my old man is frankly a legend; so much so that when i couldn't make my mates wedding due to being in a different hemisphere ,he got invited in my place to sit with all my mates at the rowdy table to keep them amused.
His best line was while sitting outside a boozer in Carlisle with me -a very attractive but seriously up herself young thing tottered past on high heels, Dad just said "she still as to sit down to shit like the rest of us son"