First up – sobriety is quite right.
Secondly, a couple of droll anecdotes.
My friend and I were walking into town with enough to get into the Mud Club (£2) and a couple of quid left over for a few jars at £1 a pop. Not many.
Half way there, we spot a lad running (staggering) for a bus. He's pulling change out of his pockets, and every time he does so, he's dropping notes all over the pavement – must have been paid in cash – it was a Friday.
So we shouted at him, "Hey Mister, you're dropping yer money!".
And he shouts back, " Go 5uck yersels, ya wee c&&&&"
We followed him down North West Street for a quarter mile picking up his £10s and £20s. We ended up with a cool coupla hundred and got massively hammered. That's what you get for being rude.
Second tale; I found £60 sticking out of Asda's cashpoint. Given that there was a queue behind me, and that my conscience was pricking ( could have been an old lady's pension!!) I handed it in to a non-plussed customer services lass.
When we'd done our shopping, I went back to the desk to ask what would happen to the cash. The lass huffed and puffed and wrote down the details in a book, telling me to come back in six months if the money hadn't been claimed, which I duly did. I was then told that the money had been returned to the bank, as it had been found in a machine, not on the floor. What a load of w@nk. Next time, I'll spend it on beer and tabs.
