his spelling of naked...
Rachel
Nipple tassles 😯 **** me!
I'm going for 1. I don't have kids, but what they are able access on the web is terrifying!
Can't you put some form of parental control on the computer?
What's the inappropriate bit? It's what the internet was invented for. Safer than finding it in hedges.
2 and 3 I seem to recall looking at the undies section of catalogues when I was younger - not sure what age I started at
TBH I am more worried by the crying and confessing tbh as that does not seem the normal behaviour of a child - looks at own children knows this to be true
PS my eledest loves space and he once googled Biggest Black Hole - Google safe search is now employed
I'd be more worried about his spelling of naked...
And he's in the top group for spelling too!
Can't you put some form of parental control on the computer?
Yeah, we never needed them before. We've told him only to look at certain sites etc, but have clearly been too trusting.
I am more worried by the crying and confessing tbh as that does not seem the normal behaviour of a child
That's the thing - he's the kid who tells on others if they've been naughty... which isn't cool and has obviously lulled us into a false sense of security.
But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'. 😯
Now that I've stopped laughing...
How about asking what it was he was intrigued by* and going from there.
*Obviously he was looking for sexy, knackered women. I have one going spare.
Worst of all, he's grabbed some gloves and started waggling them on his chest like nipple tassles.
take him to a burlesque show...
You have got to love STW and the randomness of life 😆
Personally I'd go the carefully-worded telling off, followed by a denial of internet access for say, a week. That will give a) him time to think about what's happened and the possible consequences, and b) you time to start putting parental/access controls into place on your browsers.
Boys will be boys, we've all been there (well, if you're a bloke anyway...and possibly if you're a laydee too...). Have a giggle about it to yourself and let it slide.
If it becomes a habit and he's being furtive about it or deliberately trying to get access (perhaps on a friend's PC) then you need to look at more concerted action.
Option 3.
No point in attaching a load of shame and guilt to sex. Unless you are Catholic? 😉
followed by a denial of internet access for say, a week.
I wouldn't bother - he knows he's done something wrong, why make him miserable?
As for boys being boys - he's pre-pubescent, so boobies and whatnot are probably pretty meaningless. I expect he's just curious about these things he has heard about.
To be honest I'd be asking more questions of yourselves as parents an why you hadn't thought of putting some security on your Internet before now* (said in non sanctimonious way)
* my daughter is also 8 and I have nothing set up. Probably should change that as she's bound to get curious about the birds and the bees soon, and kids being kids, she'll use google before asking questions.
Try not to make too much of a big deal out of it.You've told him off & he knows he has done wrong,let it go at that.
Perhaps best not to let him on the pc unsupervised for a few years,8 is a bit young.
Although the glove/nipple tassles thing is hilarious & a great story for when he's older.... 😀
he once googled Biggest Black Hole
PMSFL!!! 😆
But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'.
You sir, have a sex pest on your hands.
<High five>
at the end of the day you can't stop them seeing stuff , as junkyard said even an innocent search can bring unexpected results , as I found when I googled " outdoor action " whilst looking for a camping store in Bolton.
I remember being quite shocked at some of the stuff my son looked at when he was 13/ 14 especially the " feed em up fatty sites , which seem to advocate a very unhealthy diet in young ladies. Best thing you can do is keep em grounded and try to react in a level headed way.
To be honest I'd be asking more questions of yourselves as parents an why you hadn't thought of putting some security on your Internet before now*
and...
Perhaps best not to let him on the pc unsupervised for a few years,8 is a bit young.
Hand. Slapped. Ouch.
You're right of course.
BTW, It was a really good nipple-tassle dance. Even in my self-righteous anger I'll admit the boy's got rhythm. 😀
This is the thread that keeps on giving. 😆
But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'.
Quote of the week already! 😆
Go all misty eyed, and start reminiscing. Tell him he doesn't know how lucky he is, back when you were a lad, there was no such thing as Google, and you had to find such things in magazines randomly found in hedges
Maybe send him out on a sort of Treasure Hunt. See if he can come back with a soggy copy of Razzle
Please don't take option 1. If my early exposure to all things sex/gender had been handled more supportively, then I might not have been quite so screwed up in the head in my 20s.
Ask questions, give honest answers and respect whatever he has to say.
Rachel
magazines randomly found in hedges
I grew up in Mid Wales. Hedges everywhere. Never came on a magazine though, and believe me I tried. 😉
😆 Ace thread!
"Never [b]came[/b] on a magazine" 😆
No point in attaching a load of shame and guilt to sex.
+1
He's done no harm and he'll see far worse via friends at school etc over the next few years.
Truck stops were the best places to look.
Erm.... apparently. Ahem....
Never came on a magazine though, and believe me I tried.
*Nasty*
Poor aim? Not enough pressure in the tanks?
Ask questions, give honest answers and respect whatever he has to say.
See, that's a toughie... because that's the conversation I've been dreading for ages.
Son (let's call him camo8) came home a few nights ago and told me that babies were made when a girl kissed a man on the ****. So his 8-year-old female friend told him.
Can I blame Google for this?
he once googled Biggest Black Hole
I've just tried that and the results are very disappointing [off to check if I have safe search on...]
*Nasty*
Intention good. Aim bad. 🙁
Well in situations like this I ALWAYS BLAME THE PARENTS!
Leave the boy alone and have a word with yourselves. Better parenting skills are the answer.
We had a porn bin at a bus-stop when I was a kid. We inherited from the older brother of one of the lads. I passed it on to my brother. It provided a dozen specialist periodicals every week for at least a decade.
A septegenarian member of the Orkney Traditional Dance Group Googled 'balled yarn' as she'd run out on a jumper she was knitting. Her eyes were well and truly opened 😯
EDIT Just googled it to check myself, it wasn't so bad. Perhaps it may have been a spell checked derivative thereof.
Leave the boy alone and have a word with yourselves. Better parenting skills are the answer.
* Sigh *
Visions of getting centre-spread in Good Parenting magazine fade into disillusioned ruins.
I think you need to embrace his curiosity and celebrate with some pagan mime, if that fails thrash the little pervert
He's a curious child, and it sounds like what he found got too serious, probably its the result of playground talk. But the nipple tassles is not that worrying, we had a prudish teacher when I was that age who got border line hysterical because we put footballs up our jumpers and pretended to have boobs. He's mimicking what he saw, probably in an attempt to understand it.
Mixture of 2 and 3. 1 would risk him hiding stuff from you.
Yes i just re did it as well and I wonder if google have done something with the search term- was perhaps 6-12 months ago he did it
I think he said video as well - he watched the videos on the hubble site but that is equally "disappointing"
Intention good. Aim bad.
Surely this is where 'the crescent' comes in handy*
[img] 
[/img]
*pun fully intended 😆
Agree with Rachel. Can you avoid attaching guilt and shame to sex? Parental controls on the Internet and a manly chat would be my approach. Save he nipple tassel dance story for a wedding speech.
Visions of getting centre-spread in Good Parenting magazine fade into disillusioned ruins.
PLEASE MAKE IT STOP! 😆
Wait until he gets back to school after the holidays and tells all his mates about it.
They'll all be googling inappropriate stuff when they get home.
"But littlecamo16's Dad lets him do it!"
you could treat this like parents who deal with their kids smoking by forcing them to inhale a whole packet of the most disgusting cigarettes in one go....
just introduce him to hora.
If it was me- a programme or some serious internet security with his use supervised.
More importantly I'd want to find out where/how he arrived at this search activity. Where the seeds of thought started. Do you let him watch TV after 9 etc? Does he have his own tv? Peer pressure? etc etc.
When I was a kid the trail left was the littlewoods cataloge flopping open at the ligerie section.
Whats the difference (appart from the nipple tassles 😀 )
