Colne Valley Mountainbike Challenge on Sunday 8th May. 2 mins from J23 M62 if you’re coming over the big hill.

If you’re lucky you might get a granite fitting tool with them. Otherwise you’ll have to find your own trailside rock.

I love TJ.

And I’d deffo dry-bum Cynic-Al.

Tinned salmon sarnies, followed by tinned strawberries and Carnation. There was also an ice cream van that turned up during Family Fortunes every week, 52 weeks a year. I’d have a ‘special’ – large cornet with two ice lollies stuck in the top too. We seemed to watch Whicker’s World and The World About Us quite a lot.

We’d have lost the Ashes 5-0 and now be preparing to face Strauss, Pietersen and Trott in the South African side…

No doubt you were you attending to matters tonsorial in the rear-view mirror of your hairdresser’s motor at the time…

Being the organiser of the CVMBC, and therefore having a vested interest in the systematic sanitising of a number of local trails, I made some enquiries as to the whys and wherefores of what’s been going on. I was told that some bloke in the Kirklees Council’s highways dept. was on a crusade to use up a pot of money that would otherwise be withdrawn. The last trail to be affected that has a direct impact on the CVMBC route was the bridleway from the end of Lamb Hall Road down to the ascent through Outlane golf course. Previously it was rough, uneven and loose, and because of that riders were cautious, treat it with respect and we never had a single accident down there. Just prior to last year’s event it was given the same treatment as the tracks in the previous pics, with an additional removable post in the middle to, I presume, prevent vehicular access as it is now possible to take a shortcut from Longwood to Scape. The result? Several high-speed unplanned dismounts leading to at least one borked shoulder. Oh, the ironing…

Where’s next for the treatment then? Given that Crimea Lane at Pole Moor is in the process of being reclassified as a bridleway, my money is on this. In some respects I wouldn’t necessarily say that an amount of remedial work along the main stretch isn’t required, but it will be completely ruined as an ‘interesting’ trail if it’s given the same once-over by our friend at the Council.

The trouble is, and I’m as culpable as anyone else in this respect, mountainbikers/ing has/have little or no representation on any of the local forums (fora?). There’s plenty of folk involved in the various greenway projects and highways initiatives, but no one speaking out on ‘our’ behalf. I’m afraid to say that, on the whole, we’re a disparate bunch of generally disinterested individuals that prefer to whinge online than put ourselves forward to effect any real change. Probably because it’s just easier to use a footpath instead.

Very considerate of them to provide somewhere to park your bike whilst you’re necking your pint.

Cake That

Class in a Glace

What time does the weekly convict thrashing begin then?

Cost 3 of us about £400 (return) in petrol, ferry and tolls to get to Morzine from Huddersfield last July. As said earlier, the amount of extra stuff you can take with you in the car makes it by far the better option IMO. Especially considering the freedom you have once there too.

Lost a pair of Spesh Chicanes, bought as a birthday present, during a club run. Waited a while before replacing them with a pair of Spesh Divides, bought as a Christmas present, which I lost during a race last October. I’ve just got a pair of Spesh Arcterix. If these buggers go missing too I’ll be £240 down overall…

Elfinsafety – Member

Take her to see Beachy Head if you want her to see lots of the UK, no-one will ever know…

Apart from thousands of people on STW who will suss it out when they see ‘Australian MIL found dead at Beachy Head’ on the news!

STW? Beachy Head? Just blame the Mods… 8)

mogrim – Member

Yep but what’s mysterious is that I don’t remember eating it, someone must have applied the fat when sleeping!!

It’s not eating that’s the problem…

No – you just don’t have enough bums…

Punter reminds me of a kind of Lee Evans/Ian Hislop hybrid.

These days his antics are funnier too.

Give them a ring – they were very helpful to me when I rang them about a stem a while back.

Don’t really do female vocalists, but

Elizabeth Fraser &
Hazel O’connor

are two who I don’t mind.

cynic-al – Member
Djglover who do I shop the super rich to?

I never knew it could be that easy.

Shop ’em all to Fred – STW’s very own 1980’s-Ben-Elton-class-warrior throwback. That’ll learn ’em.

Start with Flashy….

Chris Kovarik called my DH bike “a sturdy beast” this summer. We atayed in the same accomodation as the CRC DH team for a week.

Chatted to East Bay Ray for 20 mins or so and got a pic taken with him too after the Dead Kennedys (mkII) played Manchester Academy a couple of years ago.

Stood next to David Gedge of the Wedding Present at a Chameleons gig at Leeds Warehouse in the mid eighties.

Jan Van Eijden was on the same Level 2 coaching course as me at Manchester Velodrome a few years ago. He was coaching the GB squad at the time, but the buggers still made him go through the same qualifications procedure as everyone else!!

Cynic-Al has slept on my settee.

Temple of Love – Sisters of Mercy
Ziggy Stardust – Bauhaus
Holidays in the Sun – Sex Pistols
Holiday in Cambodia – Dead Kennedys
L10 – Vanilla Pod
Sweet Sweet Pie – Pop Will Eat Itself
Power – Fields of the Nephilim
Alternative Ulster – Stiff Little Fingers

Pair of DH kecks?

Or MTFU ya big poofer!!

Oh, were some ickle boys playing with their broom-brooms again?

Awesome…

Scotland’s less than 2 hours from mine though!!

KT1973 – Member
My mum has a bikini with a sort of spider design I think. I’ll ask her where she got it

Nah mate, its not a bikini, more of a leotard style that she’s got…

8O

Not a Stiffee.

Finesse Products. There’s a whole range of other products as well as the multi clean.

This is what you need.

Unfortunately, it’s out of stock. Prepare to be laughed at.

Schwalbe Marathon Plus seem popular, judging by the amount we sell.

Take That? Uttershite for sheep and the hard of thinking.

My eldest daughter was well impressed when I took her to see New Model Army last year though.

The Southern Yeti – Member

I was nearly a feminist, but I realised infact I am a lesbian.

Male pattern lesbianism… ’tis a curse, I tell thee![/quote]

You’ve even started menstruating too? 8O

Hopscotch – Member
Thanks, can you tell me more about Marsden please?

Yes – the locals all have 6 fingers on each hand, have webbed feet and smell of dead otter.

Not at all like us Golcar lads… 8)

Job security is a real concern for the surgeon these days. I mean, one slip and you get the sac…

Whatever you do, get the basics right first. And that means Harvard Referencing. Both in terms of how to insert your referenced work into your text so that your writing flows well and is coherent, and the accuracy of your reference list at the end. I can not emphasise the importance of this enough, it is the foundation of all academic writing.

Also, ensure that you only use academic sources. Despite stating this, and providing examples, til I was blue in the face, I still had to mark work with references such as: walkerscrisps.com and milk.org!! The real bain was fooking wikipedia though. Never, I repeat never, use wikipedia. It is not an academic source and if you use it you will fail.

As a benchmark figure, I suggest using at least 5 different sources (books, journals, appropriate websites) per 1,000 words. More is better, but that amount will set you up well for years 2 and 3 – which count towards your final classification. Start off lazy and the yearly transitions will be a huge shock.

Good luck.

Another superb solution to a problem that doesn’t exist. Awesome.

derek_starship – Member
I rode the annual Calderdale Mountain Bike Marathon. 26+ miles around Sowerby Bridge, Midgley Moor,, Luddenden etc.. Had a rear tyre blow out and a minor off. Good hard ride with about 400 entrants.

I rode this event too. 1 head plant into a wall (thought I’d fubarred my lid, but luckily not) at the top of Stake Lane, 1 otb further down the same descent, 1 otb coming off Midgley Moor and a lost pair of Specialized glasses later, I came in with a PB of 2h 34m. More than happy with that. Although I could have done without losing me specs.

Who the **** would venture out in daylight with that on their bike? For crying out loud what next, mudguards on an mtb….?
*shakes head*

That Lahnden is a bag o’ **** shocker.

Don’t park your bike at The Angel Islington, it’s got 4 hotels on it…

Don’t forget Raffles the Gentleman thug in Viz.

Can’t do with him. Or Russell Brand. Or Russell Howard.