…and she didn't pass it on to your daughter either!

Sorry, did I overstep the mark? Please accept my apologies, but I've been under a lot of pressure lately. I've been in a spot of bother with the police and now I find out my upstairs neighbour is planning a loft conversion! 😉

(sorry if that gets this thread closed too!)

headfirst – Member
when did my wife build up her immunity?

She certainly didn't inherit it from her mother… 😉

It's a great way for those who've ruffled feathers to "wipe the slate clean" without earning the trust and respect of other forum users.

Maybe it thought she was concealing a mackeral…

That's awesome! I've linked it to my Facebook…

Aside from the obvious danger (and it's not something I'd risk for kicks) am I the only one that found getting a full-bore whack of the mains not unpleasant?

Not sure whether it was just general glad-to-be-alive-ness, but I felt quite euphoric afterwards…

I stayed in a hotel in Edinburgh at the weekend where there was a free copy in the room. Had a feature about orgies, which was alright for a quick hand shandy while the missus was reskimming her face in the bathroom.

I'm the same since I had a tumble off one of the 'humps' at Gisburn and separated the AC joint in my left shoulder.

I do think they're pretty pointless, there's not much reward from riding them, and the potential for serious injury is very high – my fall was simply down to my rear wheel spinning out on wet boards as I reached the top of a platform.

Soak in bleach. Seems to work on my base layers and they're still in good nick… (Berghaus and Northface)

I've been here since 03 under various guises…

Tiltviewer is fun…

http://www.simpleviewer.net/tiltviewer/app/

IanMunro – Member
Is your favourite fantasy 'two lesbians probably… sisters… you're just watching'?

Just watching??? You're sick.

It's the best do-it-all cross country bike I've ever ridden Sean. I'm still yet to find a more modern bike that rides as well. And I've never suffered with fast wearing bushes, which is supposedly a problem with these – Only had to replace mine once in 5 years.

Have fun with it!

130mm Talas RLCs on mine. Never have any need to drop the travel as it climbs fine with 130mm.

Sorry guys, just been building a conveyor belt out of a pair of redundant Rubber Queens. I'll report back…

Like I say, enough troubles of me own. Let's solve this problem first. I'm liking Mogrim's idea best. Do you have any formal qualifications to back up this assertion?

Do you share breakfast with a noisy stirrer? If so, I don't want to know about it. I've got enough troubles of my own without you burdening me with a noisy stirrer. Soz.

Oldgit… No. You mayn't.

Jamie, when I finally crack this mystery, I won't have any spare time. I've an awful lot of sleep to catch up on!

My wife is called Heidi..

Did she used to go to Squires Nightclub in Preston?

That's a very large motor!

There's a motor??? That must be one helluva penis enlarger.

(TBH, my eyes can't get past the camel's toe… It certainly makes my boy-bits a bit longer/thicker)

I had a goat called Heidi, named after the badly-synch'd Alpine TV temptress.

Once met a girl in a club who introduced herself as Heidi – I told her "I used to have a goat called Heidi"… Smoooooth.

My Mum tells me I used to sit transfixed as the little girl out of Little House on the Prairie came on TV. Saw her on a TV program a few years back and she's white-hot now, so I obviously had an eye for talent!

Hora, we have very similar tastes in the fairer sex…

Just added cock holster.

Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman. Here's a picture of her picking up a penis enlarger…
My current OH bears more than a passing resemblance too. (face, hair etc… Not the fact that she's always picking up a penis enlarger)

Thanks all, both are low mileage, so wear shouldn't be an issue. I'll give it a whirl and see…

Cheers!

…And you get to go to pikey's weddings at weekends for a bit of extra cash…

Shtep in toim!

+1 for chimney sweep, sounds freaking awesome… 🙄

Hmmm… 6 figure legal bill? Or apply for legal aid…

6 figures buys an awful lot of moral high ground.

Another reason for getting a petrol one, it'll make your shed smell all lovely and petroly and cut-grassish.

Mmmmm…

Small petrol rotary every time. Anything with a Briggs and Stratton or Honda motor will be perfect. Lawn will be mown and Pimms poured before you'd have time to roll up the cable on a lecci one.

Sounds like a quinsey. Probably the most painful and horrific medical condition I've ever suffered from.

And when it pops, and you have to make that split-second decision whether to swallow or hoik up a good mouthful of rancid puss, just pray to god you're in hospital and pumped up with morphine like I was.

Good luck.

Darcy, that was the reason for my Aunt's stammer.

I think the solution will vary from one person to another. If the OP feels he can broach the subject tactfully, then a quiet word might be in order. You never know though, this person may never have sought help or talked about his stammer before, so it might be an idea to research the subject and arm yourself with some pamphlets…

Or anything else you can use to protect your suit when he starts trying to spit insults and accusations of victimisation and bullying. ;o)

bassspine – Member
It's interesting, stammerers used to be quite common when I was at school (30 years or so ago), several of my school mates stammered, but I hardly ever meet one these days. I wonder what has changed in speech therapy in the last few decades?

The main difference is that nowadays, they don't force left handed children to write right-handed, which was a major cause of stammering.

How about the joke that ends with the line "My name's Paddy, and I'm from London… D-d-d-d-derry"?

My Aunt has a very bad stammer, and whilst some stammerers are a bit arsey about people finishing their sentences, she would rather people did as in her words, "If they didin't, we'd be there all f-f-f-f-f-f-f day."

Reminds me of the time my elderly neighbour went on a coach trip to Pontefract with the local church. They'd just pulled out of the car park, when she decided to slip earth's surly bonds.

Rather pragmatically, I think, the remaining 39 had a show of hands – officiated by Canon Slack, who I understand, said a few words – and decided to continue with their daytrip, leaving the late Mrs Powell on the coach.

I suppose old folk are a little more accustomed to dealing with death, although I do feel sorry for the driver who had to sit in a coach park for 6 hours with a corpse propped up on the seat next to him!

I just texted my mum and told her I had leukaemia. She's not speaking to me now… Do you think she's trying to double bluff me?

V. poor. 🙄

Why can't the prison system be self sufficient? If it funded itself, tax payers would harp on a lot less about how their money was being used to support crims.

Instead of sewing mail bags, why don't they produce big-ticket items, like Fabergé eggs or designer handbags? Let's face it, they've got plenty of time on their hands. And they could set up public services that utilise their unique skillset – like helping people that have locked their keys in their car…