Man, you’re all dorks! Commencal was cool, but isn’t any more (have you seen the Meta 6?). Anything by Santa Cruz or NS is, regardless of how it rides. Marin is now, but only bikes from the last 2 years. Whyte is too prissy and will never be cool. Cotic were, but are losing it a bit now. The Dialled Alpine is the coolest hardtail; the Tweak ones could have been, but are a bit too agricultural looking to be cool (again, regardless of how they ride). Anything carbon isn’t cool. Same for Trek or Specialized (except the Pitch). Again, regardless of how they ride. If you really need to be cool, Chameleon or Nomad.
In case you’re wondering, I have a Commencal.