NOne of those stories are late.

I got quite stoned before flying to Australia when I was a backpacker.
I was at Heathrow, boarding pass in hand a good two hours to spare, then about 35 minutes before boarding I decided to head to the plane, but somehow during my inebriated state I had lost my boarding pass.

I bought a new ticket, then cancelled it as my boarding pass was found. I ran to the plane with a helpful security man who told me as I ran on that I was minutes away from having my baggage taken off.

Top it all off I got strip searched at Syndey airport but that is another story altogether

My father in law is a monk.

He’s a usless bag of shite who is a monk because he was too lazy to get a job and took the easy option of begging for alms every morning instead. He was a crap father before being a monk as well. He spends most of his time stressing the family out by going galavanting around the country not being a monk, getting kicked out of temples and made to go to other temples because he is unreliable.

MIL is ace but mental, she does magic and believes in the healing power of magic etc. Nothing stranger than having her chant incantations over my knackered hand and then blow on it to get it better.

They live about 7000 miles away so it’s ok.

so switch over next time.

NO!

It would ruin all the fun of posting threads like this and getting replies like yours.

^ You forgot step 2.5, Heston uses liquid nitrogen to make ice-cream…….again and again and again

Is that one of his creations from another show, Yunki?

Just sat through some crap on channel 4 with the missus while I wrote up some notes for tomorrows classes.

What a load of drivel. He’s like that kid at school who was wierd and caused controversy just for the sake of it.

Hitman Pro

if you can afford 1000 litres inone go you can buy rapeseed oil from wales at 80p per litre, but has to come in 1000l bowsers

Hitman was the only program that properly rid my computer of some pesky spyware last year.

Cloud based spyware software

Never had any issues with it.

Streamed everything to my 360 when I used it as well

Mrs Q bought me secretly (with a bit of input from me via dad) an Acer Travel Mate Tm8371 for my birthday

It’s not ground breakingly fast at 1.4ghz dual core, but it has 4gb ram, it has 500gb hdd it has about 8 hours running on battery economy mode. It does pinch zoom. I has a mag alloy case.

It’s 1.5kg, small light and cost 369 for this model.

There is a lower hdd and memory one for about 329 but the extra is worth it.

I was dreading losing my lovely THinkpad keyboard and now I think it’s pretty much spot on for me.

hitman

Dad’s side – his father owned a chain of booky shops in ayrshire and southern ireland, he also owned a dog track and most of the dogs that ran in it.
A friendly rogue who had the old bill in his pocket and would be tipped off on raids of his shops.
Prior to the bookies he owned a national haulage firm which as a sideline during the war smuggled sausages and nylons from Ireland.
THe family even made it into the newspapers when his mother sued him for half the haulage firm.
Great great granny alegedly had a thing with a member of royalty as well, but little is known about it.

I’ve just rebuilt my Wanga and although I haven’t had much of a chance to run about on it, the odd nip to the shops and around the streets has reminded me how much fun it is.

http://www.expatessentials.com/

http://www.expatdirect-uk.com/

http://www.uk-groceries.com/

Can’t remember which one I have used in the past, but even though pricey it sorted out drunken craving.

what country?

Wasn’t Arnold C**t was it.

That is one of their tricks, also saying the V5 is at another branch so you can’t see it and of course their favourite – not knowing what the APR is, yet they are authorised to sell finance packages.

How long is your policy over and is it a fixed payment or decreasing (if you don’t mind me prying).

==

Just looked at one of the comparrison websites and found that 500k is around 30 quid a month.

I feel the broker who I spoke to last time may have been trying it on.

==

we have two policies, one linked to the mortgage and one independent. if either of us die the other gets the market value of the house in a lump sum and about 10k a year for life.

What sort of policy pays out yearly on event of death is that an assurance policy?

\russian press conference invaded by flying dildo

Doesn’t make Tom Clancy appear so far off I reckon…

Nope and more importantly there doesn’t appear to be too many of the tin-foil-hats in that link either.

Stuxnet Article – Interesting Reading

Thanks for that Stuxnet mention, that is quite interesting reading.

^ So in essence the next global war could be fought via computers rather than men on the frontline.

Very Tom Clancy-esque, but sounds quite probable.

Do countries protect their undersea fibre optic cables?

Intelligence. Explain some more on this if you can. What are we talking about?

If you follow the computer game industry their games suggest it will be over resources, oil the main contender at the moment. However a few are suggesting (can’t remember which) that water might be the big one to fight over.

THe nuclear war is hoefully out of the question, or it would all be over very quickly. However could an unstable state such as Iran or N. Korea start of a global war by attacking a neighbour? Would China step in to protect N. Korea in the event of them getting trigger happy?

How old are you ?

It covered the spread of years for a portion of STW from the young uns up to the older ones.

So back on topic.

Excellent.

I just remembered that the missus’s bike, which is unused due her enormous belly, has an 8 speed Alvio on it. That should do the job for now.

I thought they were interchangeale on the attack mech.

THat would answer that problem though. Need to get another mech.

AN 8 speed shimano mech, that will be fun.

nothing off boobs (phew )

Do you have any before and after photos?

taff wars is better.

Is there a Welsh version? Excellent. Do you have a link?

Panacea

The Panacea who came up first in the search, but decent track

what would you suggest then? cars a mk4 golf tdi 130, 160k on the clock. I use cheep’ oil and filters (to spec) it dosent cost that much… and seems to be keeping the car fresh.

As far as I am aware, from VW forums, PD engine is really picky about it’s oil. Cheapest I can get it is 30 quid for the five litres, plus filter, plus lunch for my wrenching mate.

I use the longlife oil, as far as I know it is what has always been used in my car, so I stick to it, as well as changing at 10k, but I know that if I go over it the longlife is ok for a bit.

I have thought about those pumps syphons and quite fancy the idea.

THis is STW it’s never closed, other than when broken.

Here this thread can be resurrected in a years time when somebody else is bumped of 1.60 to remind us all of how to use Paypal.

The weird thing is that as you get older you start to appreciate the gift of socks more and more until you get to the point where you’re like: “Oh socks! ****ing yes! I NEVER remember to buy any of those little ****s and here they, delivered by Santa and his band of merry ****ing elves. Warm feet for another year!”

I love getting socks now. I haven’t bought any socks for years now.

And if people have unpleasant memories of what they received for Christmas, then that’s got to be really tragic I reckon.

Too easy…………

poppa – Member

For the record, don’t buy a Parker.

Why not?

DEZB the Macc Lads are worth investing time in, Sweaty Betty is one of my faves.

If you aren’t too easily offended.

“But I LOVE you!”

I wouldn’t have the speaker sup too loud in the office with song mind.

It came from me, I’m not proud of it, but it was needed.

Her-“What do you mean you’re at your parents? I’ve been waiting at the airport (Amsterdam) for hours for you. Does this mean you’re not coming to live with me (and mum and dad, gran and the two brothers)?

Me”OBviously not ” click.

She was 19 Dutch, had met me whilst traveling around Australia, had fallen in ‘love’ and wanted me to live with her in Holland with her family.
I had stupidly said yes…………..and then had her hanging on for another 6 months while I bummed about the world.

Can you give a C? Can you give me a U? Can you give me an N? Can you give me a T? What does it spell? Quirrel.

WHy not use the handy paypal fees calculator to work out what is paid minus the cost to either cover the 4% if you are feeling generous.

Just be glad it’s not Western Union they charge about 40 quid