I woosed out of a nights camping at the one in Alston that isn't listed anywhere. If you're interested its the one behind the petrol station and railway station next to the river.

To get to the site you go through a Scrapyard and then there is a small patch of grass for tents. This is seperated from the playing fields and the doggers car park by a very small wall. The toilet / shower block is the freakiest place I've ever been. Its beasically in a derelict building that was outfitted in the 60s and hasn't been touched since. I should've taken photo's but was paranoid (scared) about getting mugged / attacked etc.

I was on my own and no-one else at the campsite so ran off to the Youth Hostel.

Worst for midges: Keld.
Probably a lovely campsite but I couldn't get out of the tent.

The warden at afan campsite once checked that a group of my mates weren't gay. He was proper serious too.

Nice enough campsite for straight people though.

The warden at afan campsite once checked that a group of my mates weren't gay

how did he perform the check..?

Julian, from now on I will watch my back if I only ever camp around those quarters.

Great Langdale on a bank holiday. Was like a refugee camp for northern teenagers.

On a hill outside Woolacombe. Called Crossroads campsite? Bank holiday weekend, massively overfilled, fresh water failed, bogs blocked, owner did a runner reputedly, campers rioted (well, in a hippyish pretend surfer kind of way).

Was on a municipal site in St Malo after a bike tour when was woken at 2am by French chavs ripping down fences to put on their massive bonfire. Feared for life so moved tent.

tuatapere NZ

we arrived – no one else on site , we couldnt find any other sites – no where was open to ask , liek a ghost town.

we were on bikes and we were running late at night due to chronic headwinds.

pitched the tent , made the tea in the dark

got up the in morning went to the buckie to pay and there was an obituary on the wall , the owner had died and his relitives just left the place as was going to ruin – no one else stayed that night,

2 days later we read in the otago daily times that someone had been held at knife point while his wife was raped in their motorhome in the self same campsite the night after we stayed – scared the shit out of me thats for sure

The cauldron at hayling island, it's a hellhole 😯

oh hell, the 'i hope you lot aren't gay' wadrden was at glyncorrwg campsite not afan. 😳 Sorry afan campsite people if you're looking.

A campsite on the left, about a mile after Coed-y-Brenin.

Lots of signs, and a manic ex-copper as an owner – and facilities in assorted buildings/lean-to's, but like a toilet and sink in one, and then a shower in another and then a washing-up sink elsewhere etc.

Plus the ground was a marsh…

The worst campsite we've stayed at has to be at Malham Cove. Sadly it has to be in one of the most beautiful locations. Hopefully the old git and his son who currently run it will soon pass on to pastures new and it can be run properly.

Pieface – are you talking about Alston in Cumbria? Surely not a very likely place to get mugged/attacked?

b r…that's our second on the list! The owner's wife was an absolute cow and insisted on being paid in cash after her husband had accepted a cheque! Has put me off Wales tbh!! 8)

Trail_rat's winning, that's not good.

That one at Alston doesn't even sound like a campsite – more just a patch of unused ground!

Black Rock Sands nr Porthmadog. Great location full of pi**se-up tw*ts.

Closely followed by Coniston Hall, August Bank Holiday it descended into a Stella-fuelled hell hole.. Again great location.

Yep, Coniston on the list as well. Left MrfC and kids there one night at 2.00am and drove home. Just full of pissed up, loud scousers and geordies.

The Alston campsite is, IIRC, a small static caravan site that does its best to help out hikers on the Pennine Way as it is (was) the only site for a long stretch.

coniston hall is shat full stop but thats just due to the clientelle rather than the site itself.
we had 4 blokes snapping branches from the woods behind us at 2am to take back to their camp fire. when i walked past their camp in the morning on my way to the abloutions the branch was still there next to the fire, unburnt. feckers.

+1 for the Coed-y-Brenin + the field was full of sheep shit.

Some years ago BC (before children) we used to go touring with the bikes in northern France , We always got in touch with the relevant areas tourist info to get details of the area like campsites and whats on.

After 5 days of a 2 week holiday we pulled in to a place called Kernon to find the grass at about chest height across the entire site , the water pipes apart from 1 cut of at 2' from the ground . The place was completely deserted and looked like it had been that way for a good while.

As it was 5pm and we'd already covered about 35 miles that day we had no choice but to stay , grass was trampled down so we could pitch and we found the stop tap for the only working tap. Dinner was cooked and we went to bed. Sometime around 3am we awoke to a snuffly grunty noise that I can only assume was a wild boar also a few gentler grazing noises (deer?).

Come the morning we awoke the the high pitched buzz of midges/mozzies and opened the tent to a cloud of them that would shame anywhere in Scotland. Mrs carlos grabbed the tent contents and ran into the hut that was on site whilst I pulled all the tent pegs and took the tent inside too. In the 5 minutes it took to do this I must've been bitten 4-500 times (ouchy)

After packing we rode 10 miles to the nearest town to find a chemist , the bloke behind the counter thought I had measles , when I told him it was insect bites he grabbed a tube of lotion of the shelf and plastered it all over my arms , face and neck (by this time I'd developed an involuntary twitch) and only charged me for the next tube.

We named the place camp crusty after the Simpsons episode , so never trust supposedly up to date information.

Honest bods that we are we even left Francs at the tariff listed on the hut , probably spent on Gitanes by the local kids.

Camping at Santa Pod in a muddy field full of chav's wasn't the greatest. Listening to Scooter once was bad enough, never mind for a full night.

Middle of France in may this year. Driving all day it was 8 pm and the only place open was a municipal travelers site. Oh how we laughed/ didn't sleep a wink. Never seen so many Romanian flower sellers in the one place before.The site was right on the main trunk road with big 18 wheelers running all night. We weren't sure was going to burst through the tent first , the local population or one of the 40 or so Eddie stobbart lorries that passed about 15 ft from our heads.

Santapod – USC weekend, classic!
Ahhhh, I love the sound of a rev limiter & dump valve in the morning… 😆

Camping at Santa Pod in a muddy field full of chav's wasn't the greatest. Listening to Scooter once was bad enough, never mind for a full night.

The toilets at Santa Pod circa the late 70's ,BLEURGH

Parkfoot campsite & caravan park, near Ullswater.

It was filled with transit van campers whose idea of fun was to get absolutely bladdered and then make more noise than we thought possible.

Feral kids ran riot too and their bladdered parents were only happy for a break from their little tearaway so probably encouraged it.

3 days from hell that I'd like to delete from my memory.

The only time it bordered on being pleasant was early in the morning before they'd all woken up and shook their hang overs off.

T in the Park. It had rapes and stabbings too. Good job I'm always too pished to really care about the mud, noisy neighbours, rubbish everywhere, people pishing everywhere and lobbing bags of crap about the campsite after doing it in their tents.

Couple weekends ago friends suggested we stay at a campsite near Bakewell, Derbyshire. It was £2 a night each so I didnt expect much. There was nothing there, a few other campers but no obvious facilities.

Upon asking about the toilet etc I was led to a stone outhouse, in it was a toilet with a shower head poking out above the cistern. The outhouse was so small you could shower and take a dump at the same time. No toilet paper and mould all up the walls.

I am glad we were only there two nights, socially it was fine as it was just our group so the kids ran round etc and we didnt worry about the nose, but no even a sink to wash any plates etc, cant belive the place gets any trade but it does

I went to a campsite in Rhydd Dhu at the bottom of Snowdon recently, the site was lovely, but there were a lot of loud mouth pised up Scousers. Got nothing against Scousers, most I've met are lovely funny people. These were absolute cretins, talking about how much they love shaggin', downin' drinks, and shaggin'. Excellent. Would defintely go back to the site though, right next to a lake, fire pits, and at the foot of the big mountain. The landlord of the local pub and proprietor of the site is a nice bloke too. And scouse, funnily enough. So, it was not the worst campsite ever, just some of the idiots who have gone there might put it off for others.

"Great Langdale"

Yeah that gets bad – had an impromptu firework display one night. The one at Hawkshead too. I dislike camping at sites in the lakes and tend to camp up in the hills (if I'm organised enough) or get a B and B. But I dislike chintzy breakfast rooms almost as much!

The CYB one is a bit duff – the barn and rooms are OK but the camping field is a bit rough and boggy. Showers and loos are rustic but I'm used to that. The old caravan is unmentionable (it's gone now thankfully). But it is generally quiet and also super convenient for the trails.

EDIT: I forgot to mention the one at Castlerigg which has all the rules – it's mercifully peacefull no matter how busy as the owners are very strict. In fact me and my mate were were initially refused entrance as they deny same-sex groups. They let us in when I explained we were a gay couple; we aren't but it worked!

I too have experienced the campsite at Alston.
Any person staying here will not forget the toilet arrangments

Afan has a lot of midges – stayed once – wouldn’t again! It looses the sun too early too.

Stayed on sites in Scotland with midge issues too.

Rosemarkie near Inverness. Very worst of the stereotypical Caravan Club types. Treated us like dirt, when in fact our bikes were worth more than most of their cars.

julianwilson – Member
The warden at afan campsite once checked that a group of my mates weren’t gay

Did the warden want to be the “Only gay in the village”?

Campsite at Ouistreham near Caen in france, just off the ferry.

Local chavs climbing the security fence at all hours, local police around every hour, eventually a very loud “**** Off!” in English got them to move on from where we were pitched (with bikes locked on bike rack on car etc). Left very early in the morning!

A place called “Ideal Camping” down on the South of France. No grass, ground so hard that when you booked in the owner would lend you his lump hammer to get the pegs in. Tents packed so closely festival style that the guys overlapped. Then it all turned to mud when it rained & half the tents fell down due to a lack of straight pegs.

Then the owners called the cops & got all the english people arrested! OK we were a “little” bit young & noisey, but no more so than the Austrians & Swiss we were sitting & drinking with!
French cops “Are you english? get in the van”
Girls “Waaaah, we’ve been arrested”
Me “Well we’ll probably get a better nights sleep in the cells than we will in this sh1t hole!”

Character building so it was.