I’ve got the L200 Recidivist. It’s like the other L200 Animals, Sodomists, Dominators etc. but even more likely to turn you into a Dave Courtney / Vinnie Jones wannabe.

It must be some sort of horribly expressed number sequence with equals signs instead of commas…

One of those drying / airer contraptions.

Google maps on Android 2.1 or better is fine. Not quite as good as a real Tom Tom for some things (lane notification doesn’t exist), but better for finding the place you want to get to etc.

Fitting proper mud guards.
Bleeding brakes is just a massive faff.
Wrapping bar tape.

You’ll be wanting a fungicide. Mildew’s a fungus, not a bacteria.

You can repair bent alloy wheels, but I wouldn’t bother. There’s a bloke up our way who does them, generally Porsche & Ferrari wheels that cost a couple of grand a piece, and Moto-x bits that have cracked.

With a Corolla wheel, you’ll be saving bugger all over the cost of a replacement (probably £70 to £80 for a repair and repaint), and have a repaired wheel, which is never going to be as strong.

I’d just get on ebay / autotrader / japanese car liker forum / scrapyards and buy a second hand wheel. There must be loads of Kevins about rolling on 19s with a set of standard alloys in the garage…

I drove a Citroen Dispatch for a while – doing about 1000 miles a week. And we also had a Citroen ZX for a while. They’re fairly equivalent vehicles – same technology, same maker, same engine. Not like saying “I had a 95 Fiesta and then I got into a Vito and it was ace”.

The Dispatch (van) was slower, noisy as hell at speed, and was absolutely flat out at 80. The ride was horrendous if you had nothing in the back, and the body panels boomed like crazy over bumps. 3 people in the front was extremely cosy. And it used more juice – a lot more if you were trying to do 70 or 80 as it was effectively flat out. Handling was vague too, particularly horrible in crosswinds.

The ZX was a Audi R8 by comparison. Less slow, comfier, quieter, more room for people, used less fuel etc. Had odd sliding rear seats which made for masses of boot space if you needed it.

I’d never drive a van as my only vehicle unless I absolutely needed one for moving 8×4 sheets of ply or it was provided gratis…

Go somewhere else would be my suggestion. The jet lag takes the best part of a week to get over, and it’s not that good in my book. Food was generally poor.

Paris would be my first choice for a honeymoon.

He needs to go and have a word with himself. People have pedalled faster in lycra…

On the other hand, the jet luge was top stuff.

You want an SDS drill for drilling concrete. You’ll get nowhere with a standard hammer drill.

The cheap B&Q ones were a complete waste of time for me, and I tried most of the shop’s stock. The basic Wickes one is good though.

2011 Specialized bikes are already reduced. I’d go to your nearest bike shops and try out a spesh, giant, merida or trek hardtail and get one bought.

Absolute basic specs are:
8 or 9 speed.
Alivio or Deore rear mech.
Hydraulic disc brakes. Preferably Shimano.
Rock shox, Marzocchi or other decent spring or air fork, preferably with adjustable rebound. Not an RST or Suntour, and nothing with elastomers.

The main things are getting decent forks and frame. I wouldn’t get overly hung up over things like non replaceable chain rings as a cheap Shimano chainset is cheaper than a set of rings.

I wouldn’t bother with second hand, too difficult to find a decent bike for sale nearby, and spending hundreds on the classified ads on here is too fraught for my liking.

A decent locksmith will be able to get in and plug in a computer, read off the required info then cut and program new keys.

I suspect a Pajero will have chip keys, so removing the aftermarket immobiliser isn’t the whole story. You’re unlikely to be able to hotwire it.

I’d expect to pay around 100 pounds, upwards of that if you’re in the south.

Ultimately, you’d sell bugger all cars on the basis of “Guaranteed for 20 years / 500,000 miles” or at double or treble the price of a standard car. I don’t think it would be a major technical challenge – I’ve been in plenty of Merc Taxis that have done massive mileages and seemed to be fine. Your biggest problem would probably be the interior wearing out.

The majority of new car buyers are interested in having a new car – status, image, technology, increased fuel economy, lower noise levels etc. They’re not really that interested in real long term longevity. So who the hell would you sell them to? Tight arses like me are happy to motor about in cheap second hand cars from reliable makers…

Or to take an example from another sector – I’ve got a Nokia 3310 and an Ericsson R310 knocking about the house somewhere. They’re both reliable, better at making calls than my current smartphone and have longer battery life. Bugger all chance of me using one as a day to day phone though…

Pet / farm supplies, you want feeding syringes. I just rang round the local ones.

Lockheed or Delphi rubber lube should do the trick. It’s red rubber safe grease.

I seem to remember a very similar moan about insuring a people carrier about 12 months ago…

Molgrips, 30 year old Golfs used normal steel but rust from chips doesn’t spread. VW just used very good primer.

Not all fancy steels have corrosion resistance, and the paint, seam dealer and cavity wax process has far more to do with the level of corrosion. I’ve had galvanized cars rust at the seams due to rubbish Sean sealing…

Personally I’d treat it as a lesson, and make clear to your sister that she’s going out with a waste of space.

The fact that he’s a waste of space will become apparent sooner or later, and it’s probably better now than when he’s racked up thousands on a joint named credit card or similar…

Fewer for discrete items. There are fewer cats.

Less for your more nebulous things like water coming out of a tap or emissions out of an exhaust pipe.

I wouldn’t put too much faith in the 7 year warranty on KIA etc. The ads always point out it’s powertrain only, ie engine or gearbox failures, and they’re incredibly rare faults on any modern car.

I’ve driven all sorts from 60 horsepower Superminis to 300 brake barges.

Getting nicked once for “I didn’t twig I was speeding” is just about understandable, three times isn’t.

I suspect she’s best off going up before the beak with a good lawyer and pleading poverty if she gets banned.

No need in my view. There are plenty of heavy mountain bikers and they don’t seem to be mashing through bearings at a great pace.

Probably. There are lots hidden in petrol station signs etc. that you’d never spot.

I suspect that the inverse square law means you get much higher doses from calling people regularly or using Bluetooth headphones than you do from living near a mast.

I’d probably worry more about a wind turbine to be honest. House in the wrong spot, low sun and you get a lovely shadow strobe effect…

Cheers all. Don’t care much for mags in general (tend to cause nasty bouts of upgraditis in my medical opinion), but I do like Multi-tools (it’s a nice Lezyne one, FWIW) and I do like the odd free phone holder, route and skills DVD.

Campagnolo. Don’t care if it’s better or worse than Shimano, I just like it on a road bike.

John Deere. We’ve had a couple, and again, no idea if they’re better or worse, but they’ve run well for us.

Henry. Cost very little to run and work well.

There’s no point in giving more than your legal minimum most of the time. I’ve heard plenty of tales of people telling the boss “I’m off travelling on XYZ date” or similar, expecting to have that as their leaving date, and finding their employment suddenly curtailed.

There are plenty of firms that don’t want anyone in the business who doesn’t want to be there, and will pay gardening leave for your entire notice period. Particularly if it’s a line of work where a hacked off employee could create havoc or upset.

Well, the Superstar one I have is rubbish (a fair groove at one point, only ground one way so it judders), so yes, cheap ones can be iffy.

Shimano and Magura ones I’ve had have all been spot on. Wavey / drilled should clear muck and gas better, but broadly it’s much of a muchness.

If you want better brakes fast, then better pads and bigger discs are the way.

It’s not something you’ll find hard figures on. I did an Msc dissertation on the subject – new product for electricians on wiring and rewire jobs.

The short answer is that people are new to new ideas, if they help with meeting regs or save time and cost. The issue is that by and large, they’re not looking for new ideas / materials / technology.

The other angle is to market to the specifiers – get a housing association speccing your kit and suddenly a lot of contractors have to use it.

FWIW, I was using an SLX double mech and still dropped the chain. Might work better if you have an unramped chainring.

I did, made up some alloy washers and used my existing bolts.

Occasionally dropped the chain off, so I got a BBG bash guard for a tenner.

Seems like a fairly common thing with Schwalbe tyres. I had a pair of Fat Alberts – one went way out of true, and the bead on the other stretched so much that it couldn’t be fitted.

I just don’t bother buying Schwalbes now.

Halfords do some hub geared Pashley style bikes which are far more realistically priced for 50lbs of pig iron.

Tea and coffee not a very healthy choice as makes you hypoglycemic and is toxic to the human body.

The dose makes the poison. By your reckoning, unicorn farts are toxic, because if you breathed nothing but unicorn farts, you’d be dead.

STW Car Wisdom.

Skoda Octavia – Good.
Audi TT – Hairdresser’s car.
VW Beetle – Bad.
Audi A3 – Tailgating junior execs only.

All of them have been based on the MK4 Golf at some point (A3 to 2003, Octavia until 04 etc.). It’s not a bad car, with the exception of soft touch plastics that wear badly (have a look at the interior door pull handles of any MK4 Golf), and window regulators that break occasionally. Mechanically and bodywise, they’re sound.

Wider roads, mild banking on corners, long sight lines, curved lamp posts, no trees within 20 feet of the verge.

Beano then Viz.

The main difficulty you’ll have is that you’re travelling about. The best thing you can do is get a coolbox in the car and make sure you have something decent to eat in it, even if it’s only a Marks and Sparks thing from the services.

It’s very easy to say dodge the burgers and pasties, but when you’re in the middle of nowhere, with limited time, they’re often the only choice.

Other than that, it should be pretty easy for you. You don’t sound like one of those people who eat stuff all and still don’t drop weight. Water instead of pop, espresso or macchiato instead of a latte, far less chocolate, biscuits and cake. More veg, more meat, more beans, wholegrain bread etc.

You refine crude oil and you get fairly standard proportions of petrol, diesel, bitumen etc. out.

You can rework the output to make more diesel and less other stuff, but like any rework, that costs.

The other issue is that diesel always used to be taxed less than petrol, now it isn’t.