My tuppenceworth FWIW as I've been there more than once.
Couple of questions (apologies if this has been covered and I missed it)
What was the reason for her first 'marriage' ending?
Do you realise that she is still lying to you about the 'other' relationship?
Are you prepared to continue to live with a woman who, for whatever reason, is/was prepared to shatter 6 lives ie. yours and five children for a relationship that she is now openly grieveing over?
I will never pretend to fathom what goes on in the mind of some women (and men for that matter) and by all means go to counselling if you feel it will be worthwhile.
Sorry if the above is rather blunt but you are in a truly crap situation and appear to have been dumped on from a great height. One thing that struck a chord with me was that she 'got moody' when you refused to share the bedroom. She is the one in the wrong and sounds like she is very used to getting her own way.
As I don't know you (or your wife), I would therefore never offer advice but maybe the above will give you some food for thought.