OFFICIAL Swinley (SEXYPARTY) all-welcoming First-day-of-spring FUN RIDE! – Page 4 – Bike Forum

philconsequence · 2011-02-14T14:42:06Z

[b]THE Swinley super-sexual super-fun all-welcoming March FUN RIDE![/b] OK, here we go again :) In the same way staff on planes ask you to pay attention as the safety announcement may have changed since your last flight, there are some changes and additional information in this post! I have broken it up into sections to try and answer as many questions in advance as possible: [b][u]WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?[/u][/b] Who wants to join us for a chilled not so serious not too fast ride? A ride that is completely devoid of mad skilz, big air and judgement, an afternoon of getting muddy in Swinley... Equally who wants to meet up with some of the weirdos from this forum and blast through the single track like a scolded yeti? The last SwingleySexyParty ended up with some confusion at the beginning and we ended up with everyone heading out in one BIG group of just over 45 riders.. this time I think it's sensible to have a couple of groups: [b]1 - "The A-Team"[/b], a group of riders so fast and AWESOME that it would be mean and nasty to make them wait for the slower riders... PaulD has kindly volunteered to lead this group. [b]2 - "The A(part2) Team"[/b], as above, but possibly necessary if enough people come along to have 2 faster groups... Thisisnotaspoon has kindly volunteered to lead this group. [b]3 - "The It's not how fast you ride its how much fun you're having (but secretly jealous of the extra confident healthy people) Team"[/b].... Cinnamon_Girl will be leading this group, feel free to stick photos of LOLcats on her backpack when she's not looking. Conversation and pace should be set by the slowest person in the "INHFYRIHMFYH(BSJOFECHP)" group so please dont worry about not keeping up with the mentalists, this should be an afternoon with lots of little stops and no pressure to be amazing. If it wasn't for a crack down on misogymathingy I'd almost jest it makes it a perfect ride to invite your lady friends along too ;) If that sounds like your idea of fun, then it would be a pleasure to have you along. [b][u]WHERE AND WHEN?[/b][/u] The plan is to meet at [u]11:30 on Sunday 20th March[/u] in the LookOut carpark for fettling, pumping up tyres, admiring my pyjamas/Yeti's pre-ride stretches and then setting off to ride at 12o-clock lunchtime. It is worth emphasising that it is sensible to allow plenty of time to park and, if needs be, use the Coral Reef car park which is across the road from the entrance to the LookOut. There is an Overflow car park that is accessed from far right hand side of car park on the road that exits the car park... It is alongside the B3430 Nine Mile Ride. A webpage with the look out address details (on the right of the map), map and directions is available [urlOnce you've parked up, unloaded your dandyweapon of choice and checked your "tyre choice for Swinley?" thread then come join me underneath the trees to the right just as you go though the Go-Ape gates. [b][u]ARE THERE ANY RULES?[/b][/u] Rules? Wouldn't that ruin the spirit of such a friendly chilled ride? Well yes it would if it was all taken too seriously, however there are some pointers that are worth getting out of the way now, fingers crossed they don't come across as super-strict rules.. more pieces of advice to make your ride and everyone else's that little bit more enjoyable. [b]1)[/b] Bring your own spares, [b]2)[/b] Bring your own camelback/water, [b]3)[/b] Wear a helmet if you've got one or do your own risk assessment and dont, [b]4)[/b] Bring your own mid-ride snacks, dont want any "bonking" now do we ;) [b]5)[/b] Route will be decided upon the day by the "leaders" of each group and will be dependent on any trail closures/conditions... [b]6)[/b] If LOTS of people turn up then we might need to break up into more than 2 groups, best to decide this on the day. [b]7)[/b] As with the last sexyparty...In the spirit of a beginners/gentle/nothing-too-serious-ride I will be wearing full on downhill pyjamas, I will ride a carrera from Halfords and I will make sure any bike snobs out there will be mortally offended by my blatant disregard for the unwritten rules of MTB... so if anyone is worrying about what they ride or their choice of lycra, relax as you wont be judged! [b]8 )[/b] We ride at the pace of the slowest rider in each group, or we ride at our own pace and wait at the top of the next hill/section/junction for others to catch up. [b]9)[/b] No pressure on anyone to do things they are not happy with as it's all about having fun! Walking certain sections/hills will not be frowned upon. [b]10)[/b] Due to potentially large numbers of riders, please don't bring your dogs as chances are mrsconsequence will ride into them whilst distracted by their awesomeness... She is still learning the hard way that you ride into what you're looking at. [u]Drink/nicotine/crack-pipes disclaimer:[/u] I dont really feel the need to tell people to be considerate, so I'll just say that people are people and will do what they want, but in the spirit of...

ononeorange

Posts: 2

Full Member

Ace - cheers, Will try to get along then!

Posted : 17/02/2011 10:10 am

Anonymous

Posts: 0

cheers phil
theres 3 of us so far, potentially another few but i will update you nearer the time to give you an idea of numbers...
we're all "laid back" riders of mixed ability, some unfit and some overweight & unfit 😉

Posted : 17/02/2011 10:56 am

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

we're all "laid back" riders of mixed ability, some unfit and some overweight & unfit

sounds perfect!

Posted : 17/02/2011 2:02 pm

DezB

Posts: 54367

Free Member

[i]can you all send blow-up dolls created in your image[/i]

Only if you promise not to abuse them

Posted : 17/02/2011 2:04 pm

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

i'll be on my best behaviour, but i can't make any promises for mrsconsequence.

Posted : 17/02/2011 4:33 pm

singletrackmind

Posts: 7279

Full Member

I'm still coming! ! !

I was only saying RRRRRRRRuuuuuuuuuuuuubbbbbbbiiii
ssssssssshhhhhhhhhh as Dezb is no longer able to make it .

We are like twins and abit of a double act but hey ho , life goes on .

Posted : 17/02/2011 9:34 pm

cinnamon_girl

Posts: 17843

Hey Rob - good news. 8)

Posted : 17/02/2011 9:48 pm

DrP

Posts: 12116

Free Member

Hmmm, gutted I missed the last one, so really want to make this one...however...off on holiday the next day, and perhaps the missus may not like having to pack all by her lonesone (with the baby..).

Leave it with me - I'll try to convince her it's for the best...

DrP

Posted : 17/02/2011 9:49 pm

cinnamon_girl

Posts: 17843

C'mon DrP - you know you want to! We all want to check out your skillz. 😉

Posted : 17/02/2011 9:53 pm

neilneilorangepeel

Posts: 0

Free Member

I'd like to join you guys if I may? Seeing as I'm reasonably new to the forum and a local to the area it would be good to get to meet you all in person.

*runs off to donate* 🙂

Posted : 17/02/2011 9:55 pm

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

why do people keep asking permission?!

😀

the more the merrier i say! it'd be great to have you along

Posted : 17/02/2011 10:50 pm

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

had a dream about this last night.... PaulD, promise me you wont turn up dressed as a Black Knight and decide to chase the slower group around!

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:52 am

neilneilorangepeel

Posts: 0

Free Member

😀

Just common courtesy I guess.

Posted : 18/02/2011 9:39 am

DezB

Posts: 54367

Free Member

Sod courtesy for that bunch of idiots.

Posted : 18/02/2011 9:50 am

DezB

Posts: 54367

Free Member

Oops forgot: 😉

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:17 am

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

bugsy being at the back...checkin out the blokes 😆

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:46 am

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

haha so you're the sweeper for the slow group? i'm afraid you might be stuck staring at mrsconsequence in that case 😆

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:49 am

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

i don't do slow groups...i do the sociable group! i'll let all you anti social race whippets go off and do your thang whilst i have fun 😆

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:51 am

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

i like you already.

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:53 am

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

fanks! any friend of CG is a friend of mine!

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:56 am

DezB

Posts: 54367

Free Member

I haven't seen Aleigh for yonks 🙁

Posted : 18/02/2011 12:55 pm

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

Awwww.....we will have to organise a reunion ride I reckon!

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:37 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

bugsy being at the back...checkin out the blokes

Bagsy riding behind Aleigh, so's I can check out her bottom.

What? It's [i]equality[/i], love... 😉

I'll be smoking whenever and wherever I like. Anyone who don't like it, tough. You'se mostly drive cars don't you? So shut up then!

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:47 pm

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

Are you having an argument by yourself bud?!!

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:50 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

😀

I'm still going to look at your bottom though.

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:52 pm

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

Well you won't be able to if I'm at the back!

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:54 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

I'll use a complex and sophisticated system of mirrors then...

Posted : 18/02/2011 6:55 pm

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

Now that I would like to see!

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:03 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

No, you won't be able to see it.

I will be able to see your bottom though....

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:04 pm

PeterPoddy

Posts: 19914

Free Member

So, if I was to come along, would it be necessary to bring, say, some cake?

I could, if necessary, lead a group as well. If anybody fancies it I could do a longer ride to somewhere a bit different? But we'd have to get on with it fairly sharpish.....

Anyone up for a mystery tour?
🙂

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:27 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

I am, as long as I can look at Aleigh's bottom. 🙂

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:30 pm

nacho

Posts: 0

Free Member

I'm in. Got my licence to roam form Mrs Nacho. C u all there

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:39 pm

tazzymtb

Posts: 10199

Full Member

fink I'll leave you lot to it. You're all Freaks 😯

Posted : 18/02/2011 7:41 pm

aleigh

Posts: 0

Free Member

Miss it miss out!

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:09 pm

SilentSparky

Posts: 0

Free Member

Think I'll come along too, keep meaning to join one of the forum rides.

Its actually my birthday on the 20th also, no need to bring me presents/cards though 8)

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:15 pm

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

mystery tour sounds like a cool option... people wanting to subscribe to the Peter Poddy MAgical Mystery Sex Tour should make themselves known 🙂

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:42 pm

CaptainFlashheart

Posts: 50252

Free Member

I'll be in the Alps. 8)

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:46 pm

Bigface0_0

Posts: 0

Free Member

Peter Poddy MAgical Mystery Sex Tour

this does sound like a funny option but Im worry my mankini may get muddy and you dont want it to start rubbing!!!!

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:48 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

I'll be in the Alps.

You'd never come anyway. Have you ever been on a STW ride? Ever?

It's ok; we know you're not really a posh bloke. You really don't have to keep pretending...

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:50 pm

CaptainFlashheart

Posts: 50252

Free Member

😆

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:50 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

No it's not funny. If I had a pound for every time you've made an excuse not to come riding, I'd have enough money for an alpine ski-ing trip...

You do realise some of us do actually know who you are, don't you? I know somone who used to work with you... 😉

Did you see it kicking off in Trafalgar Square earlier? 😯

[url= http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12501482 ]

Knives, hockey sticks and other weapons were used on Thursday as tourists and commuters looked on, police said.

A man aged 19 was stabbed in the head, arm and back but he has since been discharged from hospital.

A 17-year-old stabbed in the chest is in a stable condition, as is a 19-year-old wounded in the neck, back and leg.

[/url]

Posted : 18/02/2011 8:56 pm

scud

Posts: 4108

Free Member

Count me in I'm up for it, make a change to our less than sexy BOB tops!

Posted : 18/02/2011 9:08 pm

PeterPoddy

Posts: 19914

Free Member

Actually I can't come. Oops. Seems I might be at the same orgy as WCA! 🙂

I knew I was out the night before but it's just clicked as to what I'm actually doing and where I'll be. (drunk and a long way away, basically) and I very much doubt I'll get back in time in a fit state to ride a bicycle.

Apologies for my stupidity 😳

Posted : 18/02/2011 9:14 pm

darkmattah

Posts: 0

Free Member

Awwww...I immediately thought "I'm in" and then realised I'll be on a plane to Morzine for a bit of snow shenanigans.

If anyone wants bunga bunga (or weekend mountain biking) in the mean time I'll completely up for that though.

Posted : 18/02/2011 10:14 pm

philconsequence

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

looking forward to this, PP tis a shame... we'll sacrifice a virgin in your honour 8)

darkmattah, morzine is a suitably sexy alternative.. i salute you

scud, be great to have you along!

Posted : 19/02/2011 11:56 am

Forum menu

[Closed] OFFICIAL Swinley (SEXYPARTY) all-welcoming First-day-of-spring FUN RIDE!