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[i]Your not an mtb rider simon your cyclist and to top it all off! your giving out advice like your the second coming of moses. [/i]
WTF?! In that case, I'm a CYCLIST too. I ride MTB, CX, road, track. Sometimes I ride really nice top end kit. Sometimes I ride my 7yr old Cove with it's old (but still perfectly functional) suspension forks. Kit doesn't matter. Being out there enjoying it does matter.
And I'm willing to bet that simonfbarnes has done more to promote MTBing and get new riders into the sport than the majority of people on here...
It's got to be some kind of elaborate trollish experience...
Anyway, back to your gorgeous eyes, are they really that shade of blue?
[i]are they really that shade of blue? [/i]
The sort of blue that nearly, but not quite, matches the bloody awful wallpaper? 😉
what in the name of almighty arse is going on?
Everybody in the world is, deep down, quite reasonable. And then they get on the internet, log on to STW, hit the invisible 'Gobshite' key next to 'Caps Lock' and then type angrily away during daylight hours. Then the sun goes down, beers are drunk and everyone calms down a bit.
Repeat until fade.
He's gone from furious, badly spelled invective to slightly better spelled dope inspired knackers, and I'm still confused. Make the bad man stop, please.
This is priceless.
I'm confused too mitch. Is this kaesae chap the one who likes to take slappers into the woods and get them to stand in stress positions while he photographs them or have I lost the plot along the way.
can you imagine an elite mountain bike event on anything other than performance bikes. perhaps downhilling on hovis's.
yes, but's that's my point. I feel 'elite' anything just serves to put off ordinary folk as they feel so outclassed, it 's not worth them bothering. I consider the whole of competitive sport to be a childish waste of time. The biking I do is cooperative, where we're all on the same team, regardles sof ability, having fun.
The better the bike the better the performance the better the experience.
only within the ability and power of the rider.
your giving out advice like your the second coming of moses.
I rarely give advice about biking as I'm clueless about it really. I just like to ride. I do know a lot about routes though and other stuff.
The one question that is bothering me is what sort of qualifications does this guy have to base his claims on? Okay being cytec qualified isn't the be all and end all of cycle maintenance, but what exactly makes kaesae any more qualified than me? Not having a go, just asking!
Also how exactly does one realign the rear end of a bike?
Also how exactly does one realign the rear end of a bike?
use your dowsing rod to find the ley line
This becoming proper surreal, SFB as Moses, leading the tribe of STWites through the cheeky trails of the deserts of Calderdale...
Why's he gone quiet? Is he skinning up?
No mitch he's got another slapper to dispose of in the woods.
I like him. Shame he's a skinny ginger cross eyed muppet
.
But those eyes...
"All you sheep that are eating out of this monkeys hands and following him around, aint bikers your peacock posers. You think you have the right to criticize me. I spend all my time getting riders out riding. What are you doing to help the MTB culture in this country other than making out like your intelligent enough to have an opinion and needing to wipe your faces with toilet roll. Sh1t heads"
I must admit, I prefer his earlier work...
Just got this e-mail from a stuart laird via facebook - "Barnsleymitch, you fat stupid ****" - well done!
"Barnsleymitch, you fat stupid ****"
Yay! Stalkparty!!
Mitch, I wish you could see the whole SFB insult. That sh1t was poetry man. Mods sh1tcanned it (probably with reason TBF).
There is a deep, almost vital expression of angst, yet an animal like passion, one that cannot be restrained.
Better than Tracey Emin anyway..
Can we get this guy to do a thread every week - it's brilliant.
Every so often he says something I agree with - but then so does SFB, who is probably feeling miffed that someone is more argumentative than him - but I'm sure he'll disagree with that.
By the way I'm with SFB on bikes - more expensive are often faster, or able to smooth out sillier terrain (both within the rider's abilities) - but more fun? That is for any given rider on a given day to decide. And I've riden the £2-3k bikes and my most recent bike cost me £250 all in (not just the frame) and i reckon they're all good (some are just cheaper).
Sorry I was serious for a minute there - can someone get back with a pot of virtiolic toilet filler.
You use one of these to align the frame.
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these to align the dropouts
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and this to align the derailleur hanger
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what exactly makes kaesae any more qualified than me?
Maybe the knowledge and ability to use the above?
This has been amusing
I wish you could see the whole SFB insult.
I saved it on my work pooter. I guessed it might be pulled.
And he's from London, not Edinburgh. By the way Stuart, I may be a fat ****, but I'm certainly not stupid.
lol only been on STW forum for a few weeks but if you guys do this kind of 'reality forum' or 'ebay baiting' stuff regularly, I not gonna have a normal life anymore. im just gonna be on here. lol who dragged this kursae chap on to here... hes awesome... this is literally art... i mean i feel its slightly wrong... but it is funny... yes... it definitely is funny.... hmmm but slightly wrong at the same time... thinking about it i am starting to slighlty feel like simon cowell...
Sam - sorry to be a pedant, and I've never aligned a frame, but two of those tools look like they are for checking alignment, not actually doing the alignment - not sure about the third. Would I be right?
Dogmatix - not that often but it's great when it happens.
Anyone think that Team McRoy might be interested ina frame supplier / sponsor. It could get this guy's frames out in front of a big audience, maybe even some TV coverage
Never ever joined a thread so late and read it all. Like the advert - priceless.
Sam, Igm, sorry to have to point out the bl**ding obvious, but he's stalking me on facebook, sending me abusive e-mails, and for all I know he wants to finger my steaming entrails! Who gives a fiddler's **** about frame alignment? There's a time and a place lads. HELP!
nee-nar-nee-nar-nee-nar
Just looked back and I don't think this is the guy who tortures slappers in the woods. But right back near the start of all this I'm sure such a person was involved. I haven't been this confused since the backwards talking midget turned up in Twin Peaks.
The first one is for checking, you need to check it to be able to align it though - kinda hard otherwise... The other two also actually perform the bending. Sorry for your troubles Mitch, I was just trying to add something constructive and perhaps some explanation as to what Kael actually does with his frame restoration. His marketing approach may need some work though.
Oh cheers avdave2, you've infuriated the big mentaller by suggesting he's some sort of slapper tyer upper, and now it's me he wants to moider. NURSE - he's out of bed again!
Cheers Sam. I'm more than familiar with my hanger straightener, never seen your first or second tools mind.
Sam a noble effort but I get the feeling that were past the constructive stage. However there is the position of President of Europe available and your ability not to get dragged in to this stupidity and still offer useful and informative input means you'll get my vote. Well you would get my vote if it were a democratic decision.
Mitch which of those tools do you think he'll use first on your testicles?
If this loon made lights this could be the biggest thread ever, but unfortunately
Simonfbarns you have a face like a shaved gerbils half way through a after 6 months of constipation
I can't believe I missed this earlier - total classic :o) Well done!
"Mitch which of those tools do you think he'll use first on your testicles?"
It'll be a hammer - it always is. SFB: you can write my obituary, you gentle, lovely man, and I want ernie, juan and hora to help carry the coffin. Tell ton I'm sorry.
Not my eyes - not my beautiful, beautiful eyes!
If Ton was at the back your coffin would look like a drag car.
I have no ****ing idea what's going on here, but I'm pretty certain it's beddytime for a lot of you guys - your keyboards have done enough.
it's early yet!
Holding out for post pub entertainment!
But some of us have to work in the morning and don't want to miss a beat!
What a classic thread! Though I really don't get his split personality. Encore!
So is kaesae/kael/airborne stuart laird, or was that just a completely random abusive e-mail? And if he is, is he an existing STW'er and does anybody know him?
If Kaesae isn't back on tonight it's probably because he's driving, very uncomfortably, to commit murder at barnsleymitch's house.
barnsleymitch is only a username! I don't actually live in Barnsley, I live in Exeter! That's a lie as well, I am in fact SimonFBarnes, yes that's me, Simon - kill me, not barnsleymitch!