I am sorry kaeseeieaeieae, I don't wish to offend you, but you are coming across as a little highly strung.
YOU need to concentrate on getting your business off the ground. And of course recovering so you can walk. Really try to avoid destroying any Faith anyone has in your company. Especially by posting your fantastic political ramblings.
My sugestion would be thay when you Experience any Negative feelings Towards you Allow it to pass you buy and do not Let it Nudge you Over the edge of a Waterfall. Finally there are no Universal Conspiricy theories its just Karma Overload.
Finally keep the Faith brother