Oh, hubbys partial pneumonectomy was from the side rather than the front. I guess that may have different implications for recovery but the prospect for resuming riding will be similar.

Hi
My husband rode with one slightly impaired lung (post amputation of his arm- he lost some of the supporting muscles on thatside for breathing) and one third of an operated-on lung.
The surgery and recovery was quite hard on him and he rehabilitated by using the turbo trainer so he didnt have to move about too much. At first he was pedalling for just a few minutes but he a stubborn and determined man and was riding outdoors again after about four months.
Good luck with it all. Glad it was picked up and you’re on the path to being fixed.

I have recently left IT after about 20 years and am retraining with a view to becoming a sport therapist. The circumstances allowing me to do this were pretty shitty but I had been talking about getting out for the past 5 years. thing is, its easy to go in every day and get paid well for a job you can do stood on your head. It took a massive kick up the arse to get me out of that comfort zone.
I don’t know whether sport therapy is going to be that perfect career but unless I try I am always going to wonder ‘what if?’ Aren’t I?

Written and rewritten this I don’t know how many times, can’t really find the right words…

Suffice to say, Macmillan is a great resource but don’t forget your local hospices because they do a fine job too. I guess any money any of us gives helps make things just that little bit less awful, somehow.

Okay, here’s one that started out as a sad life story – actually I had a glorious life that then took a turn for the shitty when my husband Julian got ill and died in June last year.
At the time I thought life would never be good again and I definitely wasn’t EVER going to get involved with anyone ever again because if you fall in love there is the potential for it to hurt – a LOT!

Well, as it happens I did ‘kind of accidentally’ meet someone and he is a really nice guy, he respects my husband and the life I had with him yet treats me as an individual (which I think could have been tricky if it had been someone that knew J personally) and is generally a top bloke.
So despite thinking you only got one shot at being happy I have been proved wrong and I couldn’t be more glad about that. I reckon that’s fairly good news and pretty life affirming. 🙂

Ridesheffield – will do at some point, when I know when/if I am going to be in Sheffield.

Glupton – another friend mentioned rugby clubs. Again, I will do that once I am more settled/know where I am going to be living in the longer term. I am going to take some time once I qualify to do massage work, I have another diploma course in Pre- and Post-Event sport massage booked for when this one finishes. I think if I can work in the sportier side of things for a while I will get an idea whether I want to commit the time and money to qualifying as a physio, or if I am happy where I am. I have dreamt of being a physio since, well, since I started in IT… 🙂

Pieface – I am in Stannington so I could come to your place if you have space for a massage couch?

I am pretty much booked up for this week now, and not available again until Friday next week, but anyone interested drop me an email – address is in my profile.

Thanks for the support everyone.

Thanks for all the responses so far. I have replied to everyone that’s been in touch and got a couple of you booked in.

Going to hold off contacting any clubs/groups for the time being as I am to-ing and fro-ing between Sheffield and Plymouth (and France) a fair bit at the mo. once I am more settled I will be in touch with them.

Thanks Dan. I will see what the response is on here and then maybe contact them.

I am indeed his wife. This is my new life. It’s working out okay so far – ups and downs but it is starting to become more ups than downs.

It’s sad that sometimes it takes a crisis to kick us up the arse and make us do the right thing.

Compared with what came before, binning my job really wasn’t that scary.
My husband left me in a position where I could afford to do it and it was exactly the right thing to do to honour the best man I ever knew. He’s looking after me even though he’s not here any more. 🙂

Ho ho. 🙂

Thank you. It took a fairly shitty situation to get me out of my comfort zone and back into studying but I feel better than I have done for a very long time.

Well I am not hairy, but the rest of it fits… Eeeek. Noticed you are in Berkshire – no, that’s not a lot better is it? Try looking at local colleges – apparently they often offer free/ cheap massages by their students.

Ian, I can’t see your email address however, mine is in my profile so if you can just send me an email I will get back to you.

Weeksy, niggles I can do, sorry you’re not closer.
I will be asking for volunteers in/ near Plymouth soon, so if that’s any better?

Well Weeksy, you’re in luck then – I am neither going to do it for you, nor am I a man.
Ianfitz, will mail you.

There are no extras – get yerself down Attercliffe if you want that kind of ‘massage’.
(The first post. I’m kind of disappointed…)

I thought Argo was really good too.

Biggest ‘wow’ film I’ve seen in ages though was Tyrannosaur. It was cheap in HMV and I saw Paddy Consodines name on the front so I bought it never having heard of it, let alone having any expectations.
Totally blown away. I NEVER cry at films – I was blubbering like a baby.

We had an 53 and I now have an 07 tourer (automatic).
I love it – it just carries so much stuff and is still pretty perky (especially for an auto). It’s been no bother at all.
Just went to the alps with 2 bikes in it, a 6 berth tent and associated camping crap and kit for road and DH riding and was able to pack it so it barely came above the level of the windows.
Not the most economical to drive, but it’s cost nothing but servicing and it does kind of get through tyres, but that may say more about my driving.
If you are in Sheffield, I would be happy to take you for a drive in it, just to give you some idea? (that sounds a bit dodgy, but I am quite normal and don’t crash cars for a habit, so you are quite safe…)

Grantus, thanks for posting the info.
As I said on your other thread, I’ve gone through (sort of) similar recently and I just want to say I hope you are holding up okay and I have been thinking about you a fair bit since your original thread.

I can’t believe DWP are denying you the bereavement benefits – did you at least qualify for the one off payment? I can’t get the regular payment as its means tested, but I still qualified for the one off sum.
Also, are you aware you may be able to get a reduction in your council tax and your power suppliers may be able to give you a better tariff if you ring them and just ask ( I did with my electricity but not the gas)
And if you ever want to just chat do please feel free to email me though, as I also found, there is so much support here and always someone to give you a bit of a prop up just when you need it.

Grantus, I can’t offer any practical help but as someone recently bereaved – fairly unexpectedly – by that **** disease, can I add my sympathies to those offered by everyone else. I felt the same as you, the arranging the funeral filling the time, but then once that was done the emptiness became almost unbearable. I was in a position where I was able to ‘run away from it all’ for a while – I don’t suppose that is really feasible when there are others to consider.
I found that our back, as yours was, were really helpful and pointed me toward that bereavement payment and other organisations, which gave me a head start on working out what to do next.

As I said, I don’t really have any practical advice really, but if you ever want to vent to someone in a similar position do feel free to email me. I think my email address is on my profile…
I really feel for you.

Efes on West Street/Glossop Road is really nice – mediterranean/turkish-ish food, not at all posh, but the food is delicious.
My parents took us there about a month ago and they keep saying they’ll come over so we can go back – they are not usually *that* enthusiastic so their food must’ve been good too.

Another +1 for Jean Reno in Leon.

Also Clancy Brown as Kurgan in Highlander.

Thank you all for your messages. The past two and a bit weeks have been horrible, but I have been busy organising stuff and it’s kept me occupied. Who knew there was so much to do.

His funeral on Friday was perfect, it really was. We gathered in a beautiful green valley and the sun shone throughout the service, even though it had rained for days before and it rained for days afterwards. There were a few tears but mostly I saw lots of smiles and there was some laughter.
I just wish J had been there in a more active role to see just how lovely it was, and how many people came to say goodbye. I think he’d’ve approved.
Two of the funeral blokes said it was the nicest funeral they had ever attended and so many people came up to me afterwards and said the same – that they didn’t realise a funeral could be such a ‘happy’ occasion. I think that’s how it should be and a testament to what a nice bloke J was and what a pair of hippies we were. LOL.

Now all the organisation is over I think I am going to struggle with the loneliness. I know there are so many people there for me, that I am not alone, but it is funny how – even in a room full of people – you can suddenly feel so very lonely. I’ll get there though…

(Erm, thanks for listening. I think I just needed to get that out)

Buzz, I’m sorry you found yourself in a similar position and I thank you for taking the time to reply with your thoughts. It means a lot. I will definitely be considering counselling. There is a very good charity here in Sheffield that deals with that kind of thing, so I will be speaking to them next week.

I am sure tomorrow will be a good day really, despite the obvious sadness and I am looking forward to hearing everyones tales of “dumbassery” that I missed out on – I am quite sure there will be a lot of those!!!

A hug, a kiss on the forehaed and tell her you love her.
If she wants to talk, she will.

Hi.
I never thought earlier and it is probably FAR too short notice now, but if any of you would like to come and say so long to him, or just have a drink with us afterwards, the funeral is at Wisewood Woodland Cemetery in Sheffield at 2.45pm tomorrow and then at The Plough Inn at Low Bradfield afterwards.
I appreciate a lot of you aren’t local, but I know some of you are and you would be more than welcome.
No sombre funeral clothes, just come as you are…
I’ll be the blubbering wreck up front, dressed in red. 🙂

Lovely words from so many of you. Thank you again.
It’s not making it any less painful but it IS making me smile to read all your comments.
‘Later’, at Julians request, I will be taking little ‘J dolls’ (format so far undecided) and leaving them in places we liked to go, so look out, on your travels, for little one armed dolls and smile for him when you see them. 🙂
I think he asked me to do this so he could ensure I did not become a hermit when he had gone.

Steve, I’d just come back to post that same link, so thank you.
There is a link in the article to a blog J used to write for a website called My Name Is Not Cancer which, if you have a bit of time, I’d love if you’d have a look. For a bloke who reckoned he had no writkng skills I think he wrote brilliantly.
Am having an okay day today – bawling my eyes out reading the many cards that keep arriving, but in a ‘nice’ way.
I can’t believe how many lives it appears he touched, I really can’t.
I feel so proud.

Thank you all for your lovely messages. I feel so proud of him when I read stuff like this (but you know that anyway) and I feel lucky to have been with such a remarkable man, even though it was for not nearly long enough.
I am going to miss him more than I can imagine but once everything has calmed down here, I think I am going to travel for a bit and visit some of his favourite cycling and climbing places and just remember the good times.

Also, got the frame back within 3 working days.

Two Brothers near the Foundry did a really good job on mine but if you strip it yourself I’d recommend masking the bb yourself. Had a fair bit of ‘overspray’ despite my insistance that neeeeede to be clean. Great finish though, and cheap. Nice blokes too.
(sorted the overspray myself with my brother in laws dremel. Took about 30 minutes but only because I was being a wuss.)

Oooh, I could right fancy a pizza now. Thanks, guys.

I think I could have done a lot more impressive/important/influential things, so perhaps not as successful in those ways as I could have been, but if I had I wouldn’t be where I am now. Apparently I am quite good at my job, even though I am not a director or a manager even, and some people have even said I am a nice person.
Had some pretty shitty times of late but I have an amazing husband, a good family and some fantastic friends so in that respect I have been very successful. I am not rich in £££ but I am rich in other ways and that’ll do for me.
So, do I consider myself to be a success? Suppose it depends what kind of mood I am in. 😉

I will be having toasted cheese scones and a bellini for breakfast, but that’ll be it for me until the evening as I am designated driver while sick boy is sick.
Of course, if he is not up to travelling anywhere, then I might have another bellini or two if I don’t have to drive…

I am beyond thrilled for you. Can’t wait to meet her and to give you all a big hug!

From a (slightly warped?) female perspective, I think Roux Jr is very hot. Oh yes.

The costermonger on the other hand – Mr Potato Head.

Back from seeing surgeon – he’s (as) happy (as he can be) he got all the tumour out and the extra bits he took out that looked a bit dubious have come back all clear from pathology. The chemo had done a job on the main tumour too, so the news is as good as it can be. That’s officially good news.

From J’s point of view, the best bit is that his chest drain came out today too. And that means, once that wound has healed up, he can have a long awaited soak in the bath. 🙂

Close surveillance at Weston park again now, but we can deal with that.

Just need to get the muscles healed up so he can get back onto his bike comfortably/safely.

So, onwards and upwards. Again.

Hi. Sorry for disappearing for a few days – been kind of busy.
He was allowed home on Wednesday last week with 36 staples and a chest drain. He’s had the staples out now and the wound is healing nicely, but the drain is still in.
He says he feels like he was kicked by a horse. (he even joked that he wasn’t sure about the theatre but the play can’t’ve been much cop as he slept through it AND the encore. ho ho!)
But, living up to his ‘nails’ reputation, we went for a steady walk up to the local library on Saturday morning and he did great – only a 15 minute walk, but it is slightly uphill all the way and he was less out of breath than before the op, which strikes me as a good thing. He said he felt better for using his legs!

Seeing the surgeon tomorrow for the ‘debrief’ – could be a bit scary, but he has already said that (as far as he can say, knowing what cancer is like) he got it all out. Just a case of hoping the 5 months of chemo blatted any floating cancer cells.
He is bored now. He can’t drive for 6 weeks, he hates relying on others to get out and about. He can’t lift anything heavier than a kettle of water for 6 weeks (so he can still make me a cuppa!)
He wants to get on his bike but can’t put his riding arm on for a while anyway, as the strapping goes right over the area where his operation site is. So it’s turbo only for a while. He *does* have a green light for exercise when he feels like it, but no real cycling for at least 6 weeks.
So, getting there – a minor setback, but we all know how persistent he is. 🙂

And Buzz Lightyear – all the best to your girlfriend (and you, of course)

They went back in and didn’t find anything specific bleeding, so they just cleaned it all out and fastened him back up. His blood isn’t great after the chemo – it’s good ‘for him’, but compared to a healthy person it’s kind of watery.

So, after Thursday nights little drama, he has gone from strength to strength and has had all the wires and pipes removed, apart from the chest drain. It is still draining more than the surgeon would like but he’s not too concerned and says it just needs some time and is probably just a ‘hangover’ from the 5 months of chemo.
He’s now eating well (he requested takeaway onion bhajis for tea and had a huge salad for his lunch) and is walking about pretty well. Various friends and family have visited and all have said he looks great and not at all like a man who had major surgery less than 3 days ago.
I think the consensus is that he’s nails. 🙂 I am not going to disagree with that.