Fender do a nice amp which is essentaily half a fender twin, can't remeber the model though (Fender only child?)

I like riding bikes – it's not exactly a team sport and all that wearing a uniform and kissing each other just cos you got your ball through the two posts more times than the other person did… do me a favour.

As for patriotism, where does it stop/start? am I a midland-er, a Southern-er, a Northern-er a Brit, English, a European, fool for taking the trolls bait (well that's a given)?

….The list is endless now be off with you and ask someone who can only function as part of a group on another forum on another website. I'm off up the mountains on my own on my bike where I don't need hundreds gurning thugs to argue over if I'm any good at it despite the fact that a statistical list proves quite conclusively what my achievements have been and are available for comparison with other groups.

Grum,

I got a reputation as the guy with the SLR at all the gigs in Notts and sent pics to the websites of the bands and their labels. After a while a few got used as press pics and I started getting speculative mails asking me to take pics and this snowballed to me getting a free trip to ATP a few times.

Olly,
I was stood next to her and her group. She'd have eaten you for breakfast mate. Unless you like sitting in town centre swigging a bottle of cider and self harming I don't think she'd have been you bag.

Although she was pretty creativly punk.

Her dress was made of tobacco pouches sticked together and she spent half the gig craddling a lad who had a jacket made of the same stuff. He peaked a bit too early and went from staggering about during gallows to lying on the floor very still for most the evening.

Gig was excellent, I used to take pics at gigs all the time and even got a few in some music magazines, that Gallows crowd shot is a winner.

If this is the big existential crisis thread I beleive it was meant to be then:-
I'm 31 and still haven't given up the dream, every job I get I raise my salary significantley and although this simply means so far I have gone from minimum wage to national average wage, in the five years it's taken me I have more than doubled my starting sallary and am intent on keeping on going.

On the other hand if you mean would I actually buy a ferrari- no just too impractical, I'd rather get a big plush 4X4 truck and stick the wife, kids, & dogs in it and head up the mountains every day.

I always buy leather and then the first thing I do when I get them home is give them a thorough coating of wax, then polish, then wax again.

Seems to work pretty good, softens the leather, waterproofs it good and makes the leather a bit more hardy too.

Winner.

Cos most of my mates were feckless artistic types laying around smoking and planning their next big gig/band/canvas and I was always willing to break out the tools to fix or build stuff for them to stop them living in toatl squallor.

I became revered as some kind of alchamist who actually owned tools and knew what to do with them and the nickname developed.

30 mins east of Peterborough?- is that Wisbech way?

I used to live there and ride 27 miles to Bausy Pits to go riding and then ride 27 miles back- crazy in hindsight, but that's what it took to get to anywhere with hills-these were technically big holes it being an old quarry, but you get the idea.

In short, no there isn't any MTB riding – bring your road bike and stay away from the locals.

I was hospitalised with suspected meningitis ten years ago, this turned out to be acute glandular fever and I was left with severe reactive glycaemia and PVS due to lengthy failure to treat me properly.

I manage the condition the same way as a diabetic, asthmatic or any other long term health sufferer might.

Stay calm and LOOK AFTER YOURSELF it's as simple as that.
You've not got cancer, aids, leprosy or any other life threatening disease.

What has happened is that Mother Nature has taken out the engine block of your 4.8 litre performance car and left a 1.3 that needs a bit of TLC. Not wishing the stretch the metaphor but what you have now is the chance to carefully hand craft a better performance engine out of it, you just need to know it’s limitations.

This won’t last forever, but you need to take your time and work at what is achievable, it might well mean passing on the all nighters for a bit and instead doing an afternoon trail attack type ride for four hours on a Saturday but then know that you’ve got to take Sunday out to watch TV and eat (life’s a bitch isn’t it?) to get your strength up.

The most important thing is to get the right fuel in your body and to give it time to recover and build itself up again.

You have got to be strict with yourself regarding your capabilities and not get angry that you can no longer do the big things you used to, this won’t last forever and you will get better.

Get a good dietician to help and think of it as a long recuperative holiday, take time to enjoy a relaxing summer and think of all the poor sods who have to take time out to get used to lost limbs or other permanently life changing complaints and you will soon put things in perspective.

I still have to be careful now, but my wife knows that when I start to go silent and moody that I need a sit down and sandwich. I spent eight hours in the Natural history museum the other week and had gone mute with tunnel vision by the end of it, I don’t remember but she marched me to McDonalds whereupon I ate two big macs without seaming to even breath or chew whereupon I re-surfaced and felt fine.

The golden rule is (to return to the car metaphor) keep plenty of fuel in the tank, refuel as often as possible and don’t over rev the engine, change gear instead as once you’ve got up the hill you can get up speed without damaging the engine.

Hope this helps email in profile if you want to talk.

I used to wear cowboy boots a lot with bootcut levis etc during the garage rock revival of the early 00s (see bands like Jet and the Datsuns for further evidence).

At the time I was working in the music biz and touring as a support DJ for lots of big bands. I actually spent £280 on a pair with a wooden heel I don't wear them today as they are a bit midlife crisis though.

I do still wear a pair of big square toed black engineer boots, but they look a lot less camp and make me an inch taller.

Cougar and Bear, that's so not fair. I'd just logged on chortling with glee at the prospect of being the first to get in with the old smack to the face joke and you both beat me to it.

pah

The cops will want crime numbers and proof – "how do you know it was YOUR bike Sir?"

Even more complicated if it's a mate's bike.

Get a pic of the scrote- preferably a good facial. The odds are if it's a 'known' then the cops will just love an excuse to kick his door down for a section 18 search.

Or wait till they leave it/lock it soemwhere and then put your own lock on it too and call the Police.

Go for a Mongoose and get the shop to fit some metal platforms.

You can't go wrong with a Mongoose.

I had a menace for Christmas about fifteen years ago, I cried the day I sold it.

The EDIT lokks pretty good to my aged BMXer eyes.

Here

Approx 45 mins most times. If it's real claggy mud that can slow me up a fair bit and has been known to double the time when the ground is so soft you can actually see it flex and you go accross it- I thought I'd got a flat it was so bad.

I don't know the history here, but I have to admit I did find DrPs quip a little on the thorny side and bordering on the rascist.

Next up jokes about starving Africans?

Clearly there does seem to be some micturation on the fried sliced poatatos here regarding previous appeals on the part of the op. All a bit sad since it does seem like there are some keen kids missing out here.

Bike hut carbon post on my Hardtail gripping bel air titanium saddle soaks up all the buzz nicley.

Core skewers on my five and an LX cassette with XT groupset.

Lidle micro pump used lots.

Lidle computer, Brand X panniers, Bike hut pannier rack on my commuter bike (trek FX)

A good mate of mine at the time many years ago had a pet chicken once, called Kentucky. Kentucky was huge (he used to say it was a vulture cross) and used to run to the back door to see him if he was in the kitchen and all the kids from the area used to call round to play with Kentucky.

One day a fox ripped Kentucky’s throat out and so my mate thought he’d get his revenge, he doped some meat and then staked the fox out after it ate the meat and passed out. He chopped off a limb a day until it died. The Fox lasted three days.

Some time after that the same mate cleavered off three fingers belonging to a bloke in a pub over a disagreement.

Some time later still he was doing a three stretch for the massive drugs operation he was running via local biker gangs, not to mention the unproven accusations regarding firearm retailing.

Just ask yourself, do you really want to be like this kind of person?

NB, Just to make this clear, I no longer have anything to do this guy whatsoever.

Windows 7 and 'InPrivate' browsing sorts out the history, have you not seen the adverts?

Praise the Lord.

Tesco do a £15 compass watch.

Or the Iron Man compass watch for £30 looks pretty good.

Failing that how about a cycle computer that has the time on it?

I had a kid at Beaver camp this weekend called Isaac Hayes, he was skinny, white with platinum blonde hair. I get the feeling his parents may have been of rather middle class stock and possibly not aware of the theme from shaft or the album Am I black enough for you.

My mate's halfwit sister has just named her new daughter Oliviar, depsite having the double barreled surname of Berry-Melon due to her parents ill advised double barreling. Cue Olive-Berry-Melon.

My total fave is my mother in laws pupil Jenna Taylor, it's a rough area and I doubt the word genitalia figured in her parents lexicon. (edit that'd be me then Yetti)

Peterpoddy- if only, if only….

It seemd almost plausable and I was very new to this MTB thing.

it's in my top ten list of stupid things I have done along with throwing a valuable guitar up in the air at the end of a gig in an art gallery with a stone floor.

I used to use one of those pump spray bottle things with some ecover washing up liquid in- it did a great job.
These days a hose with a bucket and sponge.

On a cautionary note never evere ever believe some old BS you find online that watered down turps is exactley the same as Muc off, it isn't and it messes up everything from the stickers through to the bearings. 😳

I too bought a Citroen and hadproblems basically take it back to the dealer be nice- firm but fair and you should be ok.

Don't tailgate me into a set of jumps, it'll end in tears.
If I'm clearing trail debris don't charge straight into/at me (edit- usually from behind me) and start yelling at the last possible minute that I'm in the way.

If is stop and fix your bike when the mech is spread all over the road and your ten miles from home say thanks and maybe talk to me instead of starring at me like a dumb animal- you know who you are young man on the A60.

I've still got loads of BMX/youth talk carry over, I guess my use of the words stoked, gnarly and awsome are no different from my gran talking about the wireless when she meant a radio. I didn't know they weren't acceptable until a few minutes ago.

I still haven't quite adjusted to useing the word DVD and often refer to watching a video.

I have ceased to wear baggy jeans down my butt though even if Jay Mirren, Matt Hoffman and Tony Hawk are all at least ten to fifteen years my senior.

Easy now, I didn't mean to pour boiling water on your ice cream.

I'm a fan of retro skateboard speak meself- anyone for a bongo?

it not fashionable to now call a wheelie a manual and an edno a front manual?

No, because a wheelie is when you pedal it along and a manual is when you scoot or propeel it along with just momentum.

A ha a chance to shine 🙂

This is exactly what I deal with every day as a business crime coordinator specialising in retail premises.

Yes you should report it to the Police as it counts as ASB and assault (if they want to run with it). If the individual has issues then these need to be referred and dealt with as this type of behaviour is unacceptable. He may not have injured you too much as a fit average age man, however if it had been an elderly lady or a child the matter would be quite different. I would regard this as a trigger offence for further actions.

If it was one of my cases and the staff of a store acted this way I’d be looking at their alcohol licence and considering their suitability to retain it.

+1 Firestarter,
you enter my home without permision, you lose all your rights.

I think our new leader(s) might be on my side here too.

Yep I agree with the last two, go for the open cat and as a suck it and see option then work out what suits you best.

First XC race I entered (15 years ago) I went straight into the sport cat when I really should have gone for fun as I had zero experience of a situation where people were actually racing as opposed to just pootling along at a moderate speed with no sense of competition.

Just ask and if they say yes then do it, or offer to pay towards cost or press the fact that it's a one off- assuming it is.

Using the frankig machine to churn out postage for loads of parcels on a daily basis is theft.

I've done investigations as an employer and as a fraud invetsigator.

I'll help you out if you want advice on the interogation techniques etc.
Eamil in profile.

Maybe because I'm a slightly vain spinning class addict that has stopped reading mens health years ago as after 6 months you've read all that they are ever going to write.

Too true, every issue the cover features:-
I, How to get rock hard abbs/arms without trying/in hours/easily
II, Something about sex usually about it being good for her.
III, How you can eat/drink something usually seen as bad and get fitter eg curry or beer.
IV, How to earn more or get a better job
V, How to beat a disease, heart attack.

What is this? A centre for ants!

They've done studies, you know. They say 60% of the time, it works every time.

TSY

If I had a penny for every time my wife quoted that film at me.

yep, used to be a catwalk model, these days I'm a craggy 30 something with a busy outdoors life.

I've still got the cheek bones and the jawline, what was a snake hipped twenty year old figure buffed out nicley with the growing-spread being turned to muscle by a calculated increase in activity.

My mates of the same age are getting fat and smelly, I'm getting fitter.

I've got a smaller waste size now than I had back then.

(smug)

When was the last time you met an adult who could only crawl and communicated in burbles (Kicking out time at the pub excepted)? We all learn to wlak etc in the end it's only a matter of time.

I for my part walked quite early but refused to get out of the pushcahir that my younger sister was keen to vacate to walk – result a four year old in a buggy straining to stay together whilst his 18 month year old sister totteretd along in front.

They reformed recently minus the singer obviously.
The guitarist is now on vocals and the years haven't been kind. He's a dead ringer for Mark Gatiss from league of Gentlemen now, I couldn't take it seriously.

Invites to various civic do's
Spair emergency knotted cord cufflinks
Several commendation lapel badges that I'm embarrassed to wear
USB router that I use as a lamp stand
Halogen spot lamp
Terror attack cordon support hi vis vest
two year old box of fruit teas…

my desk is a tip, when I have a clear out it's like time team- I can find out what I was doing/eating/reading over the last period in a series of chronological strips.

I didn't come here for an argument!