Sharki, I caught myself trying to use this thread as an 'explanation/apology' for my own life experiences. That would be wrong of me.
I've got tons of work that needs doing. If I can't be arrised doing it myself, though, it can't be all that important!
If, however, you are passing this way, there is always a brew on the go. I might even push the boat out and provide <substitute biscuit of choice>!
There is a lot of truth to be found from the kindness of strangers, even if you, at first, think they are being negative.
Take care.